My FI and I are currently working out the details of our wedding ceremony using the knot wedding guide (yeah, i know), and I realized I have NO CLUE what an usher is/does. I don't know why, but I'm thinking back to the weddings I've been two and i just don't remember there being ushers...or maybe there were and I didn't realize what they were doing.
Common sense/google tells me that an usher is there to seat guests (in particular VIP guests), but then of course when you google, you get lists of all the bs "jobs" they're expected to do. So now I'm more confused, and my FI (who is Bengali) has no damn clue either.
So my question(s) are these :
- Do ushers have to be men?
- Is an usher a separate role from your groomsmen, or can someone be both?
- Do you need an usher for all your guests, or just your VIPs? Do you need one at all?
- Is it more of an honor/ettiquete role (i.e. it's polite to have ushers for your guests) or a practical (i.e. helping more elderly/feeble guests to their chairs), or both?
- If you do, what is the ideal usher/guest ratio?
- Other than actual ushering, are there any actual responsibilities of the ushers?
- I'm assuming I gift them? Or is coming more from the groom's side?
I'm probably hugely misconstruing/over thinking this and projecting my general "aaah i have no idea what i'm doing and everyone is going to know" fears...but I need some hand holding.