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Louisiana-New Orleans
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walking down the aisle

aimeerobichauxaimeerobichaux member
Second Anniversary 10 Comments
in Louisiana-New Orleans
My dad passed away last january and "who is walking me down the aisle" is a very sensitive topic. I had already asked my uncle to walk me..but last night I had a break down and I want to include my pawpaw also...but can't "un ask" my uncle. I also feel as if I shouldn't choose....I have 2 other uncles who are very significant in my life and since my dad passed have stepped up big time in each a special way. 
I was to the point last night where I don't even want to walk down the aisle because no matter way it will be hard. 
I am just wondering how I can incorporate all 4 of the important men in my life while walking down the aisle.
Please give me suggestions....I am completely confused. 


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Re: walking down the aisle

  • ksbennettksbennett member
    First Comment
    My condolences for your loss and situation. There is always a way to include everyone! Where do you plan on getting married? How long of an aisle do you have to walk down?

    I am having my grandfather walk me to my father, and my father will walk me to the 'altar'. You could have the two uncles walk you at first, to the other uncle and your pawpaw, and then have those two walk you the rest of the way. It seems like a small role, but walking a bride down the aisle (no matter how far or with however many others) is always an honor. I think if you planned it out that way, the four of them would love to be a part of it.
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  • aimeerobichauxaimeerobichaux member
    Second Anniversary 10 Comments
    that is such a good idea! we are getting married at St. Marys Assumption Church. I LOVE THAT IDEA :) thanks so much! 
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  • silverspark7silverspark7 member
    Sixth Anniversary 100 Comments
    I also had a friend whose father recently passed away and her mother walked her down the aisle.  We had a part in our ceremony where we recognized our mothers during an instrumental song by bringing them both a single rose.  You could do something similar and recognize each of your uncles.

    I am sorry for your loss and know that whatever you decide will be perfect.
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  • gogracegograce member
    Third Anniversary 10 Comments 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    I love ksbennett's idea.
    I'm not sure if you've gotten married already or not, but I've got a sore spot about being walked down the aisle also. My father, while he and my mom were married my entire childhood, he wasn't very good at being around while I was growing up and they split in my adolescence (this is when he became really bad at being around). My mom's oldest brother really stepped up to the plate and was a great father-substitute for my sister and for me. I'd always planned on asking him to walk me down the aisle and give me away, long before I met my fiancé. He passed away three and a half years ago.
    I thought about asking his youngest son, but I didn't want to hurt my mom's other brother, my godfather (my Paran) and if I asked my Paran, I'd maybe hurt my other godfather's feelings. Even though my mom's remarried and my stepfather is footing most of the bill for the wedding, I ended up deciding to ask my mom to do it. We're going to replace my "father-daughter dance" with a "mother-daughter dance" because she's been the most amazing mother my entire life, bending over backwards to give my sister and me every chance she could. We're going to dance to Good Charlotte's "Thank You, Mom" because it has always felt so valid to our relationship.

    If you'd rather your grandpa to keep all of your uncles' feelings intact, talk to the uncle you've already asked. Explain to him that you love him and think the world of him and just can't express how grateful you are to have him in your life. Tell him that while you're so grateful to him for willing to take on this job, that you feel guilty not including your other uncles and your grandfather. Ask him if it would be okay if your grandfather walked you instead. Maybe ask him if it would be okay to do a reading instead. That is, if his heart isn't 100% set on it. Test the waters through the conversation.

    I'm sorry for your loss, but I know your special day will be great. :)
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