First off, I owe all of you ladies a big thank you for helping me avoid some very common etiquette faux pas. When I first joined, there were a lot of things common in my circle that are considered rude but never really thought twice about before coming here. Example: Cash Bars, Money Dances, Honeyfunds, PPDs, gaps, inviting ALL SOs not just couples that fall into certain parameters. Then there's one of the worst offender of them all that never sat quite right with me as someone who doesn't know much about wedding etiquette is the almighty B LIST. I've had a few friends mention to me how it worked and I kind of raised my eyebrows at that. I mean it's one thing to sort out your friends in order of priority when planning your guest list, but not AFTER INVITES have already gone out!
So that leads me to this current situation. I've been doing my best to be polite to my future guests and putting to use what I've learned on these boards and have even advised fellow brides on better etiquette friendly solutions to achieve the same desired results. I've especially been very good about keeping all wedding related talk off of FB and instead putting them on here. The only thing wedding related I've posted was when I got engaged to my fi and that's it, because I too find other people's wedding countdowns til I'm Mrs. Whogivesafuck annoying, or different wedding planning stuff on FB super obnoxious and annoying especially if it's not a wedding I care about.
Today I was checking my FB which I don't do very often and I see my FI's aunt posts ON my PUBLIC wall that she received our invitations and something along the lines of being excited for us. Now, I appreciate the fact that she's excited and it sounds like she and her family might come, and she's a really cool person, but just to be clear, so far I have only sent Save the Dates, and I didn't send them to all my guests, just out of town relatives, and bridal party, and officiant. I wasn't planning on sending the official invites until beginning of March because that's about the 3 month mark.
Here are my concerns
1. There's no way in hell I'm inviting all 500 or however many FB friends I have to my wedding, granted 90% of them probably won't care, but there are a small few whose feelings will probably hurt because for whatever reason we chose not to include them on our guest list.
2. I don't want the people who we are inviting to feel like they've been B-listed when we finally do send out the official invitations to everyone on our guest list.
I already hid the tagged post from my timeline, but I'm not sure what else I can do, or if maybe I'm over thinking this too much. I'm not sure whether it would be appropriate for FI to say anything to her since she is a grown woman and might be offended, especially since it seems like she meant well, but she is one of those people who lives their life on FB. Grrrrr FB! I'd delete my account again, but I realized there were a few features that I liked about it, and decided to just minimize my use. Like I said in the title, guess there's not much I can do but get over it and vent here
