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Wedding Invitations & Paper

Help! Shower invite wording

Hello - I'm the maid of honor, throwing a family and friends bridal shower. The bride has asked me to include a line in the invitation about "family-friendly g-rated gifts" - basically, she would rather not receive sex toys and lingerie in front of her fiance's 89-year-old grandmother. I agree that for a family/friends shower (and not a bachelorette party) it would mortify me to receive something along those lines. I get where she's coming from. But a) I think it is in bad taste to assume anybody would do this, b) I was raised to believe that when somebody gives you a gift, you say thank you and shut up about it even if it's in poor taste and c) if somebody is going to embarass you, they're going to do it no matter what is on the invitation. I have asked if there is somebody in particular she is concerned about and offered to call them personally about it, or hand-write something separate on their invitation, but I don't want people to think this is coming from me. Does anybody have any ideas how to handle this? Can I say something like "Sadie asked us to keep gifts and anesdotes G-rated!"? Can I tell the bride I don't want to do this? I would personally be offended to receive an invitation with anything like this in it. Thanks!

Re: Help! Shower invite wording

  • CMGragainCMGragain member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    edited June 2014
    Tell the bride that you are sorry, but that you cannot include her request in the invitation.  I'm probably near her grandmother's age, and off color gifts wouldn't bother me.  They reflect on the giver, not the giftee.
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  • In my circle, people don't usually give these kinds of gifts at a shower unless it's a personal shower or bachelorette party. That being said, I would "forget" to include it.
  • Unless it's specified to be a lingere shower, I think people generally leave the sex-related stuff for the bachelorette party.

    I agree it would be in poor taste to include on the invite; I say you "forget" to include it because the invites looked so pretty as is, and then tell her you'll help spread by word of mouth that a lot of her family will be in attendance. I know if I was told gradma woud be there, I would not walk in with a bunch of sex toys.

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  • It would never occur to me to bring anything sexual to a shower, and a shower honoree should never dictate the type of gifts people bring them. 

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  • I got one nightie at my bridal shower but it was NBD.

  • labrolabro member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Just designate where the bride is registered and hope for the best. I have seen this happen though. At my BFF's little sister's shower last year, her FSIL brought her a whole bunch of raunchy underwear as her shower gift. It was a traditional shower in all other respects, kitchenware, linens, stuff like, and then out of nowhere came the bag full of underwear. It was a little awkward in front of her mom's friends and grandparents but I'm sure they all just laughed and moved on to the next gift.



  • I agree this is probably a non issue. I think most people would err on the side of caution and not get risque things for a bridal shower unless they knew it was that kind of shower. 
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • I've never seen any of those kind of gifts at a shower. And I've attended a lot of showers. 
  • doeydodoeydo member
    Seventh Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Who in the world would bring X-rated gifts to a bridal shower with all the family?
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