Put a fork in me... I'm done

SBmini · April 2014

Sorry everyone, I just need to vent a little bit. I'm done. I'm just done. I'm done with work, I'm done with dealing with my vendors. I am fucking DONE! I've been working my ass off at work for the past few weeks, completely overwhelmed and overworked. No one is here to help out- and when they do, they just fuck up and leave me picking up the pieces. I had four major client presentations today and tomorrow. I get some of the presentations done a week ago, and of course, this morning, while at the airport to go make the other presentations, my colleague in charge of the other presentation asks me to get some more slides together. I frantically pulled things together while other groups boarded the plane.

Then these presentations I'm doing today and tomorrow... I led. I was the leader. I got everyone together. I did the agenda. I submitted my slides first. I made sure we had everything in order. I did all the formatting. It's my fucking presentation! And my fucking plan! But the director who went with us- who has an 'inner circle' of "special" employees who he coddles and loves and would give the world for- decided that the other girl WHO DIDN'T DO SHIT is going to be the 'lead' and that she has to 'own' the presentation. I tell her this and she freaks out. Oh- btw, she's like 24. This is her first job out of college. She's been with the firm for less than a year. But Lauren who has been at the company for 3+ years and always pulls her weight? Fuck her. No, new girl is in director's inner circle so she's special and gets special things as a result. Did I mention that he gave all of them jawbone ups for Christmas while the rest of the department got squat? Done.

So now all fucking day I've been a 3rd wheel to their love fest. Even though on the plane I was the one finalizing the presentation while she read a magazine and I'm the one who killed it in the presentation. Oh, and she gets to go to a super cool conference next month while I can't get shit approved for me. And I'm going to have to do the same thing again tomorrow.

While all this is going on- I have tons of people at the office asking me for things, freaking out about things, and I'm on the worlds slowest internet and can't do anything they ask me to do. But seriously... it's 10 pm. I've been smoozing all day and now I'm supposed to not only make the changes to tomorrow's presentation (because little miss leader peaced out instead of offering to 'lead') but do all the work I couldn't get to today because there is no one else at the office who does what I do.

I'm so done. I'm done! The only crime I've committed to not be in this 'inner circle' and get all this special treatment is that I do a unique job and therefor, am not apart of any department. If I had this guy as my director I'm sure things would be so different. But then again... why should I even feel bad about not kowtowing to a guy who gives people special treatment regardless of whether or not they actually deserve it? It's fucked up and it isn't right. And I hate listening him talk about his summer home and his trip to France, and when he was ballooning in Africa all while I'm making less than I should be and having to deal with his shit.

On top of all this- my florist ordered the wrong colored flowers because she refuses to listen to me. My baker wants me to do everything short of a raindance to make a payment, my day of coordinator is USELESS and I'm trying to manage all this stuff while being in meetings and without internet connection.

D. O. N. E. done!

RebeccaFlower · April 2014

Uhg. I'm really sorry. Is there anyone else you can talk to about this girl not pulling her weight?

beharrington · April 2014

SBmini - I am so sorry. The only upside I see here is that it's a short work week and you have a three day weekend to take a breath. Long bubble baths/naps/lots of wine in your future.

climbingsingle · April 2014

That really sucks! I'm sorry!

grumbledore · April 2014

Your co-"worker" is a douche. You need a raise and a vacation.

JMalettas · April 2014

This *really* sucks, & I'd be frustrated as well! I get the shitty end of the stick at work sometimes, and it's never fun. As the PP said, you can always talk to someone about this other employee not pulling her own weight. Although, (especially if you don't have a specific dept, & by the sounds of it, work to help other depts), it could easily reflect badly on you. If anything, you may get the "you're not being a team player" lecture. If it were me, I'd push forward, keep being awesome-(as clearly you have been, & take on quite a bit), & start applying to move up within the company you work for. If that's not an option, I'd be looking to move to another company, where my work's better appreciated. I 'get' not always getting the appreciation you deserve, but if you're not getting anywhere with it, I don't see the point.

Planning a wedding is nothing short of another full time job! Try to keep in mind though, that it's *totally* worth every second on the wedding day! I remember being *so* stressed over certain things getting done, or certain vendors driving me insane, but it was worth every second. It works out in the end, and regardless, you come out married!

Unless you've ordered artificial flowers, I'm assuming you're getting married pretty soon, if your florist is already placing your order. I would definitely be demanding that she re-order the flowers in the correct colour. A good florist, who knows how fast social media complaints & all of that fly, will order them again correctly.

As far as your baker goes, have you missed/been late for a payment? Or is there a specific reason they're so adamant that you make one right now? If you aren't late, and don't 'need' to be paying the money right now, I'd be telling them that you'll be giving them their payment when it's due. If you've passed the payment due date, without making a payment, that one's on you.

I didn't have a DOC because I'm too specific to allow someone else to attempt to take care of things. (and I've heard too many people complain about how useless they can be, or how they didn't do their job up to the Bride's standard). My life planning our wedding was *completely* insane, but there was no way I was adding the extra stress of having someone potentially not do their job, then having to clean that mess too--*then* pay them. I'm definitely glad I never went that route. You should sit down & talk to your DOC, and see what steps can be made to make them more useful! If they're not doing their job up to your expectations, then I'd definitely make that clear, & make sure they understand what it is you expect.

Try to keep thinking positive, and deal with one thing at a time. I'd work on talking to each of these people in the next little while, to resolve the issues you're having. Obviously there's been lack of communication somewhere, and maybe something as easy as a phone call could resolve some of it.

Good luck!

*J

wandajune6 · April 2014

I am so sorry. It never feels good to be shit on at work.

I saw your baker post and would recommend giving them a call and finding an alternative. For the florist, I see 3 options: call and yell, outsource the calling and yelling to a loved one, or tell yourself that it isn't that important in the big picture. Given the stress you're under, I'd write it off or get someone else to call and yell for you. Save yourself the hassle.

Now here's the empathy/tough love part:

I wish I could offer job advice but, in my experience, the best way to solve that type of working situation is simply to leave. If you're not in the inner circle, it's unlikely that you'll get there. The last time this happened to me, I gave my notice and was begged to stay. I left anyway but wonder what could have changed if I stayed.

Take a deep breath, think about how excited you are to be getting married to the love of your life, and suck it up for a bit. Entertain your fantasies about quitting, take a walk in the middle of the day, etc- do what you need to do. Then know you're going to be out of there for a while for your wedding. And when you come back, think about if it's worthwhile to stay or if you should start looking for something new.

Good luck!

ElcaB · April 2014

Ew, I'm sorry.

Is there anything you can do in the meantime to save yourself some grief? Do you have any extra days off to use as a personal day? I know it doesn't solve the problem, but sometimes taking a mental health day can help you deal with it.

SBmini · April 2014

Thanks ladies. I was in a bit of a better mood today. I crushed it in the client presentation. The director accidentally called lazy girl the name of his last office pet- which I thought was hilarious and only reinforced my feelings.

And- at the end of it all, after client signed off, and director asked me if I could do all the work with my wedding and honeymoon, I said, realistically... no. So we're walking back to the car wondering who could help. Hmm... who could help with content creation. Who on earth could help with content creation? The whole time director and I are talking, the CONTENT STRATEGIST aka lazy girl is just being quiet. Finally director says "Lazy girl, could you help?" and she was like, "Oh yeah! Of course!" then for the car I went through next steps, got things figured out, etc. While she sat there like the unknowing newbie that she is. So that felt good.

Then- Another coworker send me a super condescending email about a project that I couldn't do because I was traveling. She had the audacity to CC my direct supervisor. This is another young, lazy girl who doesn't pull her weight and expects everyone else to pick up her slack. So I replied, restating all the things I told her about my restrictions due to travel, then told her I really didn't appreciate her tone, or lack of consideration. I CCed the head on the account. The head on the account then texted me, thanking me for CCing her, and ended the text with "wow, just wow." I'm interested to see how this all plays out tomorrow. Get the popcorn ready!

But yes, 9 days! Cake maker is still retarded. Florist is still a diva. Coordinator is still lazy... but what ever happen will just happen at this point. Can't stop this moving train!

Cookie Pusher · April 2014

SBmini said:

Thanks ladies. I was in a bit of a better mood today. I crushed it in the client presentation. The director accidentally called lazy girl the name of his last office pet- which I thought was hilarious and only reinforced my feelings.

And- at the end of it all, after client signed off, and director asked me if I could do all the work with my wedding and honeymoon, I said, realistically... no. So we're walking back to the car wondering who could help. Hmm... who could help with content creation. Who on earth could help with content creation? The whole time director and I are talking, the CONTENT STRATEGIST aka lazy girl is just being quiet. Finally director says "Lazy girl, could you help?" and she was like, "Oh yeah! Of course!" then for the car I went through next steps, got things figured out, etc. While she sat there like the unknowing newbie that she is. So that felt good.

Then- Another coworker send me a super condescending email about a project that I couldn't do because I was traveling. She had the audacity to CC my direct supervisor. This is another young, lazy girl who doesn't pull her weight and expects everyone else to pick up her slack. So I replied, restating all the things I told her about my restrictions due to travel, then told her I really didn't appreciate her tone, or lack of consideration. I CCed the head on the account. The head on the account then texted me, thanking me for CCing her, and ended the text with "wow, just wow." I'm interested to see how this all plays out tomorrow. Get the popcorn ready!

But yes, 9 days! Cake maker is still retarded. Florist is still a diva. Coordinator is still lazy... but what ever happen will just happen at this point. Can't stop this moving train!

I'm glad you're in a better mood today. Working with people who don't pull their weight can be very frustrating.

And on another note, can you not use the word "retarded" like that. Maybe I'm the only one bothered by it, but having worked with children with intellectual disabilities, that really bugs me.

Put a fork in me... I'm done

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