Snarky Brides

slowly smacking my head...

Chipmunk415Chipmunk415 at the corner of Wine Ave. and Margarita Ln. member
500 Love Its 1000 Comments Second Anniversary Name Dropper

I'm getting married 3 weeks from tomorrow. The stress is starting to get to me, and after talking to my Mom this morning, I'm ready to throw something.

1) I requested Mom send me a photograph of myself when I was 3 dressed as a pumpkin for Halloween, to go with the photos I'm putting out of FI and I growing up (he was a pumpkin when he was 5, thought they'd be cute together). She found the photo, but tells me my Dad is trying to play sticky fingers with it, as he wants to create some sort of damn collage now.

2) Dad apparently wants this collage (that hasn't been put together) at my wedding. Said collage has no photos of FI. Umm, no. Previously, Dad set out a photo of my brother at brother's RD. There were no photos of the bride, and brother absolutely hates that picture- brother managed to get around it by saying that with everything going on, he didn't want anything to happen to the fragile frame (photo is over 30 yrs old), and lets put it away for safety.

3) Dad intends to make name tags- for my side of the family/the people he knows who are attending. I'm sorry, are we 6 and unable to walk up and say "Hi, I'm so and so, I'm friend/relative/whatever to bride/groom"? Plus, just for my side/his side- super rude. I'm already doing escort cards with table numbers. Snarky me wants to say to him "everyone will know who you are- you're escorting the bride up the aisle, AND I look just like you!"

4) Mom wants details on day of vehicle logistics. When I'm walking into work. She also wants to come to the salon the morning of and see how to unpin my hair so the curls will stay up, oh, and wash, dry, and style her hair AT THE SALON. Where she doesn't have an appointment. WTF. I told her I didn't know if that would be feasible.

 

It's not even 9 am on Friday, and I already need a drink....

Re: slowly smacking my head...

  • InkdancerInkdancer The Shire member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer
    Holy balls.

    I think Evil Chipmunk may need to appear a bit this week, just to tell everyone to STFU.
    Daisypath Anniversary tickers
    eyeroll
    Marzipan13Amyzen83pumpkinsandturkeys
  • Cookie PusherCookie Pusher Looking over your shoulder member
    Seventh Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Ugh, that is so stressful, Chipmunk! Booze for you!

    image
    ~*~*~*~*~

    [Deleted User]Amyzen83
  • Chipmunk415Chipmunk415 at the corner of Wine Ave. and Margarita Ln. member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    I'd also forgotten...13 yrs ago, at sister's wedding, Dad brought a huge packet of photos and started passing them around at sister's rehersal dinner....some of them were of himself running track in high school, military, etc....He and I need to have a chat this weekend.
  • Chipmunk415Chipmunk415 at the corner of Wine Ave. and Margarita Ln. member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments Second Anniversary Name Dropper

    FI is saying he doesn't mind if Dad brings a ton of photos of me or of himself....but that's not the point! I plan on gently bringing things up when I call, and if he mentions some damn collage I'll ask where he intends to put it, as I've already got a lot of things prepped and planned. That might shut him down...I hope.

    Ink, I'd let her out, but Dad did give me money that is paying for most of the wedding. While I can gently shoot down his half assed idea(s), I can't let Evil Chipmunk out of her cage. Plus, if I did, I've a feeling that while he wouldn't be an ass at the wedding, he'd be one every time I saw him from then on however long he lives. He'd also probably give my mom grief, and she doesn't deserve that.

  • InkdancerInkdancer The Shire member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer

    FI is saying he doesn't mind if Dad brings a ton of photos of me or of himself....but that's not the point! I plan on gently bringing things up when I call, and if he mentions some damn collage I'll ask where he intends to put it, as I've already got a lot of things prepped and planned. That might shut him down...I hope.

    Ink, I'd let her out, but Dad did give me money that is paying for most of the wedding. While I can gently shoot down his half assed idea(s), I can't let Evil Chipmunk out of her cage. Plus, if I did, I've a feeling that while he wouldn't be an ass at the wedding, he'd be one every time I saw him from then on however long he lives. He'd also probably give my mom grief, and she doesn't deserve that.

    In that case I'm mailing you wine and some soothing scent therapy candles.
    Daisypath Anniversary tickers
    eyeroll
    Chipmunk415
  • Chipmunk415Chipmunk415 at the corner of Wine Ave. and Margarita Ln. member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    Can you send a jacuzzi or garden sized tub too? My little bathtub won't cut it, and I need a long hot soak with the candles and the wine. FI can get his own wine.
    Marzipan13Amyzen83pumpkinsandturkeys
  • InkdancerInkdancer The Shire member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer
    Can you send a jacuzzi or garden sized tub too? My little bathtub won't cut it, and I need a long hot soak with the candles and the wine. FI can get his own wine.
    I can't mail my tub, but you're welcome to come use mine! Garden tub with candles on 3 sides.
    Daisypath Anniversary tickers
    eyeroll
  • Chipmunk415Chipmunk415 at the corner of Wine Ave. and Margarita Ln. member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments Second Anniversary Name Dropper

    yay!

    Incidentally- the hotel room I booked for FI and I the night of our wedding has a huge soaking tub. I checked before booking that room specifically. FI will have to wait after dinner, because I need a hot soak big time!

  • jenna8984jenna8984 clam bakes & patriots member
    5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    Hey at least your dad sounds like a proud peacock and cares! My brother just got married and my parents literally flew in at midnight the night before the wedding, and bailed from the wedding about 2 hours before the reception was over because they were "tired" from the 3 hour flight the night before. Then they flew home the morning after the wedding. I already it's going to be the same way for my wedding so I made it earlier in the day so they would hopefully stay the whole time.

                                                                     

    image

  • Chipmunk415Chipmunk415 at the corner of Wine Ave. and Margarita Ln. member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments Second Anniversary Name Dropper

    Jenna- this is less about Dad being proud of me/cares about the wedding and more about the fact that I'm three weeks out, everything is set, and NOW he wants to get involved with planning and details. My Dad also has serious insecurity issues (though he hides them well). They appear most often at gatherings like this, where there must be focus on him. His tried and true method- whip out pictures and run with it. This is likely a "me me me" situation, but I'm not the one yelling it- he is.

    My biggest stress factor right now related to wedding stuff is whether Dad can act like an adult. My brother had the same situation, 9 months ago, of bending over backwards to make things comfortable for Dad/make him happy. Dad likes to sit and tell you the same stories of his life/ his viewpoints on everything for hours. Normally that's fine, but not right before the wedding! (like he did to brother). He also will try to play big shot showing relatives around town. He pulled that on FI and I back during brother's wedding when we arrived in Chicago, and he ended up getting very pissy/yelling at me in the car when he had trouble dropping us off at hotel. FI and I made alternative transportation arrangements for the rest of the time there, (Dad had offered to take us to RD and drop us off at airport) and FI has sworn never to let Dad play tour guide with him again, not even if it's the middle of the desert and Dad's the only one with a car/air/water.

  • AddieCakeAddieCake Beyond the Wall member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    Ugh to that, but hooray to only 3 weeks away!
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
    image
    jenna8984
  • Chipmunk415Chipmunk415 at the corner of Wine Ave. and Margarita Ln. member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    update on this in my 2.5 weeks to go and bridezilla post
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