One of my bridesmaids volunteered to throw me my bachelorette party! Great right?
Except that it's turning into a disaster.
She never got a list of people from me who I wanted invited, and instead tried doing it all on facebook. She is not facebook friends with a lot of the people so she ended up having to add me to the group in order to invite them.
I'm so stressed out about it because she apparently never set a budget up with people first. She asked me what I wanted to do, and I said that wine tasting in a limo would be fun. Except that she never got a headcount, a budget from people, or any ideas from my MOH or other bridesmaid about what they would suggest for me.
Instead she started texting me constantly asking me about all the planning options. Then when I tried telling her to please ask the people attending these questions, because I cannot answer for them, or to please ask the MOH or Bridesmaid, she wouldn't do it.
She booked everything and completely ignored any suggestions that anyone had made. She booked an expensive lunch when I already suggested a limo company that has a deli tray and breads in the limo so that we don't have to buy lunch. Then she insisted on dinner being planned. Like full on harrassed me about it constantly texting me for an hour last week all about it and then actually asked me if it was okay to bring her boyfriend and her children to the dinner. I said no that I did not think it was appropriate to have them there.
Now people are posting on the fb group asking for price totals and she is ignoring them. She backed out of dinner and isn't coming to it now.
I'm just super frustrated because I know I am not supposed to be involved, and tried to get her to stop asking me things, but she is planning this crazy thing that is not anything like what I mentioned "might be nice". I never said hey we have to do this! She could have easily asked other people for ideas, or asked me for some ideas that I had of things I would like to do.
I am grateful that someone is trying to plan something, but if it's so expensive that no one can afford to come, then I would rather not do that! I have expressed this to her many times and she just ignores me and keeps telling me that people can suck it up because it's "your day and they can just do what you want"
Which is completely NOT the attitude that I have about this all.
She put the deposit in on the limo already, even though there were no concrete numbers. Then she texted me and said that she has to raise the price per person, and that she's "already absorbing a lot of money in costs so she can't afford not to raise it"...uhh okay? Why is she telling me this? I don't know what in the world could possibly so expensive unless she is adding on all kinds of crazy options.
People are already revolting because she added on a lunch at a winery and it's an extra amount of money on top of the other expenses and she never presented it as a "hey maybe we could do this, who is interested?" it was more like a "hey I signed us up for this, so pick what you want and oh by the way you owe this extra amount now!"
One of the guests just ate there on her birthday and was trying nicely to tell her that it was not worth the money at all and that we could easily go somewhere else, or just eat the food provided by the limo company. But she refuses to listen to anyone about it.
I was crying yesterday because I'm so stressed out about this. For one thing, I'm not even supposed to be involved in planning, yet she will not leave me alone about it! Secondly, I already made it clear that I don't want people being charged an arm and a leg to hang out with me and she just keeps ignoring that. She already made it so expensive that 3 people dropped out. and I think more are going to.
I just don't understand why something that is not that difficult to plan has turned into a total nightmare. She also was trying to switch the date after she already made it on one day, to another, because she had a work conference the day before. This was after guests had already RSVPd, and people had asked for the time off from work.
I just wish I could cancel the whole thing because I feel awful about how it has turned out.
At this point I feel like she is planning some dream bachelorette party for herself or what she "thinks one should be" rather than what I would actually want.