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It finally happened to me...

emmaaaemmaaa mod
Moderator 2500 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary
in Wedding Etiquette Forum

So FI and I got an invite to a high school friend's wedding. The groom is much closer to FI but we all went to middle and high school together and FI and I were dating in high school.

The invitation said:
"Mr. FI last name and guest" <---They also used his nickname but honestly they probably didn't know it wasn't his real name haha

Good to know I'm considered "and guest" to my FI when we have been together longer than the bride and groom. I think the worst part is that they know me! I never realized the significance to finding out SO name's until coming here to TK.

FI was just like, "They didn't mean anything by it." All I said to him was, "Well, it's rude and I'll be sure to remember that when buying their wedding present." (Not that I would do anything that malicious).


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Re: It finally happened to me...

  • edandyedandy member
    100 Comments 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    UM it's rude and hurtful. My FI's stupid cousin got engaged to a girl after knowing her for about 4 months. I've been with FI for 9 years. I am the "and guest". This girl has been nothing but mean to me (FI and his cousin are close, so I have to see this dumb girl all the time) 

    I'm not going to the wedding, it was a long drive there anyway. lolll
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  • emmaaaemmaaa mod
    Moderator 2500 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary

    @HisGirlFriday13 You truly are the Queen of Snark. I love it. I told him he should say he's bring "Ex-Girlfriend". That would freak them out.

    Now, will I say anything to the Bride and Groom? No, they are good friends. But will I forget it? No.


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  • bethsmilesbethsmiles member
    10000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    That happened to me 3 years ago when two of SO's friends got married. But I'm fairly certain that couple did it on purpose because I know they don't like me. It still annoys me.

    His friends tend to have trouble getting my name right actually. The last of his friends wedding we went to they addressed everything to So's name and myname SO's last name. We aren't married, but that was more amusing than annoying. It was definitely better than "and guest"

    I think your FI should definitely RSVP with someone they can't stand and would never invite. It's just rude and lazy of them to write "and guest."


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  • wrigleyvillewrigleyville member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    My friend did the same thing a couple of years ago, which was weird to me since she asked how to spell H's first name.

    It turned out she needed his name for the escort cards. She thought it was common/proper to put "& Guest" for ALL fiances, SOs, and dates and then spouses' names for married couples. I've had a few other friends and relatives do the same thing, so I think it's mostly lack of checking etiquette sites/books. Ugh.
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  • gothic_fairy60gothic_fairy60 member
    Seventh Anniversary 100 Comments 100 Love Its Name Dropper
    My FI and I had this discussion last night. He said, "If my cousin is dating someone and I have never met her, she should not be invited by name. She should be as guest because if they break up then I dont want to wonder if she would show up anyways."

    I told him that no rational person would show up to their ex's family wedding.

    Him: "But thats why you date someone, to find out if they are crazy"

    *facepalm*
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  • InkdancerInkdancer member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer
    gothic_fairy60 said:
    My FI and I had this discussion last night. He said, "If my cousin is dating someone and I have never met her, she should not be invited by name. She should be as guest because if they break up then I dont want to wonder if she would show up anyways."

    I told him that no rational person would show up to their ex's family wedding.

    Him: "But thats why you date someone, to find out if they are crazy"

    *facepalm*
    Well since he's marrying you I guess that means you passed the crazy test!
    Daisypath Anniversary tickers
    eyeroll
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  • Pepper6Pepper6 member
    250 Love Its 100 Comments Name Dropper
    A year or so ago, I received an invite to a baby shower from one of H's extended family members, whom I've never met.  I would have already been a little irritated about obviously being invited only for a gift (since she didn't know me), but she didn't even bother to find out my name...my invite was actually addressed to "DH's Wife"....
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  • Amyzen83Amyzen83 member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer First Anniversary
    Pepper6 said:

    A year or so ago, I received an invite to a baby shower from one of H's extended family members, whom I've never met.  I would have already been a little irritated about obviously being invited only for a gift (since she didn't know me), but she didn't even bother to find out my name...my invite was actually addressed to "DH's Wife"....

    I'd get her an embarrassing gift, that would make her remember your name
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  • huskypuppy14huskypuppy14 member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    Pepper6 said:
    A year or so ago, I received an invite to a baby shower from one of H's extended family members, whom I've never met.  I would have already been a little irritated about obviously being invited only for a gift (since she didn't know me), but she didn't even bother to find out my name...my invite was actually addressed to "DH's Wife"....
    Seriously! She couldn't even put Mrs. John Smith?
    image
    image

    image


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  • fionahalliwellfionahalliwell member
    100 Comments 25 Love Its First Anniversary Name Dropper
    laurynm84 said:
    Pepper6 said:
    A year or so ago, I received an invite to a baby shower from one of H's extended family members, whom I've never met.  I would have already been a little irritated about obviously being invited only for a gift (since she didn't know me), but she didn't even bother to find out my name...my invite was actually addressed to "DH's Wife"....
    Seriously! She couldn't even put Mrs. John Smith?
    My thought exactly! She could have gotten away with that, no question! 
    Report Reply
  • PhoneCardLadyPhoneCardLady member
    500 Comments Third Anniversary 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    HisGirlFriday13 said:
    Ooh, batman is even more awesome!!

    Although Thor is pretty hot. 
    Actually I was thinking of Darth Vadar (aka "Darky Babe")
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  • mcgarci2mcgarci2 member
    100 Comments Second Anniversary 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    In response for the RSVP, just respond that "Guest" will be coming alone.  See what they do then.  I bet you they find your name and give you a call.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker}
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