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self unting

Knottie48946990Knottie48946990 newb
in Wedding Vows & Ceremony Discussions
my fiance and I are self uniting on June 20,2014, we got our marriage license in Bucks County but, plan on having our reunion in Delaware County, will we still be recognized as a married couple, or do we have to get married in the county we applied for a license in?  
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Re: self unting

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    daria24daria24 member
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    In PA you can get your license in any county, it doesn't matter which county your marriage is taking place. We got our self-uniting license on Chester County but got married in Lancaster.
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    emmyg65emmyg65 member
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    As PP said, PA marriage licenses in are valid in all PA counties.
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    GerbertmcwayGerbertmcway member
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    @daria24‌ @emmyg65‌ Do you girls know if it's true that some counties require you to prove that you're a Quaker or some other religion that requires self-uniting ceremonies? Because I am not, but would still like to self-unite. Also, did you have an "officiant" for your ceremony or did you do it yourselves?
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    emmyg65emmyg65 member
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    They might try, but it's illegal. Self-uniting marriages are available to all PA residents, regardless of their religion, and it violates separation of church and state to do otherwise. When I was reading about the license, I read that some counties are harder than others. We got ours in Chester County, which has a large Quaker population, so it wasn't any trouble at all. You might want to keep this on hand just in case: http://www.aclupa.org/our-work/legal/legaldocket/couplerefusedselfunitingma/

    We did not have an "officiant" (or MC) for our ceremony, because we actually had a Quaker ceremony. But either way is fine. They just wouldn't sign anything, unless it's as a witness. 

    Sometimes it's easier to think about having an MC because self-uniting marriages are so unusual and it's hard to comprehend how the ceremony might work. But having done it, it's really not that different and it's actually totally, totally awesome to marry yourselves without anyone else's instruction or lead. It just feels really special and intimate.
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    daria24daria24 member
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    As @emmyg65 said, it's illegal for them to ask you if you are Quaker. We are atheists, but Chester County didn't even bat an eyelash when we asked for the license. We went to the court house a day earlier than we needed to (we live out of state) JIC there was an issue, we were prepared to go into Philadelphia where we were pretty much guaranteed not to have a problem. But it wasn't an issue. 

    We didn't have an MC-we wrote an opening greeting which our BM & MOH read. Then we had two readings, each read by a family member/friend. We each read our vows, did the ring exchange, signed the license with our two witnesses, and pronounced ourselves. We had a blurb in our program explaining the ceremony, as well as the origins (because our families were convinced that it wasn't legal. It's been legal since before PA was a Commonwealth!). 

    There's no right way or wrong way, if you feel more comfortable with an MC, go ahead!
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    GerbertmcwayGerbertmcway member
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    Great, I am also getting my license in Chester county so I should be fine. Thanks for your help!
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    [Deleted User][Deleted User] member
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    edited June 2014
    THANK you all for this thread and all the helpful information (Daria24 and emmyg65)!!

    I'm getting married in Sept. and my fiance is an atheist (I'm more or less spiritual) and we knew we didn't want some random clergy(wo)man performing our ceremony.  The plan was to have my sister ordained online, so that she could perform the ceremony.  But after a little more research last night we found out about the self-uniting license (we live in Philly).  So now we can still have my sister MC the ceremony, but it'll be less of a hassle (without all of the ordination red tape).  Plus, I think it's pretty cool that we'll be doing it on our own.

    Thanks again!!!
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    emmyg65emmyg65 member
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    Glad to be of help! Your solution will work well, especially because online ordinations aren't valid in Pennsylvania. Congrats and have fun!
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