What should the wedding party wear???

lilacck28 · May 2014

For background:

I've been bouncing ideas around with one usually very logical bridesmaid. I have three bridesmaids. First, I told them that I was not too concerned with them matching, and said that I think I'll end up just asking them to pick any dress they find that is "mint, or peach, or light blue, or light pink,basically, a light color, and short", but that stressed her out. Too many options. So then I agreed that I would pick a few particular dresses out.

FMIL recently bought one of my bridesmaid's (Fiance's sister, who is a minor) a navy dress that I think is cute for an upcoming wedding where she is basically an "honorary bridesmaid". I don't want to make FMIL buy an expensive dress (or really any dress in particular). I can tell she does not want to. FMIL also recently bought FSIL a very cute bright orange floral dress that she thought would be for my wedding. But it's bright orange and seems like it would be hard to make work with two other girls... and... bright orange. I pointed out a david's bridal dress I liked that was lower in budget, and she said "that's so typical though." So, she likes picking out "unique" dresses for FSIL and I don't want to annoy FMIL by telling her to buy ANOTHER dress.

So I said to bridesmaid #1, well, FSIL has a cute navy dress now, and I know you have a navy dress from a previous wedding, maybe I'll just ask you all to wear navy and short. And she said "but the navy colors won't match!! I don't want to look like the odd person out!" Can't win. (And I don't even want them to be too matchy matchy!) Going to stop talking about it with her, and just think about what I want to do, and only bring it up again in December when I actually need to tell them what to do.

If I don't go with the navy dress idea, I'm obviously pretty nervous about talking to FMIL about getting a new dress, but I don't want her to wear the bright orange one.

Question 1: I also don't think FMIL wants to buy my FBIL (Fiance's groomsman) a whole suit. She's grumbled about it. Fiance's cousin's wedding is coming up, so we want to be able to tell the groomsmen what to wear now so that FMIL can purchase something that he'll be wearing for both weddings. So, we think we're going to tell the groomsmen to wear navy sports coats/ blazers (is there a difference?). (FMIL would still have to purchase this, as FBIL owns nothing formal. FBIL is 21 years old, but FMIL would still probably be the one buying.)

Should we tell them to get grey or khaki pants? Fiance has a grey suit that maybe he'd like to wear, or maybe he'll decide to match the groomsmen. Would khaki pants on the groomsmen look weird/ clash with him if he wears his grey suit? That bridesmaid I mentioned before said she prefers the look of khaki pants and navy blazers to grey pants and navy blazers. Thoughts on this?

Question 2: Would there be way too much navy if I had bridesmaids in navy dresses and groomsmen in navy blazers? And are navy dresses not springy enough for a Sunday brunch wedding at the end of May?

Thanks for all your future help. I never thought figuring out what the wedding party would wear would be so mind boggling. and I'm sorry this became so long. I seem to be pretty verbose on these boards.

NYCMercedes · May 2014

Question one: Khaki is far less formal with a navy blazer than gray is, so you need to consider how formal/informal you want your attendants to look. Personally, I think any color suit would look better on the guys than separates would look. The suits need not match. Question two: There won't be too much navy if all your attendants are in navy, and navy is definitely a spring color. Consider colorful bouquets and bouts. Btw, at 21, your FBIL is at the age when he is going to start having occasions where a suit is appropriate. There will be fancy date nights, job interviews, other weddings, and sadly, funerals even.

lilacck28 · May 2014

NYCMercedes said:

Question one: Khaki is far less formal with a navy blazer than gray is, so you need to consider how formal/informal you want your attendants to look. Personally, I think any color suit would look better on the guys than separates would look. The suits need not match. Question two: There won't be too much navy if all your attendants are in navy, and navy is definitely a spring color. Consider colorful bouquets and bouts. Btw, at 21, your FBIL is at the age when he is going to start having occasions where a suit is appropriate. There will be fancy date nights, job interviews, other weddings, and sadly, funerals even.

Bolded: I know. My fiance is pretty flabbergasted that he doesn't have a suit/ doesn't think he'll need one/ his parents don't think he needs one right now. But I don't want to argue with future in laws.

As for flowers, I was thinking baby's breath bouquets for the girls. I think they're pretty, sweet, and romantic.

[Deleted User] · May 2014

I think you are being very generous to everyone involved trying to take into considerating expenses & being able to re-wear the clothes. Tell FMIL to get FBIL a Navy blue suit. FBIL can't go wrong having that in his closet. If you decide to do Gray or Khaki pants, you can always go to Wal-mart or a local Dept. Store to get those. Again, a pair of Khaki should also be a staple in every man's closet. For the girls, I like the idea of letting them pick out something they like in Navy. With going with short versus long dress, it's fine for spring. FMIL can still get FSIL something unique, just in Navy Blue. Flowers sound great & you can still bring in some of the spring colors you had mentioned by getting the guys some colorful ties.

What should the wedding party wear???

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