I think I will be wishing for cloudy weather.

climbingsingle · March 2014

FI, my mom and my dad all have transition lenses. If we have the ceremony outside, it will all look like they are all wearing sunglasses. Same with taking pictures outside - our venue is gorgeous and has this amazing flower garden. I won't be able to see FI's eyes during the ceremony either.

FI won't wear his contacts because they hurt his eyes. When I brought up buying some cheap regular lenses to put into his frames for the day, he said no. Having him go completely without his glasses won't work either.

All of this is really pissing me off. I know if you have to ask a question, the answer is usually yes. I'm being a Bridezilla, aren't I?

grumbledore · March 2014

I worried about outdoor photos until we decided on a late afternoon ceremony in November - I have blue eyes and am very, very sensitive to sunlight. I'd be squinting if we took outdoor photos in the sun! It might be a little BZ, but I get it - I think transition lenses, as practical as they are, always look super dorky.

pumpkinsandturkeys · March 2014

Personally, I really dislike the look of the transition lenses.

So, while it may be a BZ moment, I totally understand where you're coming from.

Has he tried other types of contacts? There are so many types and brands out there, especially for hyper-sensitive eyes. It might be worth exploring the options if he's not able to go without.

I also get him not wanting to spend the money on another set of lenses, but it IS helpful to have a spare pair of glasses laying around in case anything happens to your main frames. Maybe you could position it this way? If anything did happen to his transitions, it sounds as though it would be really beneficial for him to have a backup pair.

climbingsingle · March 2014

I'm so glad you guys understand. I have green eyes that are super sensitive to light too. So I get it. But I hate these lenses!

FI is usually a very reasonable person. This is one thing he just won't budge on. My mom brought it up when we were all together last night and he was like, "I'm wearing my regular glasses. That's it."

AprilH81 · March 2014

My dad has transition lenses (and he is sensitive to light because he has blue eyes). His glasses change over even on cloudy days...

HisGirlFriday13 · March 2014

I don't think you're being BZ at all. I have green eyes, super-sensitive to light, and I always, always, always wear sunglasses outside, even in winter.

I was glad our day was slightly overcast, because it meant I wasn't squinting in the sunshine.

I'm sorry your FI is being unreasonable. Can you frame it to him in the context of wanting to see his face/eyes when you walk down the aisle and say your vows?

That was how DH framed it when he said, 'No veil over your face. I want to see you as you're walking toward me.' I ended up not wearing a veil at all, so it was a moot point.

climbingsingle · March 2014

I just realized something - this whole transition lens thing could help my case with doing a first look!

I think I'm going to keep chipping away at him. I want him to look like himself, which is why I want him in glasses. And I really don't think it's that big of a deal to get him cheap regular lenses to wear for the day.

Maybe I can have our photographer talk to him.

climbingsingle · March 2014

AprilH81 said:

My dad has transition lenses (and he is sensitive to light because he has blue eyes). His glasses change over even on cloudy days...

Nuts! You're right. I think they do turn even on cloudy days.

AprilH81 · March 2014

ClimbingBrideNY said:

AprilH81 said:

My dad has transition lenses (and he is sensitive to light because he has blue eyes). His glasses change over even on cloudy days...
Nuts! You're right. I think they do turn even on cloudy days.

Plus they take awhile to transition back once you get inside... I would urge him to get a "regular" set of glasses for the wedding day so he still looks like himself but that people can see his eyes.

cruffino · March 2014

I think is one of those things where you've got to accept his comfort over the pictures. You may not like the look, but in the end it doesn't matter.

DH wears transition lenses, but he also regularly wears contacts. He chose contacts for the wedding. Totally his decision.

princessleia22 · March 2014

If you can convince him to get some regular lenses for the day, check out ZenniOptical.com. They have some really good prices for glasses. I bought my glasses there for $50 (including extra charge for super thin polycarbonate lenses). The downside is that you can't try them on ahead of time, but if you get shape/style similar to what he already wears, it shouldn't be a problem. Or maybe get sneaky and just buy him a pair very similar to his current ones, then you can say, "well, since they are already here, maybe you could wear them or at least try them on and see what you think?"... even if just for photos opportunities. Of course, that could also cause problems since it sounds like he's pretty definitively said he's wearing the transitions and is not open to other options.

My FI has been trying to get me to do laser corrective surgery before the wedding to get rid of the glasses. I'm not opposed to the idea, but I'm hesitant to add to our expenses when we are currently spending all our money on the wedding and some other medical expenses that came up. I have contacts, but I only wear them for special occasions because they bug my eyes and start getting uncomfortable after a couple hours. My issue with wearing them for wedding is that it will be a long day and I know they will be uncomfortable long before I'm able to take them out. And I really don't want to have bloodshot, scratchy eyes in my wedding photos. I'm not really opposed to wearing my glasses for the wedding, because that's my normal, everyday look. But FI has made it clear that he really would prefer I not wear glasses for the wedding and either do surgery or contacts. So, I'm still undecided on this one for myself.

ElcaB · March 2014

I was going to suggest the same thing as @Nicoann. I have four pairs of glasses from Zenni and spent less than $100 total.

AprilH81 · March 2014

nicoann said:

If you can convince him to get some regular lenses for the day, check out ZenniOptical.com. They have some really good prices for glasses. I bought my glasses there for $50 (including extra charge for super thin polycarbonate lenses). The downside is that you can't try them on ahead of time, but if you get shape/style similar to what he already wears, it shouldn't be a problem. Or maybe get sneaky and just buy him a pair very similar to his current ones, then you can say, "well, since they are already here, maybe you could wear them or at least try them on and see what you think?"... even if just for photos opportunities. Of course, that could also cause problems since it sounds like he's pretty definitively said he's wearing the transitions and is not open to other options.

My FI has been trying to get me to do laser corrective surgery before the wedding to get rid of the glasses. I'm not opposed to the idea, but I'm hesitant to add to our expenses when we are currently spending all our money on the wedding and some other medical expenses that came up. I have contacts, but I only wear them for special occasions because they bug my eyes and start getting uncomfortable after a couple hours. My issue with wearing them for wedding is that it will be a long day and I know they will be uncomfortable long before I'm able to take them out. And I really don't want to have bloodshot, scratchy eyes in my wedding photos. I'm not really opposed to wearing my glasses for the wedding, because that's my normal, everyday look. But FI has made it clear that he really would prefer I not wear glasses for the wedding and either do surgery or contacts. So, I'm still undecided on this one for myself.

Can you wear your glasses up until the last minute and then put in the contacts for pictures and the ceremony? Then you can step out of the reception at some pont to take them out if you need to.

mysticl · March 2014

AprilH81 said:

nicoann said:

If you can convince him to get some regular lenses for the day, check out ZenniOptical.com. They have some really good prices for glasses. I bought my glasses there for $50 (including extra charge for super thin polycarbonate lenses). The downside is that you can't try them on ahead of time, but if you get shape/style similar to what he already wears, it shouldn't be a problem. Or maybe get sneaky and just buy him a pair very similar to his current ones, then you can say, "well, since they are already here, maybe you could wear them or at least try them on and see what you think?"... even if just for photos opportunities. Of course, that could also cause problems since it sounds like he's pretty definitively said he's wearing the transitions and is not open to other options.

My FI has been trying to get me to do laser corrective surgery before the wedding to get rid of the glasses. I'm not opposed to the idea, but I'm hesitant to add to our expenses when we are currently spending all our money on the wedding and some other medical expenses that came up. I have contacts, but I only wear them for special occasions because they bug my eyes and start getting uncomfortable after a couple hours. My issue with wearing them for wedding is that it will be a long day and I know they will be uncomfortable long before I'm able to take them out. And I really don't want to have bloodshot, scratchy eyes in my wedding photos. I'm not really opposed to wearing my glasses for the wedding, because that's my normal, everyday look. But FI has made it clear that he really would prefer I not wear glasses for the wedding and either do surgery or contacts. So, I'm still undecided on this one for myself.

Can you wear your glasses up until the last minute and then put in the contacts for pictures and the ceremony? Then you can step out of the reception at some pont to take them out if you need to.

You're supposed to put them in prior to putting on make up so you don't get any on the lenses in the process. I know my make up was done about 2 hours prior to walking down the aisle.

I was the opposite. I had run out of contacts due to a lack of insurance (I needed an eye exam before I could order new ones) and DH was like "just wear your glasses". I would have insurance once we got married. I told him I hate to be seen wearing my glasses and would not get married in them. I feel very ugly wearing them. So he got me a very basic eye exam and contacts.

I really want the surgery. DH had it before we met.

phira · March 2014

Haha, after reading the original post, I was like, "Okay, I'll read all the replies and then recommend Zenni Optical." J lost his $400 brand new pair of glasses last winter; he needs them to watch any TV or movies, and he was about to start winter break (when he'd be watching lots of TV and movies). ZO was great; it cost $40 and we got the glasses super quickly. They're great if you want lots of extra pairs of medium-quality glasses.

I also can't staaaand transition lenses in photos because if you're outside, it always looks like everyone's wearing sunglasses. And, I mean, maybe you want to wear sunglasses when you're having your wedding photos taken, but honestly, it's so distracting. This is not a bridezilla moment in my opinion.

KeptInStitches · March 2014

Holy cow, they fill strong prescriptions! From a lurker on this thread, thank you! I might go to them for my next pair of glasses, provided my opthamologist is confident in my prescription (he's not always, but he's really good and absolutely nailed it last time when he was nervous).

princessleia22 · March 2014

AprilH81 said:

nicoann said:

If you can convince him to get some regular lenses for the day, check out ZenniOptical.com. They have some really good prices for glasses. I bought my glasses there for $50 (including extra charge for super thin polycarbonate lenses). The downside is that you can't try them on ahead of time, but if you get shape/style similar to what he already wears, it shouldn't be a problem. Or maybe get sneaky and just buy him a pair very similar to his current ones, then you can say, "well, since they are already here, maybe you could wear them or at least try them on and see what you think?"... even if just for photos opportunities. Of course, that could also cause problems since it sounds like he's pretty definitively said he's wearing the transitions and is not open to other options.

My FI has been trying to get me to do laser corrective surgery before the wedding to get rid of the glasses. I'm not opposed to the idea, but I'm hesitant to add to our expenses when we are currently spending all our money on the wedding and some other medical expenses that came up. I have contacts, but I only wear them for special occasions because they bug my eyes and start getting uncomfortable after a couple hours. My issue with wearing them for wedding is that it will be a long day and I know they will be uncomfortable long before I'm able to take them out. And I really don't want to have bloodshot, scratchy eyes in my wedding photos. I'm not really opposed to wearing my glasses for the wedding, because that's my normal, everyday look. But FI has made it clear that he really would prefer I not wear glasses for the wedding and either do surgery or contacts. So, I'm still undecided on this one for myself.

Can you wear your glasses up until the last minute and then put in the contacts for pictures and the ceremony? Then you can step out of the reception at some pont to take them out if you need to.

I've debated that one too, but it gets more complicated since I'm having a destination wedding. I'm doing hair & makeup at hotel about 8am, need to be at venue at 10am, wedding is at 1pm, reception 1:30-3:30pm, then my wedding photos will be at around 5pm, then dinner with wedding party at 8pm. So, I've got a very long day and I'm not sure if I'll have many opportunities to change them out. If I do opt to wear contacts, I will probably keep my glasses and contact case somewhere handy (like FI's coat pocket) so I can take them out if needed and maybe find a way to put them back in for photos later.

princessleia22 · March 2014

KeptInStitches said:

Holy cow, they fill strong prescriptions! From a lurker on this thread, thank you! I might go to them for my next pair of glasses, provided my opthamologist is confident in my prescription (he's not always, but he's really good and absolutely nailed it last time when he was nervous).

I know... my prescription is pretty bad, too. There is additional charge for worse prescriptions, but it's not much (for me it was $16). Their prices are so good that I bought prescription sunglasses. Plus, I've taken chances on buying a style I wasn't sure about, figuring it didn't cost too much anyway... luckily I ended up loving them.

I originally heard about Zenni from a friend of a friend who has several pairs of glasses in various colors & styles to match whatever outfit she's wearing that day.

phira · March 2014

I don't really think anyone should feel pressured to look differently than they normally do for their wedding day. So if you normally wear glasses, I feel like ... well, wear glasses! But transition lenses are a bit different, because it's like you're constantly wearing half sunglasses.

climbingsingle · March 2014

Good news! I talked to FI about it again this weekend. He's going to wear his contacts but will put in non-prescription/non-transition lenses into his glasses. He says he totally understands that I want to be able to see his eyes. Woo hoo!

sarahufl · March 2014

Glad you solved the problem, but FTR- you weren't being a BZ.

Also, Lasik was the best decision I have ever made. I would suggest it to anyone!

arrippa · March 2014

@nicoann Thanks for the ZenniOptical suggestion. Now I have a new place to spend all my money.

I think I will be wishing for cloudy weather.

Re: I think I will be wishing for cloudy weather.

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