A new level of class....

kevinandmonica2011 · March 2011

So... We received an RSVP last night form some of our OOT guests (Kevin's family) with 4 marked as coming. No hotel listed, and a 0 written in by seats for the bus (which means they did not simply ignore the back of the card).

I asked Kevin to call his Aunt and clarify this. I can't imagine someone driving 6 hours to the reception site and NOT taking the bus to the ceremony.

They are not coming to the ceremony.

This is not a time issue (work late, won't arrive til reception starts, blah blah). They do not want to come to the ceremony, only want to come for the party. WTF

I don't know if I am overreacting, but I am really annoyed by this. You mean to tell me you are actually going to make the effort to drive 6 huors to get here, pay for a hotel, but you don't want to bother actually watching us get married.... you're in it for the free meal and booze.

Anyone else dealing with something like this?

DondadaTimes2 · March 2011

Oooo. Thatd prolly piss me off too. We dont have all too many OOT and havent received any reply from them yet (invites only went out Tues) so I dunno if thatll happen to us or not but hmmm. Not cool.

sbolger17 · March 2011

I would be really irritated too. That's so rude!!

emierose · March 2011

wow, very very classless. I can understand the time contraints when people are running from work, don't have a sitter for the full day, or something to that extend. I've missed one ceremony before for work reasons (and once because our travel arrangements were delayed). But really? I'd be tempted to retract the invite....

clneary · March 2011

That would piss me right off, I would be tempted also to retract that invite, it is amazing how rude people can be! I am forseeing some drama in this area so I have already decided that if I do not recieved the RSVP card by the date listed on them, those who didn't respond will be considered as not coming and that is that, no courtesy phone call (unless its someone old who truly may have forgotten) and also on the day of the wedding, if the guests did not RSVP then they will not be allowed into the reception venue..I am sure it sounds harsh but I just need to protect myself because I can just see several people intentionally not RSVPing and then all showing up to piss me off..but I refuse to let them bring me down on my wedding day!

As far as your situation I would have your fiance make mention to his mom or dad, whichever side of the family these people are on and have them ask what the deal is and they can inform these people that it is incredibly rude and its unappreciated.

kevinandmonica2011 · March 2011

As much as I would love to retract the invite, I refuse to make myself look like the jerk here.

She can come to the reception then wiggle around and try to explain herself when people ask where she was for the ceremony. I might make it a point to say (in front of a few others) that we certainly missed her at the ceremony and watch her squirm a little, but in reality... I will probably be so excited and caught up in all the beauty of the day that I really won't even care.

Cassie-

"I am forseeing some drama in this area so I have already decided that if I do not recieved the RSVP card by the date listed on them, those who didn't respond will be considered as not coming and that is that, no courtesy phone call (unless its someone old who truly may have forgotten) and also on the day of the wedding, if the guests did not RSVP then they will not be allowed into the reception venue.."

Your wedding is in July... you haven't sent out invites yet... why the attitude? You are assuming people are going to be rude and intentionally not RSVP? Seriously? Either you must have a rough relationship with the people you are inviting or you are being overly negative about this. I have had 2 issues (the one mentioned above and one friend adding on a "guest") out of 200+ invites. And you know what... it's annoying for about a day... you make a few snarky posts on the knot... get some great feedback... then you get over it. No big deal.

You might want to lighten up a bit...

Politely call your guests who have forgotten (or slacked off, procrastinated, whatever... who knows? Maybe their invite or RSVP got lost in the mail- it happens) to RSVP... it's annoying to have to babysit adults, yes. But most of the people who have neglected to send theirs in (so far) are people that I really truly want to be there. Why would I just assume they were not coming? It's a quick 2 minute phone call... they usually apologize profusely then say whether they are or are not coming (and some of them may still not know b/c of financial or travel issues) No big deal!!!

this is a wedding and a party/reception afterwards... not the social event of the year- as far as having a bouncer stop people at the door who didn't RSVP... really doesn't make you look like a gracious host. And protect yourself from what? Friends and family who want to share your wedding day with you? Come on girl.... chill out. You are veering toward bridezilla-ville.... don't do it!!!

A new level of class....

Re: A new level of class....

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