I think I love my dress?

helpmeimpoor · April 2014

I got my dress a week ago from a consignment store. David's Bridal was seriously disappointing for me. Everyone who saw me in the dress I purchased said it was very flattering...and it is... it's just not what I pictured myself in. It's very much a princess dress and I saw myself in something with at least a drop waist. The dress fits me like a glove...it has the lace I wanted...but for some reason I keep feeling kind of disappointed. I didn't cry, or have that OH MY GOD moment.

I guess I just need someone to tell me I'm not the only one.

doeydo · April 2014

Oh I'm so sorry. You do not want to or have to wear a dress that is not right for you. I would try to sell the dress then go shopping again and try to find something that you love. You may not have that "Aha!" moment or cry, but something that you love and you don't want to take it off; something you envision walking down the aisle in towards your FI.

nlh85 · April 2014

Don't panic, hon. It's okay if it's not exactly what you imagined. Sometimes that's even better, because sometimes there are better things than what our imaginations can conceive. And the fact is, even if you're one of the lucky few who finds her dream dress in her price range, you might discover that your dream dress looks terrible on you.

You said that the dress is flattering and that it has the lace you wanted, so hopefully it's a dress that you feel beautiful in, and it has an element that you thought would reflect you and your style. Also, if you feel it's too poofy (if that's what you mean by "princess" dress), you can actually have them cut some of the crinoline out of it. Now, they might be limited as to how much they can take out depending on the style of the dress, but that was a lifesaver for me. Try tucking the crinoline between your legs or having someone tie it down with something around your knees or ankles (I know it sounds crazy, but just try it), and you can see how it might fit with a little less size. It's just an idea.

Don't worry, though. I didn't have that magic moment, but I absolutely love my dress now.

CMGragain · April 2014

When I found my dress, I just felt relieved that I had found something within my tiny budget that looked nice.
When my daughter, who had a bigger budget, found hers, she just looked frightened. (It was expensive, but at the upper end of our budget.)
Neither of us cried. Neither of us had a "revelation" experience. We ate some cheesecake, and made the decision.
Please post a picture of you wearing the dress. We will give you honest opinions.

PS. Please consider changing your screen name. Lots of people don't have money, and they don't ask for help because of it.

vanessanini · April 2014

Not everything that will happen is within our expectation.I suggest you to find another dress which is really to your taste.

Dignity100 · April 2014

I never had 'that' moment. When I tried on my dress, I started comparing everything else to it. At the end of my appointment, I asked to put it on again and all I could do was stare at how pretty it was (and how pretty it made me feel).

vh2014 · April 2014

I made fun of my dress when I first put it on... I have a comforter that looks like the back of my dress... but once I started walking around in it I really loved it. It had all of my requirements and really was the perfect dress.. but no tears (that was the first couple I tried on weeks before when my mom and I realized it was really happening LOL). I was annoyed that my BMs weren't there so it couldn't possible be "the one"... but it was. Since then I've looked at other dresses (even though others say not to) and I have not seen another dress I love more, and every time I look at it I love it more and more. No question now in my mind... it's "the one". I think it's like FI... some people have that love at first sight thing and some people are great friends first and then fall crazy madly in love. My dress and I were friends first. LOL

helpmeimpoor · April 2014

CMGragain said:

When I found my dress, I just felt relieved that I had found something within my tiny budget that looked nice.
When my daughter, who had a bigger budget, found hers, she just looked frightened. (It was expensive, but at the upper end of our budget.)
Neither of us cried. Neither of us had a "revelation" experience. We ate some cheesecake, and made the decision.
Please post a picture of you wearing the dress. We will give you honest opinions.

PS. Please consider changing your screen name. Lots of people don't have money, and they don't ask for help because of it.

LOL it's a quote from the movie bridesmaids. Just a joke. I'm not actually asking for help.

helpmeimpoor · April 2014

Thank you guys for the input. I never imagined I would get anything beyond a very basic dress for my wedding so it exceeds what I imagined even as a little girl. I do somewhat feel like I'm settling but I do like the dress, it's already purchased, and anything more seems like a hassle.

It has a lot of tulle in it, with lace trimming at the bottom. It is kind of shorter in the front, I'm not sure if that's how it's made to look or if the previous owner had it altered because she was shorter. Does anyone know if it's possible to alter tulle to make a dress longer? It still reaches the ground, but if I were to wear heels you would be able to see my feet.

helpmeimpoor · April 2014

Also, I liked the way the princessy skirt felt when I was walking around in it. It's not what I imagined in pictures, but when I tried on a dress I thought I would love at David's, It wasn't the same. It was a gorgeous dress that looked good on me, but it just felt like a dress. The poofiness made me feel bridal.

Maggie0829 · April 2014

helpmeimpoor said:

Thank you guys for the input. I never imagined I would get anything beyond a very basic dress for my wedding so it exceeds what I imagined even as a little girl. I do somewhat feel like I'm settling but I do like the dress, it's already purchased, and anything more seems like a hassle.

It has a lot of tulle in it, with lace trimming at the bottom. It is kind of shorter in the front, I'm not sure if that's how it's made to look or if the previous owner had it altered because she was shorter. Does anyone know if it's possible to alter tulle to make a dress longer? It still reaches the ground, but if I were to wear heels you would be able to see my feet.

You are going to have to see a seamstress about this. They may be able to let take it down at the waist if there is extra fabric, but I kind of doubt it. You may just have to be okay wearing flats because typically once the length is altered there is really no going back since the extra fabric is typically cut off.

helpmeimpoor · April 2014

I wish I would have taken a picture with the train behind me from the front.

But the back is gorgeous.

hyechica81 · April 2014

some questions to ask do you love this dress or elements of the dress?

does this dress make your cry and teary eyed?

can you see yourself wearing this dress on your big day walking down the aisle to your fi?

when you put the dress on do you want to take it off right away or do you want to keep it on forever?

you need to ask yourself these questions

can you go back to the consignment shop and maybe exchange the dress for something else

or try to sell it on a preowned wedding website

flyingfoxes · April 2014

I didn't have a teary moment when I tried my dress on either - I think that's a lot of pressure because it doesn't always happen. I got my dress for pretty cheap, and since we booked our venue after walking around it - I know the bottom of my dress and train are going to get wrecked because it's a lot of pavement/sidewalk to get down to the gazebo - so I'm glad I didn't spend tons and the dress is going to be just fine for my wedding.

Your dress is very pretty.

shaylagirl · April 2014

I'm another who didn't cry or get teary over my dress.

I agonized over cost. Called my (then)FI and asked him if he was okay with the price. Went to the fabric store and looked at some general costs of fabric, spoke with my MOH, BM and my mom. I agonized over it for a good 2 hours (during which we ate lunch and talked about it).

I finally went for it. Because I didn't want to take the dress off. Because I knew once MY dress was sent to me, I'd love it even more (and I did). Because it had elements I wanted. Because it was so perfectly 'me' that I couldn't picture anything else even comparing.

Once I put the deposit down, I stopped agonizing and moved on through the bridal process and never looked at another dress.

I think women get this notion that we should cry or sob or have hysterics when we try on "our" gown. I think there's more to the process than that (I didn't feel like a bride until I went back a month later and tried on veils, that was MY personal 'moment'). I blame "SYTTD" and all those other bridal shows for this.

Of course, I also think we put a lot of stress on ourselves about this. "Back in the day" women just wore their nicest dress and called it good. Now, dress shopping is such a stressful event, that I find it kind of sad. The process should be FUN, not stressful.

Good luck, no matter what you decide to do!!

helpmeimpoor · April 2014

Thank you

I guess I got caught up in looking at tons of gorgeous gowns on models. My mother also wanted to buy the dress because she was upset that she's not paying for the wedding. I don't feel right having her pay for everything because 1. She can't afford it and 2. I've been grown and on my own for 6 years now. So after her buying it, I don't feel like I can just say "oh nevermind, I would like something different"

It's hardly the most important part.

theartistformerlyknownas · April 2014

I hate that all these dang shows have given people the idea that there is ONE perfect dress and ONE perfect everything and you must find that one perfect everything or your day will be ruined. IT WON'T. Don't agonize over whether there might be one better one out there than what you have.

I love my dress and it's gorgeous, but I didn't cry when I put it on. I cried when they put the veil on me, not even because the veil was that amazing, but because that made everything seem more "real," and I could imagine myself marrying my love. Honestly, I do still have second thoughts over "maybe I should have gotten straps and a v-neck!" but I just remind myself that I could get married in a gunny sack and it'll still be the most perfect day as long as I end up married to him.

If you feel your dress is beautiful (which it is), and it's in your budget, and you feel confident standing in front of the people you love most in the world wearing it (which you should - you look gorgeous in it!), then it's your dress. Try holding a bouquet and practicing your vows and see if you're still stressing about the dress in the back of your mind.

countrygirl061513 · April 2014

When I first saw my dress online, I hated it. Thought it looked terrible. When I picked a few to try on when I went to the store, I added it last just so I would have another one to try on. When I put it on, I was amazed and shocked at how much I liked it. It made me feel petty. I didn't cry, I didn't get emotional, I just stood there speechless. Once I made up my mind on that day, I tried to not look anymore online. But I did. I went through second guessing my decision. Then a month or two later when I went to purchase my dress, I tried it on to make sure it was the one I wanted and that was when I fell in love with it.

I love your dress. You look great in it. I would just put it away for a couple weeks and try not to think about it. Try it on again and see if you are still have second thoughts.

hyechica81 · April 2014

I didn't have that crying moment or wow moment there were three dresses one of them was on the plain side but the back had crystals going down the sides of the corset ( a morilee) but the back was on the lower side, then there was another morilee with a one shoulder strap and taffeta with lace i like it but was not sure. then there was this venus dress with way to much going on at the bottom and had this strange applica on the side.

I told the salon I needed to sleep on it i went to a place that had maggies and allures, and a few other designers, they had only one gown in the allure womens line i could try on that I liked they had other plus size options but nothing felt right.

i knew when the sales lady was asking me what my dream dress was taffeta lace one shoulder straps pick ups that i was describing the morilee

luckily the salon was able to squeeze me in to retry the Morilee on the way there i was crying because i knew this was my dress

CMGragain · April 2014

It is beautiful! My daughter is six feet tall in her stocking feet. She wore ballet slippers at her wedding. Since her FI was 5' 10", this was the perfect solution, and her dress didn't need a hem alteration.

beachyone15 · April 2014

I didn't cry either. I think it's common for some people to have mixed feelings after committing to a dress. There's so much pressure to find "the one". What has helped me is being able to look back at pictures on my phone that my mom took of me in my dress. Once I look back at them, I realize how much I love my dress and any doubt I had fades away!

Alikat9614 · April 2014

No crying or OMG moment here, either. I went to a place that sells samples that big name stores/designers donate and the profit goes to programs at the YWCA. I knew I would find a dress that day, but had no idea what kind I even wanted. I tried on about 7 dresses, and while 5 of them fit really well, 2 we're stand outs. Was the David Tutera by Faviana that I chose the right one? Should I have gone with the Maggie Sottero? Who knows. I love my dress, it fits awesome on top and just needs shortened. My mom cried, though... Every time I came out in a different wedding dress, lol.

[Deleted User] · April 2014

You're definitely not the only one. The most important thing to me was to have my sister and mother there with me when I picked my dress back in November as they live 2000 miles away from me. Now 6 months later I see my dress and I feel nothing. It's a gorgeous dress but since my sister got married in 2011, I've pictured myself in a lacy, romantic dress which my dress is not at all. I'm going this week actually to try it on and see if it's still the one so I definitely understand where you're coming from!

manateehugger · April 2014

Didn't even remotely cry.

I put it on, felt like it was pretty and flattering, it was in my budget, and so I bought it.

FWIW, I had a random photo saved on my computer for years; my wedding dress looks nothing like it.

Your dress is beautiful!

buddysmom80 · April 2014

I did not cry at all. The first time I tried the dress on, I was with my mom and she HATED it. I showed some of my friends the dress and their opinions, and everyone loved it (as did I, I remember when I saw it on the hanger, I said that was the dress I always thought I would wear). I went back to the salon again by myself (my MOH showed up later) and tried it on, and I fell in love with it, but I did not cry or have an OMG I'M GETTING MARRIED moment.

helpmeimpoor · April 2014

I feel much better now after reading all the responses

It's a pretty dress, it fits, it was basically a steal, no alterations needed.

When I think about ditching it I get kinda sad, so...

I'm just going to avoid looking at other dresses with envy now! The grass is always greener..

claudialrodas · April 2014

I f you found it comfortable and fits into your personality perfectly then it’s perfectly great. And congrats I think you will have many such more moments to come during your wedding.

claudialrodas · April 2014

I can totally understand about not overspending when you are having a budget, but instead of not spending on linen table cloth what you could do is rent them, as a while ago it was my cousins wedding where she rented table cover & chair cover from sculptware which had a reasonable rent rates and got along with the budget pretty fairly.

I think I love my dress?

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