Multiple Choices for Flower Girls and Ring Bearers - HELP!

Re: Multiple Choices for Flower Girls and Ring Bearers - HELP!

• Maggie0829 member

  

  April 2014

  HulaCherry said:

  Hello.
  
  I'm in a jam.  Currently, my fiance and I have said no to ring bearers and flower girls because we don't want to leave anyone out.  The only kids being invited my cousins' children.  There are three boys and three girls.  I think that's a lot of flower girls and ring bearers.  Is there any other way I can make them all involved?  I want them to either all be involved or none at all.  The kids would be heartbroken if their brother/sister/cousin got picked over the other. 
  
  All or nothing.
  
  Thanks for your help!
  

  I would just skip involving them at all.  Just make sure to get some pictures with all of them and you are good.
  

  
  

  But to the bolded, kids need to be taught that they can't always get what they want and there will be disappointments in life.  So don't be afraid to pick one flower girl and one ring bearer if you really want to have one of each.  They will get over it.

  
  

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• theartistformerlyknownas member

  

  April 2014

  I'd go with none. I remember being super bummed that my older sister and my uncle's niece got to be flower girls in my aunt's wedding and I was left out. Mostly because they got to wear pink dresses with hoop skirts and I didn't. That's a tough pill for a 4 year old to swallow. :-p

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• KatWAG member

  

  April 2014

  Just skip it. And take a few pictures with them. Please dont make up any stupid jobs like guest book attendant for the kids.

  

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• [Deleted User] member

  

  April 2014

  None - no one's feelings get hurt. If you want to make them feel special check out Oriental Trading Company, they have wedding theme activity kits that you could have for each kid.

  Here's something to think about if you went to having them all. You need a gift for each child, flowers and also invited to RD. If their parents aren't in the wedding party you need to invite them also to the RD to be there with their child. If you want them in photos not at the ceremony location you have to account for transportation for the kids & either put someone in charge of the kids or include the parents too.

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• princessleia22 member

  

  April 2014

  I'd opt for none.  They aren't critical positions.

  But, depending on ages, you may be able to include them elsewhere. We are having 3-year-old flower girl, 6-year-old bridesmaid, and 12-year-old groomsman. We are very close with our nieces & nephew and wanted to include them, not just in wedding, but in pre-wedding events also. But, you don't really want to just use them as cute props either, like carrying signs or whatnot. It would be hard to find useful, legitimate positions (although BM & GM aren't really useful) for 6 of them, so I'd go with none.

   

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• HulaCherry member

  

  April 2014

  I think that's going to be the best option to go with none at all!  I was made a "guest book attendant" when I was in high school, and trust me, I'm a) not even having a guest book and b) I know that's the last thing they want to do anyway.
  

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• Jen4948 member

  

  April 2014

  Never pick a wedding party member, even a flower girl or ring bearer, for the purpose of avoiding hurt feelings.  If the only way to do that is to have none at all, that would be my choice.
  

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