Groom giving bride a hard time about Tuxedo

[Deleted User] · June 2014

I have done all the planning for our wedding, not by choice but because when I have included him he has told me to make the decisions myself so I have. I have been planning all the details for our wedding for the last year and half. 3 months till our wedding he decides he wants to wear a blue suit which does not match our wedding. What do I do? I feel like I'm going to go crazy. I'm disappointed and I feel like all this planning was for nothing. I feel like its a slap in the face.

Maggie0829 · June 2014

It sucks that he really didn't want to be involved, but he really should have say over his attire. I am sure he didn't give you input on your dress so he should be able to wear whatever he wants. Also, did you tell him you had picked out tuxes before now or he just now finding out because he needs to get fitted?

And a dark blue suit will pretty much go with anything unless you are having a black tie wedding.

[Deleted User] · June 2014

We had discussed the color scheme prior to actually choosing the flowers, bridesmaids dresses, decorations, etc... he has been well aware of the color scheme and agreed to it. It is extremely unfair for him to decide to wear a blue suit out of nowhere to our wedding especially since it doesn't make any sense.

Maggie0829 · June 2014

melanie803 said:

We had discussed the color scheme prior to actually choosing the flowers, bridesmaids dresses, decorations, etc... he has been well aware of the color scheme and agreed to it. It is extremely unfair for him to decide to wear a blue suit out of nowhere to our wedding especially since it doesn't make any sense.

I didn't ask about the color scheme. I asked if you had talked to him about his attire before now.

Look I get you are irritated but you need to take a step back, take a deep breath and decide if this is something that you really want to make into a big thing.

What are your colors? Could your FI just not be aware that a blue suit doesn't really go with your colors? Could you two come to a compromise, like him wearing a grey suit instead or a tux?

doeydo · June 2014

melanie803 said:

I have done all the planning for our wedding, not by choice but because when I have included him he has told me to make the decisions myself so I have. I have been planning all the details for our wedding for the last year and half. 3 months till our wedding he decides he wants to wear a blue suit which does not match our wedding. What do I do? I feel like I'm going to go crazy. I'm disappointed and I feel like all this planning was for nothing. I feel like its a slap in the face.

melanie803 said:

We had discussed the color scheme prior to actually choosing the flowers, bridesmaids dresses, decorations, etc... he has been well aware of the color scheme and agreed to it. It is extremely unfair for him to decide to wear a blue suit out of nowhere to our wedding especially since it doesn't make any sense.

Holy moly woman. You need to take a deep breath and calm down. Your wedding will not be for naught if he chooses to wear a dark blue suit. He should be able to choose what he wants to wear, just like you chose what you wanted to wear. You said you talked about colour scheme. Great, but sometimes to a person that doesn't mean anything about what colour suit he is going to wear. What are your colours, anyways? Because now I want to show you some pictures of wedding wherein the groom wore blue and the whole thing worked out.

AddieCake · June 2014

Did he give you a reason for the blue suit as opposed to another color suit?

hanckypanky · June 2014

As long as he doesn't want a powder blue suit from the 70's, he'll look fine.

Rosebubbly · June 2014

Dying to know the colors now....

JasperandOpal · June 2014

Are we talking an unusual blue suit? If its a dark blue, it will go with whatever colors you have chosen because its considered a neutral (like a white/off white/cream dress goes with everything, or a black suit goes with everything). People will only really notice, as others have said, if it a black tie event. Otherwise, they will see how happy he is to get to wear the suit he wants and how happy he is to be marrying you and not notice anything else.

If it is an unusual blue then people will notice that he is wearing it but will write it off as a quirk or a unique element (like guys wearing suits and chucks or whatever "personalization" people do to their outfits).

What colors have you chosen for your wedding? I am sure there is a way of integrating blue, if you feel that is necessary, that won't destroy the look you were going for.

One final thing: have you tried discussing the suit with him? Not telling him that its ruining your plan, but actually talking about why he picked that color and looking at the styles and colors he was interested in (or the particular suit he chose). If you approach it right you might find out a) why its so important to him that his suit be blue which might help you see his side of things, or b) that its actually not the color he is drawn to but the styling or cut or some other element that could be replicated in a suit more to your liking.

edit: paragraph breaks

CMGragain · June 2014

What time is your wedding?

climbingsingle · June 2014

Does he want to wear a ruffly powder blue suit? Because otherwise I don't see what you're freaking out about. I'm a firm believer that each person should get to wear whatever they want to their own wedding. How would you feel if he told you that you couldn't wear the dress you wanted?

goldchocobo.defunct635829490514903826 · June 2014

hanckypanky said:

As long as he doesn't want a powder blue suit from the 70's, he'll look fine.

I vote for the powder blue suit.

My coworkers wife's dad wore a brown suit with black satin lapels to walk her down the aisle. He stood out like a sore thumb against everyone else's attire, but his smile was the biggest and brightest and in the end, life was good.

southernbelle0915 · June 2014

Unless your wedding is black tie, he doesn't need to wear a tux.

Think for a second about how you would feel if you picked out something you felt good about for your wedding day and he was all "omg melanie830, you're going to wear THAT? it doesn't match what I've been planning. It's off on the color scheme, isn't the right style and our pictures are going to look bad."

You'd feel pretty awful and hurt right? You'd probably be thinking "why is more concerned about pictures, color scheme and style than how I feel?" I guess what I'm saying is that 30 years from now if you look back at pics and he's wearing a blue suit, you're more likely to say "glad he was happy on our wedding day" than "good thing he matched our color scheme".

Groom giving bride a hard time about Tuxedo

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