Bachelorette Weekend Question

Re: Bachelorette Weekend Question

• climbingsingle member

  

  May 2014

  I think you really need to ask all the people that plan to attend what their budget would be for the weekend. Personally, $235 sounds reasonable to me (honestly in my area, it's extremely reasonable), but it might be expensive for others. 

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• HisGirlFriday13 member

  

  May 2014

  Lori&Chris said:

  Hi Ladies,

  
  

  MOH here, with a question about the bachelorette party.  The bride (my sister) would like to get away for a girls' weekend in a small town within a couple of hours' drive from where we live (major city).  We were thinking a 3-day weekend for Labor Day, and I'm looking at options to rent a house with a pool for everyone to stay.  I'd like to keep costs as low as possible and I'm trying to be sensitive to budgets.  

  
  

  My initial thought was to find a place, divide the cost by the number of people coming, and ask each person to add $35 to the cost of the house rental for groceries and I would buy food for the whole group for the weekend.  In other words, the total cost includes room and board, and the only thing I would tell the guests to bring is whatever booze she wants to drink.  I am expecting 10-15 people total.  Most everyone is in the late 20s to early 30s age range and we have a pretty varied demographic of singles, marrieds, mommies, students, etc.

  
  

  What do you think is a reasonable cost for a weekend like this?  Is it too much to ask for $200 per person for the 3-day weekend (+$35 for food)?  Please let me know if I'm way out of line, as I don't want to offend anyone.

  
  

  Thanks!

  You're doing this the wrong way round. Ask people their budgets FIRST, THEN use that money to determine what you can afford to spend for this weekend.
  
  I am early 30s, married, and although I could afford it, I would not give up a weekend, spend $235, and bring my own booze for a bachelorette party.
  
  And I would be very offended to be 'invoiced' for that kind of weekend, so I would decline, thus raising the cost for everyone else.
  
  I have been invoiced for b-parties in the past and have always declined.
  
  You should also ask people what THEY want to do/pay for. Your sister may WANT this weekend getaway, but the women being asked to fund it might not be as keen on it.
  

  

  
  

  
  

  I'm gonna go with 'not my circus, not my monkeys.'

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• Simply Fated member

  

  May 2014

  Lori&Chris said:

  Hi Ladies,

  
  

  MOH here, with a question about the bachelorette party.  The bride (my sister) would like to get away for a girls' weekend in a small town within a couple of hours' drive from where we live (major city).  We were thinking a 3-day weekend for Labor Day, and I'm looking at options to rent a house with a pool for everyone to stay.  I'd like to keep costs as low as possible and I'm trying to be sensitive to budgets.  

  
  

  My initial thought was to find a place, divide the cost by the number of people coming, and ask each person to add $35 to the cost of the house rental for groceries and I would buy food for the whole group for the weekend.  In other words, the total cost includes room and board, and the only thing I would tell the guests to bring is whatever booze she wants to drink.  I am expecting 10-15 people total.  Most everyone is in the late 20s to early 30s age range and we have a pretty varied demographic of singles, marrieds, mommies, students, etc.

  
  

  What do you think is a reasonable cost for a weekend like this?  Is it too much to ask for $200 per person for the 3-day weekend (+$35 for food)?  Please let me know if I'm way out of line, as I don't want to offend anyone.

  
  

  Thanks!

  I would definitely ask, first.
  I mean, everyone has their own set budget for what they would spend on a weekend away.
  
  Keep in mind, if someone can't go for what ever their reason, will that make the cost go up for everyone else?
  

  
  

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• MairePoppy mod

  

  May 2014 edited May 2014

  You're doing this backwards.You should clear a budget and dates with your intended guests. Make sure you can cover the cost of last minute cancellations because others might back out if they're told the cost has gone up. 

  
  

  I wouldn't spend $235 plus 3 days, especially a holiday weekend on a bp. And I wouldn't want to sleep on the floor. Just my guess that some of the mommies and students might not want or be able to spend the whole weekend at the bp. Will you have a plan for those who want to spend one night or an afternoon with the group?

  
  

  
  

                     

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• wandajune6 member

  

  May 2014

  I wouldn't spend that much on a bp either. I could afford it but it would mean giving up a holiday weekend with FI and family - and a vacation away when FI and I don't have the spare budget to go away together right now. I also know that most of our WP wouldn't be able to go either due to child care, budget or work issues.
  

  

  

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• Rebl90 member

  

  May 2014

  Please listen to the PPs about discussing budgets and timelines with the other bridesmaids before making any decisions.  My dear friend missed out on having half of her BMs with her at her bachelorette weekend because her sisters planned a trip without asking the rest of us what our budgets were or when we were available.  The photos looked miserable, and she was really disappointed - it became the opposite of what she was hoping for.

  
  

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• Maggie0829 member

  

  May 2014

  I would get email addresses or do a group facebook message and say  "Hey, this is what Sally is kind of wanting for her bach weekend.  What do you all think?  Who all is interested in helping with the planning and what is everyone's budgets?  Just looking to get a feel for what everyone is thinking." And then go from there.  Just because your friend may want a weekend get away does not mean that she automatically gets one.  As a bride I would much rather have the majority of my friends be able to attend my bach party then getting the weekend get away with only a handful of people.

  
  

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• sarahonlife member

  

  May 2014

  While that sounds like a perfectly reasonable price for what it is, it's also far above what I'd be willing to spend for a bachelorette party.  Especially for something like this where if someone else drops out last minute, my cost will go up last minute.  So I would decline to attend this sort of bachelorette party.
  

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• KPBM89 member

  

  May 2014

  I agree with PPs-please ask budgets first! 

  
  

  We just had an awkward situation for my MOH's bachelorette party.  Essentially we were all told what to pay without being asked how much we could afford.  Everyone just kinda said "Oh sounds fun!  Let me know how much it is!"  I personally couldn't do it, so I messaged her MOH right away to say I couldn't.  She never heard from others until she said "okay I guess everyone's fine with this because no-one said anything except for KPBM, so I'm going to book it" and then finally everyone spoke up.

  She found a less expensive place, which I still can't afford because I have my own wedding to pay for and had just sent her $100 for the bridal shower, but she and her mom are covering my end.  I'm making several things for the shower decor that would easily cost them much more than what they're covering for me, hotel-wise so it works out for us.

  
  

  
  

  
  

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• EllieAugust member

  

  May 2014

  I would get a budget range and dates available from VIPs (aka bridesmaids & such).  I don't think you need this to include everyone that will be invited...you are never going to find something that works for everyone.  But after you find a price range and a date that works for the VIPs, you can email the invite to the rest of the girls and gauge interest.  If it doesn't work for them, thats okay because the major players have already signed on!  They can decline.  

  
  

  I would also recommend, set a date that people have to commit by.  On that date, a certain amount is due.  This would be the amount of the house rental.  That way if someone backs out later (sometimes legitimate) you don't have to worry about paying more for their part.  You can say, well we booked a house based on the number of girls who committed.  If we have money left over we would be happy to reimburse you!

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