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Does this come off as pushy?

BlackLace2015BlackLace2015 member
100 Comments 25 Love Its Name Dropper
in Attire & Accessories Forum
I have told my BMs that they can pick out their own dresses as long as they are somewhat metallic and I plan to buy them whatever necklace or earrings they want as a gift ( we are going to a certain store together to do this). My question is, if I see a dress online that I think would work well for one of them, does it seem rude or pushy to send them a link? As long as I keep it lighthearted and in no way tell them YOU SHOULD BUY THIS? I would never do that but I just feel like if I see something I think they would like I should let them know.
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Re: Does this come off as pushy?

  • vsgalvsgal member
    Eighth Anniversary 250 Love Its 500 Comments Name Dropper
    If you have said and are fine with them picking their own dresses, let them do it. You should not even be looking for dresses for them online.  Too much temptation to send a link.  It would come off to me as micromanaging if a bride did this to me. I don't get the tone that this is your intention. You gave them the parameters you were comfortable with, now let them pick out what they like

    On another note, you can buy them jewelry to wear.  Make sure this is not their bridesmaid gift.  Jewelry to wear to to your wedding does not constitute a gift for being in your wedding.
    ROCK IS KING!!
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  • BlackLace2015BlackLace2015 member
    100 Comments 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    oh no, by "a gift" I just meant they wouldn't be paying for it. Thanks for the advice!
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  • AddieCakeAddieCake member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    I agree you should not be looking for dresses for them. 
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • OnceUponAVineOnceUponAVine member
    Third Anniversary 100 Comments 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    I'll agree with PP's - if you gave them the parameters for dress shopping just let them go about it. Now, as a BM I wouldn't mind if you said something along the lines of "btw if you're still looking, X has some really cute dresses out this season that reminded me of you"
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  • BlackLace2015BlackLace2015 member
    100 Comments 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    I did actually send my best friend a link to a modcloth dress that I thought she would like, and she said she loved it (it was also very affordable). I do not plan to follow up or ask her if she bought it, and now that I've talked to you ladies I will try to stop looking. I'm just so excited! I mean I'm picking out my wedding dress, but I would never be offended if they sent ME a link to a wedding dress? *shrug*
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  • hyechica81hyechica81 member
    Knottie Warrior 1000 Comments 100 Love Its First Answer
    it would have been ok for you to send dress links had you said i want all of you in the same dress and this is the color i want to use these designers these are some dates i have open to go to the bridal salon and look what dates work for all of you.

    with my bm 6 plus my moh 4 of them are out of state i gave them links to various dresses from designers the salon i got my gown from carried i told them to pick out styles they liked. that came in an aqua or seaglass color  and ones i liked. i took the local maids to the bridal salon and we tried on dresses and ended up finding one that we liked i then sent the info over to the out of state maids all four of them loved the dress


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