Guest with a Dinner Question

tigersgirlgv · April 2014

Hi Ladies,

I am RSVPing to a friend's wedding this summer. I need to make a meal choice and the options listed are chicken and steak. No further descriptors, which is fine, but I really don't like mushrooms. I know that chicken marsala or something similar is often served at weddings. I'm not allergic, so if I am served mushrooms I will try to eat around them, but would be a little bummed if the person next to me was eating a delicious steak sans mushrooms, while I tried to avoid them with my chicken.

Is it rude to text the groom and ask if he knows what the specific chicken and steak dishes will be? I don't want to be annoying, but I'd like to make an informed choice.

OliveOilsMom · April 2014

tigersgirlgv said:

Hi Ladies,

I am RSVPing to a friend's wedding this summer. I need to make a meal choice and the options listed are chicken and steak. No further descriptors, which is fine, but I really don't like mushrooms. I know that chicken marsala or something similar is often served at weddings. I'm not allergic, so if I am served mushrooms I will try to eat around them, but would be a little bummed if the person next to me was eating a delicious steak sans mushrooms, while I tried to avoid them with my chicken.

Is it rude to text the groom and ask if he knows what the specific chicken and steak dishes will be? I don't want to be annoying, but I'd like to make an informed choice.

I don't think it would be rude. I would just send a quick text about how you got the invite, are excited to attend, and was wondering if there will be mushrooms in either of the two entree choices.

ktjanesmom · April 2014

You might get an eye roll but if that doesn't bother you, text away.

phira · April 2014

It's not rude to ask. I wish more people would take advantage of wedding websites so that they can let their guests know what the actual meals are.

wrigleyville · April 2014

I got a few texts like this before our wedding. It didn't bother me one bit.

Simply Fated · April 2014

scribe95 said:
I guess I don't really understand why it's necessary. If you are going to be jealous of someone next to you with steak then just get steak.

Unless the steak has a mushroom sauce. I worked at a catering hall and one of our options for the filet mignon was topped with mushrooms.

I think it's fine to ask for details. I don't digest dairy well, at all, so I always try to find out if there is cheese involved lol. .

tigersgirlgv · April 2014

Simply Fated said:

I guess I don't really understand why it's necessary. If you are going to be jealous of someone next to you with steak then just get steak.
Unless the steak has a mushroom sauce. I worked at a catering hall and one of our options for the filet mignon was topped with mushrooms. I think it's fine to ask for details. I don't digest dairy well, at all, so I always try to find out if there is cheese involved lol. .

Exactly. Unfortunately, no wedding website. Thanks for your advice, everyone!

HisGirlFriday13 · April 2014

Be prepared that they might not know yet. Lots of brides on here have ended up upgrading the cut of beef or kind of chicken based on the replies they get, especially if they have to meet a food minimum price.

vmj23 · April 2014

not rude at all, my invites where pretty vague (filet mignon or roasted chicken) A friend of mine selected the steak but then I saw showing her the menu's I made and she realized the chicken was a lot more fancy then it sounded. I just didn't know how to fully describe the meals on the tiny rsvp card and had to leave it that simple I'd be happy for people to ask me what the actual items are so they knew what they where getting

vulpiepop · April 2014

I don't think it's rude. I'd much rather answer a question about the food than have a guest pick something and be unhappy with it. Food, at least to me, is key to enjoying an event. If you don't like the food, you'll have a harder time enjoying the event, I think, and my guests' comfort and happiness are important to me. Questions like that would also alert me that I need to be more descriptive about menu items so I'd probably update my website to answer common questions like that.

AddieCake · April 2014

I would ask.

lyndausvi · April 2014

HisGirlFriday13 said:

Be prepared that they might not know yet. Lots of brides on here have ended up upgrading the cut of beef or kind of chicken based on the replies they get, especially if they have to meet a food minimum price.

Yep. DH often does tastings for wedding less than 6 weeks out or has menu changes only weeks out from an event.

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