Trouble with wedding party :x

Re: Trouble with wedding party :x

• AddieCake member

  

  March 2014

  moegleason said:

  I am having issues with some of the people in the wedding party not taking it seriously about booking their flight and hotel rooms for the day before the wedding to make it to the rehearsal and the wedding is the following day. Our wedding is on March 29th, so we are only 27 days away from the big day.

  
  

  Any tips on how to not come across as being a pest, but make sure that everyone is still going to be committed to traveling for the wedding.

  
  

  Please note, we have been planning on having our wedding in Colorado for over 13 months and everyone in our wedding party was asked if they would be able to be in the wedding party (including that they would need to be able to travel) around the same time.
  

  
  I would contact them and say you need final numbers for the caterer. And then let it go. If they don't come, they have taken themselves out of the wedding. How do you know they haven't booked yet?

  What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14

  

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• wisegirl14 member

  

  March 2014

  My fiance and I had finished doing our walk through at the venue and when we returned home from Colorado we asked everyone what time they were getting in (if they needed us to pick them up from the airport) and where they were staying so we could finalize our plans and transportation for the rehearsal and for the day of the wedding. When we asked, some of them said they had not booked their flight or hotel yet and some have booked their flight, but not their hotel.

  

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• MyNameIsNot member

  

  March 2014

  Just let it go.  They are adults.  They know how to buy plane tickets and book hotels.  If they book last minute and don't get a good deal, that's their problem.  

  
  

  If they don't book a flight and don't make it, they don't make it.  Reminding them is not going to change that.  People don't just forget to book a flight.  If they don't book, it's because they decided not to come.  

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• JoanE2012 member

  

  March 2014 edited March 2014

  moegleason said:

  I am having issues with some of the people in the wedding party not taking it seriously about booking their flight and hotel rooms for the day before the wedding to make it to the rehearsal and the wedding is the following day. Our wedding is on March 29th, so we are only 27 days away from the big day.

  
  

  Any tips on how to not come across as being a pest, but make sure that everyone is still going to be committed to traveling for the wedding.

  
  

  Please note, we have been planning on having our wedding in Colorado for over 13 months and everyone in our wedding party was asked if they would be able to be in the wedding party (including that they would need to be able to travel) around the same time.
  

  Well, if they don't book, they just won't be there and be in the wedding.  Don't nag them though.  They're adults.

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• wisegirl14 member

  

  March 2014

  Yeah, I only asked them the one time after we got back and now I am just pretty much leaving it alone. If they ask for help I would be more than happy to help them get everything done.

  
  

  
  

  

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• mysticl member

  

  March 2014

  It might be they have some work stuff they need to figure out before they can book their flights.  

  

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• aurianna member

  

  March 2014

  MyNameIsNot said:

  Just let it go.  They are adults.  They know how to buy plane tickets and book hotels.  If they book last minute and don't get a good deal, that's their problem.  

  
  

  If they don't book a flight and don't make it, they don't make it.  Reminding them is not going to change that.  People don't just forget to book a flight.  If they don't book, it's because they decided not to come.  

  Funny story... I totally did that once. I swore I booked a flight for a NYE wedding in Chicago. A few days before the wedding I was trying to find my flight info in my email and couldn't... whoops!
  Luckily we're in St. Louis so we just drove to the wedding instead.
  
  But yeah, after the latest reminder, that should be enough to get their butts in gear. I think you've done all you need to, aside from getting getting the final headcount of the WP and their SO's for the rehearsal dinner if you need a firm number, but I assume you don't need that number yet.
  

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• OliveOilsMom member

  

  March 2014

  Also, don't worry about the rehearsal.  Unless you are having a super compilcated ceremony, it's not necessary for the WP to attend the rehearsal.  My MOH couldn't attend mine, but she walked down the aisle and stood in the right spot when it was time for the vows. It all worked out fine.  If you need final numbers for the restaurant the rehearsal is in, one week prior should be sufficient.  So wait until 7 days before the wedding then ask the WP if they are coming to the rehersal and if they are bringing anyone to the RD.

  

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• HisGirlFriday13 member

  

  March 2014

  Ditto PPs on not worrying about the rehearsal. We had a full Catholic Mass, and only one member of the WP (my MOH) was Catholic. The only people who attended the 'rehearsal' were my brother (who played the music) and my SIL (a BM); my nephew (an RB), and two of DH's GM. 

  
  

  Everyone else -- including DH's brother and the brother's son, our other RB, skipped the rehearsal, and everyone still managed to get down the aisle and situated properly.

  

  
  

  
  

  I'm gonna go with 'not my circus, not my monkeys.'

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• lc07 member

  

  March 2014

  Leave it alone, OP. If your guests and WP have RSVPd yes to your invitations you can assume they are coming and making travel arrangements. If they RSVP no or have not RSVPd then there is a discussion to be had.

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• wisegirl14 member

  

  March 2014

  Thank you for all the advice. Yes, I have let it go and haven't brought it up since the one conversation. Several of the people in the wedding party have called my fiance updating us on their travel plans, so now almost all, but one person, have made their travel arrangements.

  
  

  But yes, my final head count for the wedding is due next week so I just wanted to confirm with everyone before submitting those numbers to the venue and catering.

  

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