Invitation Wording Ceremony after a Private Marriage

ebev85 · March 2014

My fiance and I will be getting married in a private ceremony with our pastor in March. Our ceremony (at the church) and reception will be held in May. I am looking for advice on wording as we will already be married but looking to share our vows with family and friends. I don't feel comfortable calling it a vow renewal as the dates are only two months apart, but we do want to indicate to guests that this is our formal ceremony. Thoughts?

AddieCake · March 2014

What is the point of renewing your vows 2 months later?

ebev85 · March 2014

We will not have shared our vows with anyone but our pastor and each other. It is important to us to share our vows with our family and friends in God's house. I understand all of the negative view points on getting married and having the ceremony later but this is what we are doing and I am looking for advice on appropriate wording for our invitations.

doeydo · March 2014

ebev85 said:

We will not have shared our vows with anyone but our pastor and each other. It is important to us to share our vows with our family and friends in God's house. I understand all of the negative view points on getting married and having the ceremony later but this is what we are doing and I am looking for advice on appropriate wording for our invitations.

If it is important to share your vows with your family and friends in a place of worship, why not just do that when you get married?

ebev85 · March 2014

A majority of our family is out of town and we scheduled our ceremony at the church as soon as we could with allowing enough time for them to make travel arrangements.

Again, I am asking for advice on wording for our invitations. I've read all of the concerns/opinions that people have about getting married and then having a wedding. I understand your view points; however that is not what we are doing at this point.

CMGragain · March 2014

i am very sorry, but you only get ONE wedding day. It is the day when you legally become a married couple.
If you want your friends and family to "share" (?) in your vows, you need to invite them to your wedding. Then you must have a reception for them afterwards.
Any repeat of your vows IS a vow renewal. This is the definition of vow renewal, whether you do it that same day, or twenty years from now. You ARE planning a vow renewal, not a wedding reception. I'm sorry if you don't like it, but this is the truth.
Here is a good site for vow renewal planning:http://www.idotaketwo.com/renewing_wedding_vows.html

Mr. and Mrs. Already Married
request the pleasure of your company
as they reaffirm their marriage vows
Day, Date
time o'clock
Venue
Address
City, State

ebev85 · March 2014

Never mind. I'll figure it out on my own.

CMGragain · March 2014

OP, if you want to have a reception, without the renewal of vows, that would be easier. The reason that you are having trouble wording your invitation is that having two wedding ceremonies isn't the right thing to do. You are having a private church ceremony. Wonderful! Congratulations! At that point in time you should send out wedding announcements to everybody.

Bride's Full Name
and
Groom's Full Name
announce their marriage
Date
City, State

Then at a later time, you can send out invitations to your celebration. No vows, please. You will be a married woman, not a bride. No big white wedding dress or bridesmaids. You may choose to have a very formal celebration if you wish, with dinner, dancing, open bar, toasts, but don't try to make it into a second wedding. If you do, it becomes what we call a PPD (Pretty Princess Day) which means a fake wedding. (Ew! Ick!) Here is wording for a celebration of your original wedding:

The pleasure of your company is requested
to celebrate the recent marriage of
Bride's Full Name
and
Groom's Full Name
Day, Date (of party)
time o'clock
Venue
Address
City, State

I am very familiar with the etiquette on this. Elopements and private ceremonies are the norm with my extended family. I hope I helped you.

ebev85 · March 2014

The reception and party are not what I am concerned about. What is important to us is sharing our marriage with our family and friends in God's house and sharing our beliefs about how we want our marriage to be supported. We are doing this ASAP as our living situation will be changing and we want to enter into our marriage in a God pleasing way. No one needs to have the white dress and all the extras that go along with what weddings are these days, people make those choices. It is important for us to share our vows in front of our family and friends and if we could get them all here ASAP we would. It's just not possible at this point. Not all marriages need to be celebrated in the same way. Again, while I appreciate the comments I really just need help wording my invites to accurately show what type of event the guests are being invited to.

CMGragain · March 2014

I totally understand and sympathize. I am an active church lady.
I think the last post I made shows you your best choice. You cannot call it a wedding, because you are already married. I think you should own that and have a great celebration for your friends and family later on.
Congratulations on your upcoming wedding. What does your pastor say about this? Many pastors wouldn't allow this unless it was acknowledged as a vow renewal.
Is it possible to call it a marriage blessing? But your marriage will have already been blessed by the church.

ebev85 · March 2014

He is supporting our early marriage and allowing us to follow the traditional marriage ceremony in the hymnal with a few tweaks to acknowledge our early marriage. It's more of a public sharing of our vows as he said but I'm still not sure how to write that on the invite.

CMGragain · March 2014

I would call it a "reaffirmation" of your vows. You will be reaffirming them in front of your friends and family. Check out my first post wording. Here is an alternative:

The honour of your presence is requested
to celebrate the recent marriage of
Bride's Full Name
and
Groom's Full Name
as they reaffirm their marriage vows
Day, date
time o'clock
Church Name
Address
City, State

Reception to follow

doeydo · March 2014

So you two want to move in together and will be having sex, I presume, and therefor want to get married sooner rather than later. You also want to get married in church in front of all your friends of family. I think you can do that. Just do a simple cake and punch reception or something afterwards (make sure the wedding is not in a meal-time, though, or else you would have to serve a meal) to save money.

princessleia22 · March 2014

CMGragain said:

I would call it a "reaffirmation" of your vows. You will be reaffirming them in front of your friends and family. Check out my first post wording. Here is an alternative:

The honour of your presence is requested
to celebrate the recent marriage of
Bride's Full Name
and
Groom's Full Name
as they reaffirm their marriage vows
Day, date
time o'clock
Church Name
Address
City, State

Reception to follow

I think this is the best option

Invitation Wording Ceremony after a Private Marriage

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