FI and I have been dating 11 years, and we're pretty ingrained in each other families. I would never think of leaving the women of his side off the guest list for my shower, so when my BM's (who offered to host one for me) asked for the guest list I provided them with the list that had the VIP's including the ones on FI's. The list was close to 50 people, as we both have huge families and while some are out of town, they would try to make it, or feel snubbed if not invited. A few weeks back, FI's Aunt sent me this text message "Hi Lennon, is your family having a shower for you? Cuz FI's other Aunt and I were talking about having one for you, I just wasn't sure what your family was doing?" I responded that she was very sweet to ask and that my maids had offered to throw one for me in june, and that I could put them in touch with the one organizing it if she'd like. Aunt responded back "Ok, we were just wondering because we hadn't heard anything yet." So my questions are: 1) Was I right to give my maids a list that included FI's side? Two showers have never been the norm in my family, but I worry that I was rude to my maids... 2) Was I rude to FI's Aunt? I just feel like the interaction was a bit..weird...IDK... I really don't want to come off as a spoiled bride in anyway because I am really grateful that people would go through such trouble for me.