October 2014 Weddings

What have you learned?

Has anyone here attended other weddings as a guest or member of the wedding party in the time you've been engaged? Did that help you with your planning?
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Re: What have you learned?

  • For me, attending other weddings this spring made me realize that we were putting all of our time and energy into planning the party, and we really need to start to focus on the ceremony!
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  • JennyColadaJennyColada Awesometown, CA member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary First Answer
    I've only been to three weddings ever, and none of them while I was engaged. I'm not invited to any weddings either. I wish that more of my friends were getting married though so that I could live vicariously through all of their pre-wedding parties and stuff!
  • labrolabro Hotlanta member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    edited June 2014
    My sister got married about a month before FI and I got engaged. Being her MOH and helping her plan meant I was pretty much completely prepared to organize my own wedding. I'm using a couple of the same vendors she used and it made a huge difference that she had already compiled addresses for our extended family into an excel so I didn't have to do it myself.



  • I've only been to three weddings ever, and none of them while I was engaged. I'm not invited to any weddings either. I wish that more of my friends were getting married though so that I could live vicariously through all of their pre-wedding parties and stuff!
     
    We had 2 we went to last year. But both were quick weddings. Engaged and married in like 8-9 months. We've had a 3+ year enagement. I did learn a few things from those two though. But no weddings in the future. We are also the first of our friends getting married. Also the first to get our own place! I told my fiance were the "adults" of our friends lol!

     

  • BlergbotBlergbot An enchanted land member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments Third Anniversary First Answer
    We learned that we are super glad we have a DOC, because groom was stressed OUT about the chair set up (it had to be perfect, which is another thing to strike off the list: no one cares if the chairs are lined up absolutely perfectly!)

    We are having a friend officiate and not some random judge who doesn't know us and likes to go off script with "jokes" (we thought about going with the same judge). 
    Having a first look and not taking an hour for pictures after the ceremony (there was no gap, but FI and I needed to be in some of them).
  • for me, the planning has been mostly impacted by my previous wedding.  And what I've learned is very simple...Nothing matters more that day than getting married to your FI and having a great time with the people you love.  Period.  The dress, the uplighting, the flowers, the 'must have' play list...all the little things you stress about don't matter.

    So long as everyone is well fed, watered, and has good conversation.  That's all you truly need :)
    JasperandOpalJean0715lilariestuckerwood
  • Dignity100Dignity100 Northeastern Ohio member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer
    I'm going to a wedding this weekend.  Honestly, I'm not sure how one wedding could affect mine since mine is so different from what everybody else is doing.


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  • kla728kla728 member
    100 Comments 25 Love Its First Anniversary Name Dropper
    I'm with @JennyColada... FI & I are at the beginning of the wave for our friends and family.  I wish I had some weddings to go to so that I could take notes!  haha
  • Went to a wedding this weekend. Reconfirmed not to have tall center pieces, no one bothers with the games you set out (how well do you know and eye spy with camera) and roast beef is fatty an unevenly cooked. All things I'll be avoiding if possible. Oh and so glad we're not having a DJ- I've seen more bad ones than good ones.
  • Dignity100Dignity100 Northeastern Ohio member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer
    I went to the most awkward wedding this weekend.  So here are my take aways:
    (1) Make sure your officiant is well versed.  The officiant forgot to seat us until about half way through the ceremony - so we all stood up.  When she realized she was so embarrassed she forgot where she was in her talking about the couple and just moved on.

    (2) There was a 3 hour gap between the wedding and the ceremony.  Thankfully we were local and could go home for a few hours.

    (3) The food was HORRIBLE - yes your guests do notice if the food sucks.  When they called for seconds, NOBODY went - usually you at least get 1 person who will go up... but NOBODY went up.

    (4) They didn't put enough cake out on the cake table.  I guess they had half of it boxed and handed it out later, but it was after we had left.  I was REALLY looking forward to trying the cake because I've been having a hard time choosing cake flavors.  Most weddings I've been to, buffet or otherwise, they still SERVED the cake to the table.

    (5) Make sure you hire your vendors for a long enough period.  When the Bride & Groom were making their rounds, they asked that we send them any pictures we took because their photographer was only there for a little bit longer.  They also mentioned how they had to stage/fake their father/daughter mother/son dances to make sure they got pictures because they didn't book the photographer long enough.

    (6) They did have an open bar, however the bartenders were not good.  They had 2 - the one was heavy on the alcohol (I got a whiskey sour --- it was pure whiskey) and the other bartender barely gave any - I guess the proper thing to do would have been get a whiskey sour from each and mix the 2 drinks together and it would have tasted like I wanted.

    So what I really learned is - Doing the SMALL family wedding is exactly what will make me happy.  I decided I love the fact we're not going to have dancing beyond the traditional dances and that we're just doing dinner at a sit down restaurant where everybody can order what they want.  Their wedding really confirmed that the FI & my wedding is exactly what I want!!


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  • I've learned how important it is to talk to your DJ! Was at a wedding recently and the music was awful and nobody wanted to dance.

    Also, double check messages regarding attendance!
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  • smalfrie19smalfrie19 Home of SB XLVIII Champs member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments Fourth Anniversary Name Dropper
    I went to a wedding last satuday and it was SO disorganized! The groom and groomsmen were late, I was roped into being the DOC pretty much and the bride forgot straight pins for the boutonnieres. It just reinforced that things will be ON TIME and I will have ALL my bases covered. 
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  • @smalfrie19‌ - I would have never thought that I would need to bring the straight pins!!! (Unless someone told me to of course) Ugh! So many details!
  • smalfrie19smalfrie19 Home of SB XLVIII Champs member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments Fourth Anniversary Name Dropper
    @smalfrie19‌ - I would have never thought that I would need to bring the straight pins!!! (Unless someone told me to of course) Ugh! So many details!
    If you are having them done by a florist you probably wont. But she just bought a bouquet of roses and used them and I am doing silk flowers so I need them too @Pepperally 
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  • Don't forget lunch! 

    If you are having your girls get ready all morning and have pictures before the ceremony, it is nice to provide some lunch at some point - you don't want stomachs growling as you're walking down the aisle!
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    Jean0715
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