Family Member vendor question

Re: Family Member vendor question

• misshart00 member

  

  February 2014

  I think you can ask what her rates are and go from there.

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• sarahufl member

  

  February 2014

  Ask what she is comfortable with. You never know, this may be an awesome opportunity for her to gain experience and exposure.
  

  
  

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• cowgirl8238 member

  

  February 2014

  If she is a guest she should not also be vendor.  That would be rude IMO. 

  If she's not intended to be a guest but rather a paid vendor, I would tell her what you;'re looking for and she how much she would charge you.

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• abbyj700 member

  

  February 2014

  cowgirl8238 said:

  If she is a guest she should not also be vendor.  That would be rude IMO. 

  If she's not intended to be a guest but rather a paid vendor, I would tell her what you;'re looking for and she how much she would charge you.

  Eh, we have guests who are vendors. Our DJ is a neighbor and close friend. He would be invited whether he's djing or not. But he happens to DJ, loves doing it, and want to help make our day special. He's getting paid - so he's a vendor. His girlfriend is invited, he'll have a seat with her for when his partner is spinning the tunes, and he'll get the same food and courtesies as any other guest. 

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• ashleyep member

  

  February 2014 edited February 2014

  cowgirl8238 said:

  If she is a guest she should not also be vendor.  That would be rude IMO. 

  If she's not intended to be a guest but rather a paid vendor, I would tell her what you;'re looking for and she how much she would charge you.

  No, she would be a guest regardless. I know a lot of times family members who work in the wedding industry will help out their friends and families on their wedding day. 

  
  

  I think the rude part would be expecting her to do it for free or at a steep discount. I don't know that there's anything inherently rude with asking, but it would be up to her to decide if she just wants to enjoy the wedding as a guest and not have the responsibility of videoing.

  
  

  My friend is my hairdresser and she'll also be doing my hair for the wedding - and is invited. But that, of course, doesn't require her to work during the ceremony or reception. So it's not really the same scenario.
  
  
  

  

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• singinchick13 member

  

  February 2014

  One of my bridesmaids is also making cupcakes for the wedding. It's a little different because the only thing she needs to do day-of is drop them off. I think it's ok to let her know that you love her work and would really love her to take a few clips at certain parts of the day, if she is up to it. You would pay her, of course, and don't want to interfere with her enjoyment of the day. In all likelihood she will be more than happy to do it, and may offer it to you as a wedding gift.

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• delujm0 member

  

  February 2014

  I think this is fine to do IF SHE OFFERS.  If i was an invited guest to a wedding, and then i was asked to do my day job while i was there (probably wouldn't happen since i'm an accountant, but still), i would be annoyed.  Even if i was getting paid, and even if it didn't take up the whole time.

   

  i would tell her what you're looking for and ask her for a referral.  At that point, she might just say "oh i can do that for you, i'll be there anyway, it'll be your gift, no prblem!" or she might actually give you a referral because she wants to just be a guest at your wedding.  i'm in a wedding in a few months where the bride has several relatives who are profesional photographers...and they helped her find a photographer for her wedding but didn't offer to do it for her because they don't want to work at her wedding.  they want to hang out with their family members and enjoy themselves instead.

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• photokitty mod

  

  February 2014 edited February 2014

  ashleyep said: I'm pretty sure I already know the answer to this,  but figured I'd ask anyway. We don't really want a videographer at our wedding, but we do want video - that is, I'd pretty much be happy with someone's iphone video of the ceremony/toasts/first dances. Just the key moments, nothing else.
  My fiancé's cousin is a wedding photographer/videographer. Is it wrong to ask her if she would record those moments for us? We would pay her, of course, but don't really want or need much editing. I know when she just started out she did her step-brothers wedding, but that might have been a different situation because she was just starting her portfolio. 
  I obviously don't want her to feel like she has to work the whole wedding, but I know she's likely to bring some of her camera equipment with her anyway.
  What's the etiquette on that? I'm leaning towards no, you shouldn't ask, but I don't know how I would feel if I was in her shoes.
  
  *******ETA QUOTE BOXES*********************
  Not to be a negative nelly, but…

  As someone in the industry, but not the wedding portion, it isn't quite the same - it depends on a lot of factors. What does she shoot with? I would never bring my sony video camera to a wedding. I do take my Canon D60, but I don't shot video with it. Sound is another issue…DSLRs don't have built in mics, so there wouldn't be sound unless she brought all that equipment, which you don't just carry around. My Sony on board mic would not work for a wedding. Also, where is she sitting? Are you reserving her, her FI and his family a pew that would allow them to sit together but also give her the vantage point she would need?

  
  

  There is nothing wrong with asking her about her pricing and even asking her to give you a package price that does not include editing. But it will impact her ability to be a guest at the wedding. You don't experience things the same way when you are looking through a camera and a video camera requires constant focus on the job - unless you set it on a tripod and let it go. She will not get to enjoy the toasts, dances and cake cutting. She will also have to get up from the table and be paying constant attention to what and when things are happening so she can be ready to start shooting.

  
  

  I have refused over the years to shoot or film friend's weddings. I require that they have a vendor and then I come as a guest and shoot what I feel like shooting. That way if I miss something it isn't an issue. Having a friend do the photos or videos can be very stressful, if anything goes wrong or something doesn't turn out it can be far worse than with an outside vendor. This is why I don't do them and why we didn't hire DH's cousin who is a wedding photographer.
  

  abbyj700 said:

  Eh, we have guests who are vendors. Our DJ is a neighbor and close friend. He would be invited whether he's djing or not. But he happens to DJ, loves doing it, and want to help make our day special. He's getting paid - so he's a vendor. His girlfriend is invited, he'll have a seat with her for when his partner is spinning the tunes, and he'll get the same food and courtesies as any other guest. 

  
  

  I hope this is true of his partner too, as he should be fed as well

  ~xoxo~

  
  

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• ashleyep member

  

  February 2014 edited February 2014

  photokitty said:

  
  

  ******ETA QUOTE BOXES*********************

  
  

  Not to be a negative nelly, but…

  As someone in the industry, but not the wedding portion, it isn't quite the same - it depends on a lot of factors. What does she shoot with? I would never bring my sony video camera to a wedding. I do take my Canon D60, but I don't shot video with it. Sound is another issue…DSLRs don't have built in mics, so there wouldn't be sound unless she brought all that equipment, which you don't just carry around. My Sony on board mic would not work for a wedding. Also, where is she sitting? Are you reserving her, her FI and his family a pew that would allow them to sit together but also give her the vantage point she would need?

  
  

  There is nothing wrong with asking her about her pricing and even asking her to give you a package price that does not include editing. But it will impact her ability to be a guest at the wedding. You don't experience things the same way when you are looking through a camera and a video camera requires constant focus on the job - unless you set it on a tripod and let it go. She will not get to enjoy the toasts, dances and cake cutting. She will also have to get up from the table and be paying constant attention to what and when things are happening so she can be ready to start shooting.

  
  

  I have refused over the years to shoot or film friend's weddings. I require that they have a vendor and then I come as a guest and shoot what I feel like shooting. That way if I miss something it isn't an issue. Having a friend do the photos or videos can be very stressful, if anything goes wrong or something doesn't turn out it can be far worse than with an outside vendor. This why I don't do them and why we didn't hire DH's cousin who is a wedding photographer.
  

  
  

  -------------------------------------------------

  
  

  I asked her about her setup awhile ago out of curiosity. I believe she uses her DSLR, but uses a lavaliere/lapel mic on the guy for the ceremony, and I know she plugs directly into the sound system during the reception.

  
  

  My original plan was to have someone use my DSLR to record (minus any of the sound setup). Like I said, I just want *a* video of that stuff. I don't even care if it's just an iphone (okay, I guess I'd like more than that). But now I'm realizing I'm 5 months out and have no idea who that mythical person would be. 

  
  

  I've used my own camera to record speeches and dances at my cousin's wedding, and it didn't prevent me from enjoying anything. But you're right, I wasn't the pro, and it didn't matter if I didn't get a good shot. I follow some photography forums and they all say not to do it for a friend or family member, but those are usually amateurs who don't have any experience.
  
  But maybe at this point I'll just ask her for a recommendation. I got a quote from a guy that I know second shot video for her at a wedding she did this summer, so I'll ask her about him. Or I'll let FI ask her if he wants since she's his cousin.

  

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• abbyj700 member

  

  February 2014 edited February 2014

  photokitty said:

  ashleyep said:

  I'm pretty sure I already know the answer to this,  but figured I'd ask anyway. We don't really want a videographer at our wedding, but we do want video - that is, I'd pretty much be happy with someone's iphone video of the ceremony/toasts/first dances. Just the key moments, nothing else.

  
  

  My fiancé's cousin is a wedding photographer/videographer. Is it wrong to ask her if she would record those moments for us? We would pay her, of course, but don't really want or need much editing. I know when she just started out she did her step-brothers wedding, but that might have been a different situation because she was just starting her portfolio. 

  
  

  I obviously don't want her to feel like she has to work the whole wedding, but I know she's likely to bring some of her camera equipment with her anyway.

  
  

  What's the etiquette on that? I'm leaning towards no, you shouldn't ask, but I don't know how I would feel if I was in her shoes.

  
  

  
  

  *

  ******ETA QUOTE BOXES*********************

  
  

  Not to be a negative nelly, but…

  As someone in the industry, but not the wedding portion, it isn't quite the same - it depends on a lot of factors. What does she shoot with? I would never bring my sony video camera to a wedding. I do take my Canon D60, but I don't shot video with it. Sound is another issue…DSLRs don't have built in mics, so there wouldn't be sound unless she brought all that equipment, which you don't just carry around. My Sony on board mic would not work for a wedding. Also, where is she sitting? Are you reserving her, her FI and his family a pew that would allow them to sit together but also give her the vantage point she would need?

  
  

  There is nothing wrong with asking her about her pricing and even asking her to give you a package price that does not include editing. But it will impact her ability to be a guest at the wedding. You don't experience things the same way when you are looking through a camera and a video camera requires constant focus on the job - unless you set it on a tripod and let it go. She will not get to enjoy the toasts, dances and cake cutting. She will also have to get up from the table and be paying constant attention to what and when things are happening so she can be ready to start shooting.

  
  

  I have refused over the years to shoot or film friend's weddings. I require that they have a vendor and then I come as a guest and shoot what I feel like shooting. That way if I miss something it isn't an issue. Having a friend do the photos or videos can be very stressful, if anything goes wrong or something doesn't turn out it can be far worse than with an outside vendor. This is why I don't do them and why we didn't hire DH's cousin who is a wedding photographer.
  

  abbyj700 said:

  Eh, we have guests who are vendors. Our DJ is a neighbor and close friend. He would be invited whether he's djing or not. But he happens to DJ, loves doing it, and want to help make our day special. He's getting paid - so he's a vendor. His girlfriend is invited, he'll have a seat with her for when his partner is spinning the tunes, and he'll get the same food and courtesies as any other guest. 

  
  

  I hope this is true of his partner too, as he should be fed as well

  
  

  His partner would be fed either way. He is the only vendor who will be there during the reception who is not also a guest - so we're not even considering a "vendor" meal. Though I don't have issue with the whole "vendor meal" thing like others on here seem to. 

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• climbingsingle member

  

  February 2014

  My aunt is a professional photographer. She's shot weddings for most of my life. There's no way in a million years I would ask her to photograph or record any part of my wedding. Even if she offered, I'd turn her down. I want to her to be a guest, not a vendor. 

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• cowgirl8238 member

  

  February 2014

  abbyj700 said:

  cowgirl8238 said:

  If she is a guest she should not also be vendor.  That would be rude IMO. 

  If she's not intended to be a guest but rather a paid vendor, I would tell her what you;'re looking for and she how much she would charge you.

  Eh, we have guests who are vendors. Our DJ is a neighbor and close friend. He would be invited whether he's djing or not. But he happens to DJ, loves doing it, and want to help make our day special. He's getting paid - so he's a vendor. His girlfriend is invited, he'll have a seat with her for when his partner is spinning the tunes, and he'll get the same food and courtesies as any other guest. 

  
  In the case of a friend it is a little less imposing, but i still think that if you would invite someone as a guest, they should be a guest.  I am not in a field where I would be hired to work at a wedding, but when I get invitied to a wedding, I go beacuse I want to celebrate with my friend!  I think when you have to work at a wedding, you miss on some of the fun because you HAVE to do certain things.  There is a pressure to constantly pay attention, and a responsbility to make things go smoothly.  That doesn't sound like a fun time to me.

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• cowgirl8238 member

  

  February 2014

  ashleyep said:

  cowgirl8238 said:

  If she is a guest she should not also be vendor.  That would be rude IMO. 

  If she's not intended to be a guest but rather a paid vendor, I would tell her what you;'re looking for and she how much she would charge you.

  No, she would be a guest regardless. I know a lot of times family members who work in the wedding industry will help out their friends and families on their wedding day. 

  
  

  I think the rude part would be expecting her to do it for free or at a steep discount. I don't know that there's anything inherently rude with asking, but it would be up to her to decide if she just wants to enjoy the wedding as a guest and not have the responsibility of videoing.

  
  

  My friend is my hairdresser and she'll also be doing my hair for the wedding - and is invited. But that, of course, doesn't require her to work during the ceremony or reception. So it's not really the same scenario.
  
  
  

  
  Instead of asking her directly and putting her on the spot, you could try asking for recomendations.  If she volunteers hereself then good, but if not then I think you have a good indication of if she wants to works through your wedding.

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• abbyj700 member

  

  February 2014 edited February 2014

  cowgirl8238 said: abbyj700 said: cowgirl8238 said: If she is a guest she should not also be vendor.  That would be rude IMO.  If she's not intended to be a guest but rather a paid vendor, I would tell her what you;'re looking for and she how much she would charge you. Eh, we have guests who are vendors. Our DJ is a neighbor and close friend. He would be invited whether he's djing or not. But he happens to DJ, loves doing it, and want to help make our day special. He's getting paid - so he's a vendor. His girlfriend is invited, he'll have a seat with her for when his partner is spinning the tunes, and he'll get the same food and courtesies as any other guest. 
  In the case of a friend it is a little less imposing, but i still think that if you would invite someone as a guest, they should be a guest.  I am not in a field where I would be hired to work at a wedding, but when I get invitied to a wedding, I go beacuse I want to celebrate with my friend!  I think when you have to work at a wedding, you miss on some of the fun because you HAVE to do certain things.  There is a pressure to constantly pay attention, and a responsbility to make things go smoothly.  That doesn't sound like a fun time to me.
  
  ******* stupid box********
  Yeah - doesn't sound like fun to you. But this is their choice. It's what they want to do. 

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