Pre-wedding Parties

Bride paying for her way at Bachelorette party

The bride for the wedding I am a bridesmaid for suggested a trip for her bachelorette party. It is fairly expensive and while I can pay for myself paying for the bride is pretty impossible. There are only 2 bridesmaids in the wedding. So to pay for this trip, then a shower and for the actual wedding, it would be a lot of money. I was thinking of how I could make it work and when I mentioned to the bride about booking the trip she said to me, without me saying a word, that she would never let us pay her way, she would pay. Now we would pay for her drinks, dinner all that other stuff once we got there. But the actual lodging costs she is also going to split the cost with the rest of us. I feel terrible about her paying. I mean if it were an overnight trip fairly local, I would gladly foot the bill. Is it rude to let her pay for her lodging there?

Re: Bride paying for her way at Bachelorette party

  • moh459 said:
    The bride for the wedding I am a bridesmaid for suggested a trip for her bachelorette party. It is fairly expensive and while I can pay for myself paying for the bride is pretty impossible. There are only 2 bridesmaids in the wedding. So to pay for this trip, then a shower and for the actual wedding, it would be a lot of money. I was thinking of how I could make it work and when I mentioned to the bride about booking the trip she said to me, without me saying a word, that she would never let us pay her way, she would pay. Now we would pay for her drinks, dinner all that other stuff once we got there. But the actual lodging costs she is also going to split the cost with the rest of us. I feel terrible about her paying. I mean if it were an overnight trip fairly local, I would gladly foot the bill. Is it rude to let her pay for her lodging there?
    I don't think it's rude at all.  Especially since she's the one the came up with the expensive trip idea.  
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    southernbelle0915catmiss9majadiria
  • If she suggested a trip, I don't think it's rude to take her up on her offer when she says "this is what I want to do and I'm prepared to pay my own way." 

    If the trip is too much for even just you (not even thinking about the bride's costs), you may want to suggest something else. Something local that you could fully host without worrying about money.
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  • photokittyphotokitty where I want to be mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    Personally I think that if  a bride wants a destination bachelorette party she should pay for her travel nd accommodations. I would expect to pay for her drinks and dinner out one, maybe two nights. I would expect everyone to pay for all their other meals. 

    Like SBelle said, if it's cost prohibitive you can totally tell her the 2 of you can't swing a DBP - and telling her would not be at all rude. Plan what you can afford and don't feel pressured to spend more than that :)
    :kiss: ~xoxo~ :kiss:

  • AddieCakeAddieCake Beyond the Wall member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    I agree. I would not pay for travel or lodging for her.
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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