Is this a thing...

LakeR2014 · March 2014

...Bride suggested throwing a Pampered Chef Shower? The idea just left be feeling uncomfortable and with a foul taste in my mouth. I was able to sidestep the suggestion and she has since decided she wanted something more traditional, but the idea was brought to her by someone else who had one. Is this a thing? How does it work if those parties are usually things where you're asked/suggested to buy things to help the host get free things?

HisGirlFriday13 · March 2014

Anymore, NOTHING surprises me as being touted as 'a thing' -- this included. I mean, why shouldn't the hostess of a party get free stuff (that she's probably then expected to give to the bride as part of the shower gift) in exchange for hosting a shower hawking over-priced kitchen gadgets? /sarcasm.

I don't mind general theme showers (most of the ones I've been to recently have been kitchen-themed, and we've been asked to fill out a recipe card that was included with the shower invitation), because showers tend to be for home goods anyway, and I love, love, LOVE buying kitchen stuff. (Our registry was probably 90 percent kitchen gadgets/stuff/accoutrements and 10 percent everything else).

But I would side-eye this hard-core. Because, what, you're expected to show up at a shower (a gift-giving event) empty-handed, then buy something the bride wants from a catalogue, so everyone else knows exactly how much you spent? No. Hella tacky.

Inkdancer · March 2014

That would make me super uncomfortable. I hate "buy this stuff" parties anyway, because your friends shouldn't pressure you to spend money, but it's even weirder when it's "buy this stuff and give it to me."

Decline, decline, decline.

emmyg65 · March 2014

I would believe this is a thing, because these days, everything is. But I'm glad you dissuaded her.

FWIW, I don't attend any of these parties; multi-level marketing is just a fancy word for Ponzi scheme. Plus, it's so rude to hit up your friends for money.

ElcaB · March 2014

Inkdancer said:

That would make me super uncomfortable. I hate "buy this stuff" parties anyway, because your friends shouldn't pressure you to spend money, but it's even weirder when it's "buy this stuff and give it to me."

Decline, decline, decline.

Nailed it.

anjuli116 · March 2014

I went to a friend's Pampered Chef party right after I got engaged and the lady running it tried to get me interested in a Pampered Chef shower. Based on the description, that was an immediate no in my book. Apparently they put up a bulletin board with pictures of Pampered Chef registry items pinned to it. People go up to the board and unpin photos, then hand them to you to say they are buying you that thing.

On top of the general awkwardness and the rudeness of essentially pressuring people to buy off that registry, there's the added pressure of everyone watching as each guest makes the decision of how much they can spend. And what if you're the last one to the board and all the reasonably-priced stuff is taken? I just can't see a situation where this isn't rude.

LakeR2014 · March 2014

anjuli116 said:

I went to a friend's Pampered Chef party right after I got engaged and the lady running it tried to get me interested in a Pampered Chef shower. Based on the description, that was an immediate no in my book. Apparently they put up a bulletin board with pictures of Pampered Chef registry items pinned to it. People go up to the board and unpin photos, then hand them to you to say they are buying you that thing.

On top of the general awkwardness and the rudeness of essentially pressuring people to buy off that registry, there's the added pressure of everyone watching as each guest makes the decision of how much they can spend. And what if you're the last one to the board and all the reasonably-priced stuff is taken? I just can't see a situation where this isn't rude.

@anjuli116 Wow! It just sounds even more horrible then I thought! Yuck!

antoto · March 2014

OH GOD is THAT what that is? Sweet baby jesus that is awful. Side eye.

MrsMack10612 · March 2014

As a former PChef consultant, it's not quite as awful as it sounds. I don't agree with them and didn't push them, but it really isn't any different than a traditional registry. The big difference is the method of procurement.

It's done as a home party, but the guests have the registry in front of them; the bride then gets the "host" points that normally go along with any home party. No different really than when you get your completion discount from BBB or C&B.

Again, I didn't think it was right, it was too much "on the spot" for guests, but overall the general idea isn't that different than traditional.

ETA: I didn't know a single consultant that did the bulletin board thing. Everyone I knew handled it much more low key offering the guests a printed list of what the bride had chosen and then your purchase was done privately away from the rest of the crowd, so you didn't have that awkwardness.

antoto · March 2014

Plus with this you don't have ribbons for a ribbon bouquet. And I LOVED my ribbon bouquet.

Inkdancer · March 2014

antoto said:

Plus with this you don't have ribbons for a ribbon bouquet. And I LOVED my ribbon bouquet.

Here we do ribbon hats. And let me tell you, I love me some ridiculous hats!

emmyg65 · March 2014

Inkdancer said:

antoto said:

Plus with this you don't have ribbons for a ribbon bouquet. And I LOVED my ribbon bouquet.

Here we do ribbon hats. And let me tell you, I love me some ridiculous hats!

True story: I opted out of a shower, and my only regret was that I missed the ribbon bouquet or hat!

tammym1001 · March 2014

I kind of like the idea that I could buy the bride something she wanted and then she would also get the hostess credit and be able to get additional things. My friends and I do home parties a lot though so I don't think they are weird. The only thing I don't like is that the price of all the registry items are right there in front of everyone and they would know exactly how much you spent. At least with a traditional registry you could use coupons or whatever and maybe get an item that was more expensive, but not have paid as much for it.

anjuli116 · March 2014

MrsMack10612 said:

As a former PChef consultant, it's not quite as awful as it sounds. I don't agree with them and didn't push them, but it really isn't any different than a traditional registry. The big difference is the method of procurement.

It's done as a home party, but the guests have the registry in front of them; the bride then gets the "host" points that normally go along with any home party. No different really than when you get your completion discount from BBB or C&B.

Again, I didn't think it was right, it was too much "on the spot" for guests, but overall the general idea isn't that different than traditional.

ETA: I didn't know a single consultant that did the bulletin board thing. Everyone I knew handled it much more low key offering the guests a printed list of what the bride had chosen and then your purchase was done privately away from the rest of the crowd, so you didn't have that awkwardness.

I suppose that is somewhat better than the crazy bulletin board thing, but I still feel like there's a distinct difference between "Let's shower the bride with gifts. If you're not sure what to get, here's a list of things the couple has said they'd find useful." and "Let's shower the bride with gifts the must come from this limited catalog and will arrive at a later date." The consultant who talked to me was probably in the minority, but dang, she sure did talk about that bulletin board as if I ought to think it was brilliant.

That said, I do really like Pampered Chef's stuff. I think I'd be more inclined to just have a registry through them, amongst others, and people could use it if they wish.

@Inkdancer Please tell me how one makes these hats. My family went overboard with ribbon, and I think I want a hat now too.

kmmssg · March 2014

MrsMack10612 said:

As a former PChef consultant, it's not quite as awful as it sounds. I don't agree with them and didn't push them, but it really isn't any different than a traditional registry. The big difference is the method of procurement.

It's done as a home party, but the guests have the registry in front of them; the bride then gets the "host" points that normally go along with any home party. No different really than when you get your completion discount from BBB or C&B.

Again, I didn't think it was right, it was too much "on the spot" for guests, but overall the general idea isn't that different than traditional.

ETA: I didn't know a single consultant that did the bulletin board thing. Everyone I knew handled it much more low key offering the guests a printed list of what the bride had chosen and then your purchase was done privately away from the rest of the crowd, so you didn't have that awkwardness.

And....the PC rep is making money on the whole thing.

If you aren't going to spend a lot on a shower gift a PC party wouldn't be the way to go because the gadgety stuff will be scooped up and you are left with really expensive pots/pans/bakeware/dishes.

These really put people on the spot. If you can only spend 30 or 40 dollars at a PC party your gift will be quite small. I think these are deplorable.

Inkdancer · March 2014

@anjuli116
Step 1: Take a circle of paper or a paper plate and punch 2 small circles in the sides.
Step 2: Thread a long ribbon through the holes to tie it onto your head, and then cover the top with all the ribbons that you took off your wrapped gifts.
Step 3: Laugh your butt off because you look like a goober.

Inkdancer · March 2014

If it works, this is a pic of my friend in her ribbon hat.

ETA: @jdluvr06 This is a ribbon hat.

Kauris · March 2014

I went to a bachelorette party that was a sex toy party too. We were sent off to a different room one by one so we could buy the bride some stuff for her honeymoon. Needless to say I was more than a little eeeked out by this. How weird is that? {Shudder}

Inkdancer · March 2014

kasmith1 said:

I went to a bachelorette party that was a sex toy party too. We were sent off to a different room one by one so we could buy the bride some stuff for her honeymoon. Needless to say I was more than a little eeeked out by this. How weird is that? {Shudder}

GUH! I am pretty open about sex but NO WAY would I buy that kind of thing for a friend, especially when coerced to do so. Gross.

jdluvr06 · March 2014

What is a ribbon hat or bouquet? I've never heard of that.

anjuli116 · March 2014

@Inkdancer Had to get to a real computer for it to show up, but that is glorious! Good thing I kept all that ribbon. This is totally happening.

@kasmith1 Someone suggested one of those parties to me too. As if opening lingerie from my grandma in front of my future in-laws wasn't bad enough. No way, no how!

Kauris · March 2014

anjuli116 said:

@kasmith1 Someone suggested one of those parties to me too. As if opening lingerie from my grandma in front of my future in-laws wasn't bad enough. No way, no how!

Yeah, if lingerie was bad, this was worse. Think FULL out sex toys, lubricant, a stripper pole; think anything you could find in a sex shop. THAT's what they were passing around and selling. It's even worse than you what you experienced. Way, way worse.

@Inkdancer - Yes, I'm so glad I am not friends with that girl any more. She was awful.

mintberry · March 2014

jdluvr06 said:

What is a ribbon hat or bouquet? I've never heard of that.

I loved my ribbon hat so I thought I'd share

Inkdancer · March 2014

mintelis said:

jdluvr06 said:

What is a ribbon hat or bouquet? I've never heard of that.

I loved my ribbon hat so I thought I'd share

Magnifique!

theartistformerlyknownas · March 2014

1) OMG I NEED A RIBBON HAT!

2) step sister is having a sex toy bachelorette party. Yuck yuck yuck. Just SO much no. (PS this is taking place at a house where 25+ people are expected to stay the weekend for a $50 entrance fee each which includes the rental and "party favors." Um if I'm paying for it, it's not a "favor." And I know I'd end up sleeping on the floor. No thank you.) /endrant

sarahufl · March 2014

Buying Tupperware at parties, I can get behind. Sex toys? Not so much.

JennyColada · March 2014

I am a huge foodie and love buying kitchen gadgets, but I hate hate HATE PC parties. They are so pushy and the reps always basically jump down your throat to host your own parties. Tacky and awkward. Plus, I'm super rude and open tell the rep "no, I'm not interested in the overpriced crap that you're selling and I find it rude that I already told you that I don't want to host a party and you keep asking me" and thus embarrass all of my friends (so they kind of don't even bother to invite me anymore, which I'm fine with).

smalfrie19 · March 2014

Jennycolada said:

I am a huge foodie and love buying kitchen gadgets, but I hate hate HATE PC parties. They are so pushy and the reps always basically jump down your throat to host your own parties. Tacky and awkward. Plus, I'm super rude and open tell the rep "no, I'm not interested in the overpriced crap that you're selling and I find it rude that I already told you that I don't want to host a party and you keep asking me" and thus embarrass all of my friends (so they kind of don't even bother to invite me anymore, which I'm fine with).

There was a gal from TK that I was friends with on facebook that I had initially ordered some gorgeous TY notes through her. She kept pushing me to have an online party (since she was out of state) and COULD NOT take the gentle hint that I was NOT interested.

APDSS22 · March 2014

jdluvr06 said:

What is a ribbon hat or bouquet? I've never heard of that.

I was told the ribbon bouquet made from the pre-wedding gifts' ribbons was supposed to be used to practice walking down the aisle at the rehearsal. I didn't have any pre-wedding parties, so this was told to me by a friend who had bought me a small silk flower bouquet for that purpose.

lovesclimbing · March 2014

TheFutureMrsRohlman22 said:

jdluvr06 said:

What is a ribbon hat or bouquet? I've never heard of that.

I was told the ribbon bouquet made from the pre-wedding gifts' ribbons was supposed to be used to practice walking down the aisle at the rehearsal. I didn't have any pre-wedding parties, so this was told to me by a friend who had bought me a small silk flower bouquet for that purpose.

----------------------

Exactly. I had never really heard of it, but my aunt claimed all the ribbons at my shower and made one, and I used it at the rehearsal. It was neat. I did the same at my sister's shower.

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