Just Engaged and Proposals

Fiance doesn't want engagement photos! Help!

My fiancé and I have been engaged since August 1st, 2013. We put off an engagement shoot until we were able to get the ring (custom made and looong process, story for another time). We finally got my ring about a month ago, but now my FH doesn't  want to have an engagement photo session. I was really looking forward to having one because I want to capture this moment, plus I was planning on using the photographs in our Save the Dates and invitations. His argument is that we can use some of the photos we already have, but none of them were professionally done, nor would they look right on a Save the Date, etc. Cost is not the issue, as I have found many photographers in the area who offer a fantastic deal. Am I being too picky? Should I respect his wishes, or should I push to have an engagement session? HELP!!

Re: Fiance doesn't want engagement photos! Help!

  • Why is he opposed to having them made?  Is he opposed to having pictures done as a rule? 

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  • Definitely need to find out why he's opposed to the idea before trying to push for it.

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  • AddieCakeAddieCake Beyond the Wall member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    Yeah, what are his reasons? Depending on his reason, if it means that much to you, you should tell him why it is important to you and see if you can compromise.
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
  • We have discussed it a few times, and his reasoning is always that he thinks we should use pictures we already have and that he doesn't want to pay for them. However I have told him that I would pay for them and that we can even find a wedding photographer that will include a session with their package. We have never had portraits, etc. done before though. I don't want anything extravagant or outlandish; just a few pictures that we can use on our stationary and to put in our wedding album. I just don't think it is a priority of his. :(
  • Hi LorlisaBaba, that is very generous. Unfortunately we live in San Diego and are having our wedding in Florida, and are not in the Dallas area. If I was in the Dallas area I would definitely take you up on your offer, but thank you.
  • KeptInStitchesKeptInStitches the Northern Plains member
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 5 Answers
    Also, @knotporscha, vendor.

    @lorilisababa, you are not allowed to advertise your business on the forums - it's part of the TOS you agreed to when you signed up.
  • So a friend of mine found a very highly recommended photographer in our area, she looked through their photos, loved the style - her and her FI decided to go with these photographers. They had an engagement photo as part of their package - photos came back and they both HATED the photos. Didn't capture what they wanted, "bad" angles - ect. So the photographers decided to give them the choice of a re-shoot, or they would refund their $$ less the engagement shoot price, and allow them to break contract.

    My friends chose choice #2 - found a new photographer, with a new engagement shoot - and LOVED these pictures. Like - she can't stop gushing about them.

    So you could always tell him its a really good way to  "test" how you and photographers work together before your big day. Plus - since they photographers have had a chance to work with you before - you'll both be more comfortable.
                                    Daisypath Wedding tickers

  • Maybe he's wanted by the FBI?
  • "We put off an engagement shoot until we were able to get the ring (custom made and looong process, story for another time). We finally got my ring about a month ago, but now my FH doesn't want to have an engagement photo session." ...Hmm, did he actually agree to do them before? If so, I would simply ask him to please honor what he has already agreed to. It's not right for him to agree to something, get your hopes up, and then back out unless he has a very good reason (money troubles would be a good reason IMO, but "we have the money and yet it isn't worth it to me to keep my word" is... not). On the other hand, if you never actually heard him agree and just assumed, I think you should hear him out. Y'all will disagree on plenty in this process, most likely. It's important not to pressure him just because you want something--hear him out and make sure he hears you out, it's good practice for marriage. :)
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