this is the code for the render ad
Community› Wedding Discussion Boards› Wedding Woes
Wedding Woes
New Discussion

Should I take care of my mother, who does seem to need my help?

mrsconn23mrsconn23 member
Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
in Wedding Woes

Dear Prudence,
I am a 30-year-old man and an only child who has been living far away from my mother for many years. I’m now overseas, completing a Ph.D. She recently remarried and has a couple of wonderful stepchildren and step-grandchildren who live nearby. My plan had always been to return to my home state after completing my education so I could take care of my mother and bring her the joy of having her only child and future grandchildren nearby. But now I am beginning to feel angst about returning from abroad and living near home again. My mother is a very reasonable person and she would accept my decision, but she would be disappointed and I would feel guilty. Can I rationalize staying abroad? Or does the duty of the only child require me to move nearer?

—Guilty

Report Reply to Post

Re: Should I take care of my mother, who does seem to need my help?

  • AprilH81AprilH81 member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    It doesn't sound like the mother NEEDS to have him there and she has a husband and step-family around in case of emergency.  If the thought of returning to his home town/state causes that much anxiety I would not do it.  The resentment he would feel would outweigh any benefit of being there.
    photo composite_14153800476219.jpg
    Report Reply
  • ReturnOfKuusReturnOfKuus member
    Eighth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its Name Dropper
    This positively reeks of mom guilt trips.
    image
    Report Reply
  • VarunaTTVarunaTT member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    I think it reeks of overly dramatic martyr syndrome.  He never says she asked him to come take care of her.  It sounds like she's doing pretty damn well.  "Bring her the joy"?  He sounds like a peach.
    �
    Report Reply
  • dharmabunnydharmabunny member
    Ninth Anniversary 500 Love Its 1000 Comments First Answer
    VarunaTT said:

    I think it reeks of overly dramatic martyr syndrome.  He never says she asked him to come take care of her.  It sounds like she's doing pretty damn well.  "Bring her the joy"?  He sounds like a peach.

    I'm not sure about martyr, but certainly a grossly overinflated sense of his importance with respect to his mom.

    imageAlternaTickers - Cool, free Web tickers
    Report Reply
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards