Wedding Etiquette Forum

Thank You Notes KWR (Kinda Wedding Related)

So FI and I are the tech gurus on our block, most of our neighbors are retirees, we help them with their tech questions/computers/internets from time to time. One of our neighbors, who we have helped out a lot recently, bought us a thank you gift. It was from our registry. Since this was a thank you present, so I don't need to send a thank you note, right? Or do I since it came off our registry?

Also, my mom sent me an early birthday present, it was the KitchenAid mixer from our registry, YAY! (She says I can't open it until birthday, boo!) Should I send her a thank you note? Or not? I've typically sent thank you notes for larger things, like when my parents bought me a washing machine for my birthday....

Since they came off our registry, I want to err of the side or Etiquette. TYIA!

Re: Thank You Notes KWR (Kinda Wedding Related)

  • JoanE2012JoanE2012 Exit 21 (Jersey!) member
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 5 Answers
    I would send a thank you note for both. 
    pinkshorts27LakeR2014
  • A thank you note for a thank you gift is getting a bit silly, but it would let them know you recieved it which would be helpful. So, might as well in this case but if they had handed it to you, I would say no need. 
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  • vt&dtvt&dt member
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    I probably wouldn't send a TY note for a TY gift - but I would bring it up the next time I talked to that person "we used the ___ to make dinner last night, we really love it!  Thanks again!"

    and I would ABSOLUTELY write a TY note for the KitchenAid.  I got mine from my MIL at my shower and I think my jaw hit the ground when I opened it.  The TY note she got a week later included a list of all of the ways we used it!

    If she lived close (or you know how to package food) - I'd be tempted to send TY cookies. :)
    Kauris
  • KaurisKauris member
    500 Love Its 500 Comments Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    Thanks ladies, it's a big serving tray, so I will have to invite the neighbors over sometime soon, use it and thank them.

    My mom said since it's birthday I can't open it until my birthday, which is about a month away, so I will definitely send her some thank you cookies then, but in the meantime will get a note in the mail to her.

    s-aries8990
  • JCbride2015JCbride2015 Dirty Jerz member
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its Second Anniversary First Answer
    kasmith1 said:
    Thanks ladies, it's a big serving tray, so I will have to invite the neighbors over sometime soon, use it and thank them.

    My mom said since it's birthday I can't open it until my birthday, which is about a month away, so I will definitely send her some thank you cookies then, but in the meantime will get a note in the mail to her.
    This is what I would do, too.  If my mom gave me the gift in person I would not send her a note (she'd think it was weird) but since it came in the mail and she didn't see your reaction, a note is nice.
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    "I'm not a rude bitch.  I'm ten rude bitches in a large coat."

  • I always send notes for gifts.
    My colors are "blood of my enemies" and "rage".

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  • Writing a thank you note for a thank you gift is a bit much. (I think someone else wrote the exact same thing above?)

    However - I might write a note on plain stationery (floral or monogram note card - not a "thank you" design on the front) that says something like:

    Dear neighbor - 

    I was absolutely delighted when I received the serving tray. As you know, John and I are always happy to help with any of your technology questions and it's great having you as neighbors. Your kindness is greatly appreciated.

    -You and Fi (Who I have named "John")


    Yes, it is a thank you note, but it doesn't "scream" thank you - it lets your neighbor know you did receive the gift and like it. 

    I dunno....thoughts?


    For the kitchen aid mixer - I'm going to suggest it goes along with your relationship with your mother. The rule I loosely follow is if the person hands it to me, sees me open it and I say thank you immediately, I don't send a thank you. (NOT for showers - I'm talking coming to my house alone for a birthday or a christmas gift.) If the gift arrives at my house after being purchased from a registry or sent to me, I write a thank you note immediately.

    (I wrote thank you notes for the showers that were thrown for me. That seems obvious, but I just wanted to point that out.)

    I live close to my mother and see her very often.  If she shipped something to me (she has), I might mention it to her or talk about it and say thank you either in person or over the phone. I have even mentioned writing thank you notes, and she will say "please don't write one. You don't need to. I know you like it" or something to that effect. 

    If you do not live close to your mom and it arrived to your house, and you will not see your mom in the near future? Then send a thank you note. But, I feel that really depends on your relationship with her.
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    Kauris[Deleted User]
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