BM dress opinions please.

nep5411 · April 2014

I apologize in advance that this may be long. Okay, so I am having a hard time deciding on what to do for the bridesmaid's dresses and I would like some opinions. First off, my wedding is October 4th, 2014 and is at the North Carolina Renaissance Faire. My fiance' and I really enjoyed it when we went last year and figured why not have our wedding there; it would be fun. So now I am having some issues with figuring out what to put my bridesmaids in and also having problems with one of bridesmaids.

I have three bridesmaids, all of them being my sisters, and one of my bridesmaids has a smaller budget than the other two (her's is $75), which I am completely respectful of. The dress I was thinking of is around $65, but my other sister thinks it looks cheap and hates it because it is not "fancy" enough (those are her words, not mine). She usually does nothing but cause drama everywhere she goes and has been sending me pictures of dresses well outside of my other sister's budget ($115-$200+). I have told her numerous times no, that she needs to stop, and to give me time to decide on what to do. She then told me what I do and do not at my wedding, which annoyed me to no end and if that wasn't enough she then shows a picture of one of the dresses she likes to my sister with the lower budget and tells her that I want them to wear that one! Ugh...

So I am trying to decide if I want them to wear all the same dress, but in different colors. I was thinking red, gold, and maybe brown? I would like to keep the colors somewhat fall themed. My only issue with putting one of my sister's in a brown dress is I want her to feel nice in it and enjoy herself, not absolutely hate the color, so I am trying to think of a third color. Or if I should tell them a color and let them choose a dress they like within their budget? My only concern with that is I am afraid that my sister that has been causing a huge fuss about the dress situation is going to outshine the other bridesmaids. I'm sure I am over worrying about this situation and do not need to be concerned about what the drama causing sister is going to or not going to do.

Here is a picture of the dress that is in all of my sister's budgets:

The dress comes in a huge span of colors and is in everyone's budget. I honestly think it looks cute, but what do you guys think? Should I just tell them a color and let them choose their own dress or should I tell them the above dress? Also, thanks to anyone who posts opinions on this.

AddieCake · April 2014

How about purple?

nep5411 · April 2014

I have thought about purple briefly, but nothing more than that. Purple isn't usually a color I associate with fall, so I wasn't too sure about it. Thank you for bringing that up though, I'll put more thought into that color!

doeydo · April 2014

nep5411 said:

I apologize in advance that this may be long. Okay, so I am having a hard time deciding on what to do for the bridesmaid's dresses and I would like some opinions. First off, my wedding is October 4th, 2014 and is at the North Carolina Renaissance Faire. My fiance' and I really enjoyed it when we went last year and figured why not have our wedding there; it would be fun. So now I am having some issues with figuring out what to put my bridesmaids in and also having problems with one of bridesmaids.

I have three bridesmaids, all of them being my sisters, and one of my bridesmaids has a smaller budget than the other two (her's is $75), which I am completely respectful of. The dress I was thinking of is around $65, but my other sister thinks it looks cheap and hates it because it is not "fancy" enough (those are her words, not mine). She usually does nothing but cause drama everywhere she goes and has been sending me pictures of dresses well outside of my other sister's budget ($115-$200+). I have told her numerous times no, that she needs to stop, and to give me time to decide on what to do. She then told me what I do and do not at my wedding, which annoyed me to no end and if that wasn't enough she then shows a picture of one of the dresses she likes to my sister with the lower budget and tells her that I want them to wear that one! Ugh...

So I am trying to decide if I want them to wear all the same dress, but in different colors. I was thinking red, gold, and maybe brown? I would like to keep the colors somewhat fall themed. My only issue with putting one of my sister's in a brown dress is I want her to feel nice in it and enjoy herself, not absolutely hate the color, so I am trying to think of a third color. Or if I should tell them a color and let them choose a dress they like within their budget? My only concern with that is I am afraid that my sister that has been causing a huge fuss about the dress situation is going to outshine the other bridesmaids. I'm sure I am over worrying about this situation and do not need to be concerned about what the drama causing sister is going to or not going to do.

Here is a picture of the dress that is in all of my sister's budgets:

The dress comes in a huge span of colors and is in everyone's budget. I honestly think it looks cute, but what do you guys think? Should I just tell them a color and let them choose their own dress or should I tell them the above dress? Also, thanks to anyone who posts opinions on this.

Do your bridesmaids want to dress in costume for your Renaissance Faire wedding?

nep5411 · April 2014

Yes, they all want to dress up for the faire. I honestly think that is the part they are most excited about.

doeydo · April 2014

OK, well it might just be easier to give them a colour or something and let them pick out and wear their own dresses.
How it might look if they were all in the same dress:

Versus letting them choose their own dresses:

Versus their own dresses in a certain colour:

chibiyui · April 2014

FWIW, When my best friend got married a few years ago, she had 4 BM and we all wore the same dress, different color. The colors were red, brown, orange, and purple. It looked fab.

chibiyui · April 2014

Not exact, but an idea.

nep5411 · April 2014

@ chibiyui: Oooh, I am loving the look of the picture you posted!

I greatly appreciate all of your help and opinions. I am leaning towards all the same dress, but with different colors.

atlastmrsg · April 2014

doeydo said:

nep5411 said:

I apologize in advance that this may be long. Okay, so I am having a hard time deciding on what to do for the bridesmaid's dresses and I would like some opinions. First off, my wedding is October 4th, 2014 and is at the North Carolina Renaissance Faire. My fiance' and I really enjoyed it when we went last year and figured why not have our wedding there; it would be fun. So now I am having some issues with figuring out what to put my bridesmaids in and also having problems with one of bridesmaids.

I have three bridesmaids, all of them being my sisters, and one of my bridesmaids has a smaller budget than the other two (her's is $75), which I am completely respectful of. The dress I was thinking of is around $65, but my other sister thinks it looks cheap and hates it because it is not "fancy" enough (those are her words, not mine). She usually does nothing but cause drama everywhere she goes and has been sending me pictures of dresses well outside of my other sister's budget ($115-$200+). I have told her numerous times no, that she needs to stop, and to give me time to decide on what to do. She then told me what I do and do not at my wedding, which annoyed me to no end and if that wasn't enough she then shows a picture of one of the dresses she likes to my sister with the lower budget and tells her that I want them to wear that one! Ugh...

So I am trying to decide if I want them to wear all the same dress, but in different colors. I was thinking red, gold, and maybe brown? I would like to keep the colors somewhat fall themed. My only issue with putting one of my sister's in a brown dress is I want her to feel nice in it and enjoy herself, not absolutely hate the color, so I am trying to think of a third color. Or if I should tell them a color and let them choose a dress they like within their budget? My only concern with that is I am afraid that my sister that has been causing a huge fuss about the dress situation is going to outshine the other bridesmaids. I'm sure I am over worrying about this situation and do not need to be concerned about what the drama causing sister is going to or not going to do.

Here is a picture of the dress that is in all of my sister's budgets:

The dress comes in a huge span of colors and is in everyone's budget. I honestly think it looks cute, but what do you guys think? Should I just tell them a color and let them choose their own dress or should I tell them the above dress? Also, thanks to anyone who posts opinions on this.

Do your bridesmaids want to dress in costume for your Renaissance Faire wedding?

The bridesmaids should wear what the bride wants them to wear...it's not the bridesmaids' wedding. This is why I can't watch the Say Yes to The Dress--Bridesmaids episodes. The bridesmaids think it is all about them. If they really don't want to wear something, they can decline being in the wedding.

Maggie0829 · April 2014

SAHoehle said:

doeydo said:

nep5411 said:

I apologize in advance that this may be long. Okay, so I am having a hard time deciding on what to do for the bridesmaid's dresses and I would like some opinions. First off, my wedding is October 4th, 2014 and is at the North Carolina Renaissance Faire. My fiance' and I really enjoyed it when we went last year and figured why not have our wedding there; it would be fun. So now I am having some issues with figuring out what to put my bridesmaids in and also having problems with one of bridesmaids.

I have three bridesmaids, all of them being my sisters, and one of my bridesmaids has a smaller budget than the other two (her's is $75), which I am completely respectful of. The dress I was thinking of is around $65, but my other sister thinks it looks cheap and hates it because it is not "fancy" enough (those are her words, not mine). She usually does nothing but cause drama everywhere she goes and has been sending me pictures of dresses well outside of my other sister's budget ($115-$200+). I have told her numerous times no, that she needs to stop, and to give me time to decide on what to do. She then told me what I do and do not at my wedding, which annoyed me to no end and if that wasn't enough she then shows a picture of one of the dresses she likes to my sister with the lower budget and tells her that I want them to wear that one! Ugh...

So I am trying to decide if I want them to wear all the same dress, but in different colors. I was thinking red, gold, and maybe brown? I would like to keep the colors somewhat fall themed. My only issue with putting one of my sister's in a brown dress is I want her to feel nice in it and enjoy herself, not absolutely hate the color, so I am trying to think of a third color. Or if I should tell them a color and let them choose a dress they like within their budget? My only concern with that is I am afraid that my sister that has been causing a huge fuss about the dress situation is going to outshine the other bridesmaids. I'm sure I am over worrying about this situation and do not need to be concerned about what the drama causing sister is going to or not going to do.

Here is a picture of the dress that is in all of my sister's budgets:

The dress comes in a huge span of colors and is in everyone's budget. I honestly think it looks cute, but what do you guys think? Should I just tell them a color and let them choose their own dress or should I tell them the above dress? Also, thanks to anyone who posts opinions on this.

Do your bridesmaids want to dress in costume for your Renaissance Faire wedding?

The bridesmaids should wear what the bride wants them to wear...it's not the bridesmaids' wedding. This is why I can't watch the Say Yes to The Dress--Bridesmaids episodes. The bridesmaids think it is all about them. If they really don't want to wear something, they can decline being in the wedding.

That is true, but to a point. If all your BMs absolutely HATE the dress that you are thinking of, that should be something that the bride should take into consideration. Would you really be okay making your nearest and dearest wear something that they absolutely hate just because it is your wedding and not theirs?

[Deleted User] · April 2014

I vote for green

nep5411 · April 2014

I've pondered with the idea of green and I absolutely love that idea. I will most likely be going with green instead of brown.

thesummersky · April 2014

Dark green and deep purple are very fall-ish to me. Your wedding sounds like it's going to be a lot of fun! Best of luck!

artbyallie · April 2014

Let me preface this by saying I have attended the Carolina Renaissance Festival every year for a decade or more. Huzzah!

Renaissance garb for a $75/per person budget is not going to look great. It will look like a cheap Halloween costume. (And maybe I'm a costume snob but I tend to go for quality whether it's Halloween or a faire or a convention that I'm dressing up for.) A good bodice alone is going to cost at least that much. Would you consider letting them buy/borrow/rent whatever garb suits their personal taste and just provide them with matching circlets or flower crowns or something?

nep5411 · April 2014

@ artbyallie: It is a wonderful place isn't it?!

Yes, I am willing to let them rent. None of them seemed to really want to though. Two of my sisters love to go to the renaissance faires and I think they plan on keeping their outfit. I know how expensive the costumes get and I am aware that this may look cheap due to the price, but there isn't too much I can do about my sister's budget of no more than $75, unless I help her pay for it and sadly I don't think I have the budget for that.I could let them wear all different outfits and I thought about it, but I'm not sure how I feel about it either.

My grandmother has mentioned possibly making dresses for the bridesmaids. I have just heard today that she has dress patterns she wants me to look at. This could be a very good option for all of us. I just worry about putting my grandmother through all of that. I am super appreciative of all that she has done and wants to do for this wedding, but she has a tendency to take on more than she can handle. I live about 4-5 hours away from all of my family since I moved away to college so figuring out what she is thinking can be a tad difficult at times. I should see her in about 3 weeks for my graduation. I have not told my bridesmaids anything on dresses because I don't want to confuse them. I am aware a decision needs to be made soon which is why I posted that board.

I greatly appreciate your thoughts on it. I would love to hear if you have any more.

artbyallie · April 2014

Does anyone besides grandma have sewing skills? I usually make my costumes anyway, and though fabric is still expensive, it's a good way to save a bit. The historical costume patterns available can really look quite nice made up in decent fabric.