Since grumbledore was banned

syoun1nj · March 2014

I'm now the "queen of etiquette" for explaining why "wedding socials" are rude.

http://www.weddingwire.com/wedding-forums/anyone-else-having-wedding-social/ccf40f3ddeb6ef67.html?page=4

Title: accepted.

CMGragain · March 2014

What! When did this happen? Details! Details!

photokitty · March 2014

Banned on ww, not on tk

kitsunegari89 · March 2014

lolwut?

lc07 · March 2014

I'm hoping you mean she was banned from WW...

Blue_Bird · March 2014

I was gonna say WTF?

APDSS22 · March 2014

I love how the bride with the HUGE dress avvie typed out the definition for "ethnocentric" like the people responding that it's not proper to solicit money just didn't understand that it's a different culture in Manitoba that makes this totally appropriate. *rolls eyes*

KeptInStitches · March 2014

Oh I was about to lose it! Grumbledore was only banned from WW, right?

CMGragain · March 2014

Thank goodness!

Emmy1493 · March 2014

I was about to RAGE! Hahaha.. but on ww, I can live with that! Not here on TK though

CMGragain · March 2014

Shame on you, syoun1nj, for scaring us! No, you are Not the new queen. Off with her head!

syoun1nj · March 2014

Ha! I didn't mean to scare anyone! Yes, I believe she was banned on WW. Not here, where etiquette is actually valued!

grumbledore · March 2014

You had me worried there for a minute, OP.

Blue_Bird · March 2014

grumbledore said:

You had me worried there for a minute, OP.

She lives!

crunchymamaof2 · March 2014

That was a mini heart attack! Did you guys read the one reply where the girl actually said she wished they were ok in her area so she could raise money for her wedding? And how happy she and her bank account would be? What the fuck???

CamiSelene · March 2014

Wow, those responses.... I live right near the border of Manitoba, and my fiancé's family actually is from Manitoba and neither of us have heard of anything so ridiculous. Some people just feel the need to support their stupid ideas.... hell, I used to be one till I came on here!

PhoneCardLady · March 2014

CMGragain said:

Shame on you, syoun1nj, for scaring us! No, you are Not the new queen. Off with her head!

Which one???

J/K!!

Kauris · March 2014

So I got two pages in and can't read any more. This chick is throwing a huge party to make money for her wedding, right? And she says it's okay because everyone else does it in her part of Canada. So, Canada ladies, are you tired of people giving you a bad name or what?

And I'm just going to leave this lovely little quote here: "Wrong does not cease to be wrong because the majority share in it." - Leo Tolstoy

LadyMillil · March 2014

kasmith1 said:

So I got two pages in and can't read any more. This chick is throwing a huge party to make money for her wedding, right? And she says it's okay because everyone else does it in her part of Canada. So, Canada ladies, are you tired of people giving you a bad name or what?

And I'm just going to leave this lovely little quote here: "Wrong does not cease to be wrong because the majority share in it." - Leo Tolstoy

I'm Canadian and I think the socials/stag and does are tacky. They are very common in the rural area that I grew up in. Once I left that area for university the only people that had heard of these kind of parties were also from rural areas. I don't want to generalize that these parties are something "hicks" do, but I think they are definitely a regional thing.

In my home town the stag and doe is seen as a way for the community to support the couple getting married. The members of the community have seen the bride and groom grow up and want to help them start their new life together. Do I agree with the wedding fundraising parties? Hell no. But I do like the love and support from the community that the parties represent in my area. (Well, most of the parties, some are a blatant cash grab, and actually attending the parties makes me really uncomfortable because why should I pay for your wedding?)

Chipmunk415 · March 2014

OP, I saw your title and immediatey started yelling NOOOO in a way that would make Vader proud.

lmcooper86 · March 2014

kasmith1 said:

So I got two pages in and can't read any more. This chick is throwing a huge party to make money for her wedding, right? And she says it's okay because everyone else does it in her part of Canada. So, Canada ladies, are you tired of people giving you a bad name or what?

And I'm just going to leave this lovely little quote here: "Wrong does not cease to be wrong because the majority share in it." - Leo Tolstoy

I hate these parties, I think they are beyond ridiculous. Like @cmfarr I don't want to generalize, but the idea of a wedding social/stag and doe/jack and jill seems to be far more popular in rural areas. The only people I know who have done this live outside of major urban areas, so it seems to be more regional in that sense. It's definitely not an "everywhere in Canada" sort of thing.

I've been invited to a couple of these by cousins or family friends, and all I can do is roll my eyes. The worst was the Facebook invite that I got to one of these parties where they had clearly sent an invite to every person that was a FB friend of any of the wedding party members...all 12 of them invited every person they knew. SO TACKY! If I'm going to pay for a wedding it's going to be my own thankyouverymuch.

LadyMillil · March 2014

lmcooper86 said:

kasmith1 said:

So I got two pages in and can't read any more. This chick is throwing a huge party to make money for her wedding, right? And she says it's okay because everyone else does it in her part of Canada. So, Canada ladies, are you tired of people giving you a bad name or what?

And I'm just going to leave this lovely little quote here: "Wrong does not cease to be wrong because the majority share in it." - Leo Tolstoy

I hate these parties, I think they are beyond ridiculous. Like @cmfarr I don't want to generalize, but the idea of a wedding social/stag and doe/jack and jill seems to be far more popular in rural areas. The only people I know who have done this live outside of major urban areas, so it seems to be more regional in that sense. It's definitely not an "everywhere in Canada" sort of thing.

I've been invited to a couple of these by cousins or family friends, and all I can do is roll my eyes. The worst was the Facebook invite that I got to one of these parties where they had clearly sent an invite to every person that was a FB friend of any of the wedding party members...all 12 of them invited every person they knew. SO TACKY! If I'm going to pay for a wedding it's going to be my own thankyouverymuch.

I don't mind when family or close friends send me invites, but it drives me crazy when people invite everyone on their FB. I haven't spoken to you in years and you think I would give you money to pay for your wedding?! Ummm, no.

I also love (voice dripping with sarcasm) when people have a stag and doe AND a cash bar at their wedding. You've made a couple thousand dollars to pay for your wedding, and you still can't afford to host drinks at the reception?

edandy · March 2014

I'm Canadian and the only thing that is usually considered rude on here that we do in my very small area is cash bars because the price of booze is off the hizzy. Raising money to pay for your wedding is soooo tacky.

(btw i'm not doing a cash bar, just providing wine and beer)

edandy · March 2014

kasmith1 said:

So I got two pages in and can't read any more. This chick is throwing a huge party to make money for her wedding, right? And she says it's okay because everyone else does it in her part of Canada. So, Canada ladies, are you tired of people giving you a bad name or what?

And I'm just going to leave this lovely little quote here: "Wrong does not cease to be wrong because the majority share in it." - Leo Tolstoy

I agree. When I say my area does cash bars, we all know it's rude. Mostly we do beer and wine, i've only been to a few weddings with a cash bar.

crunchymamaof2 · March 2014

Has the post disappeared for anyone else? I was just starting to get into it with them!

Amyzen83 · March 2014

Gosh don't scare me like that! I'm gone for a few hours and the top of the forums I read that grumbledore was banned and I instantly jumped to conclusions about newbs and their defending of bad entitled ideas!

syoun1nj · March 2014

The part I simply don't understand IS THE DAMN POINT. The bride and groom: rent a location, hire a caterer/bartender, buy large prizes to raffle off....and then sell tickets to try and raise money for the wedding. Wouldn't it make more sense to NOT spend that money and USE IT FOR THE WEDDING? (I asked this very question and the OP over there just said "lol i dunno!")

LadyMillil · March 2014

@syoun1nj From what I've heard from friends and family that have had a stag and doe, they make about $8000-$10000. I'm not sure if this is all profit.

crunchymamaof2 · March 2014

syoun1nj said:

The part I simply don't understand IS THE DAMN POINT. The bride and groom: rent a location, hire a caterer/bartender, buy large prizes to raffle off....and then sell tickets to try and raise money for the wedding. Wouldn't it make more sense to NOT spend that money and USE IT FOR THE WEDDING? (I asked this very question and the OP over there just said "lol i dunno!")

Typically it's not the bride and groom that host a jack and Jill/social/stag and doe/what have you. Usually it's someone in the bridal party or someone else close to the couple. And around here they try to get as much donated as humanely possible. So then the couple gets the "profit" after any expenses are reimbursed (if the host chooses to reimburse themselves).

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