To Kick People Out or Keep Them In

Chojnals14 · July 2014

So it's now 4 days before my wedding and everything bad has happened so far. We have the mother of the groom in a lot of pain due to a back surgery a week and a half ago, we have a pastor who is ill and in Zambia, and a new pre-mature baby born within my fiances family. On top of it I do not have any of my family members coming and as the days go by more and more guests keep dropping (mind you we had a small guest list of 51 that dropped to 40 within the past few weeks). Though what I really need help with is if I should or should not kick out our Maid of Honor, Best Man, Flower Girl, and Ring Bearer. The maid of honor and best man decided that during the rehearsal dinner, that is on the 4th of July, to go to another party during that time and it isn't for either of their families. Not only that, but they decided for the bachelor and bachelorette party that we should just go out for bowling which my fiance has never liked doing and we already talked with them about going to a local casino at the bridal shower. As for the ring bearer and flower girl the mother of the two children involved told us yesterday that we should have eloped, decided not to have them wear dress shoes to the wedding instead she is going to have them wearing flip flops and sneakers, she has not paid for either of their attire yet which I had to pay for, and she's causing problems with the photographer by confusing them about the schedule. I'm freaking out and at this point my fiance and I don't know what to do especially with so little time to make changes. HELP!

lilacck28 · July 2014

Chojnals14 said:

So it's now 4 days before my wedding and everything bad has happened so far. We have the mother of the groom in a lot of pain due to a back surgery a week and a half ago, we have a pastor who is ill and in Zambia, and a new pre-mature baby born within my fiances family. On top of it I do not have any of my family members coming and as the days go by more and more guests keep dropping (mind you we had a small guest list of 51 that dropped to 40 within the past few weeks). Though what I really need help with is if I should or should not kick out our Maid of Honor, Best Man, Flower Girl, and Ring Bearer. The maid of honor and best man decided that during the rehearsal dinner, that is on the 4th of July, to go to another party during that time and it isn't for either of their families. Not only that, but they decided for the bachelor and bachelorette party that we should just go out for bowling which my fiance has never liked doing and we already talked with them about going to a local casino at the bridal shower. As for the ring bearer and flower girl the mother of the two children involved told us yesterday that we should have eloped, decided not to have them wear dress shoes to the wedding instead she is going to have them wearing flip flops and sneakers, she has not paid for either of their attire yet which I had to pay for, and she's causing problems with the photographer by confusing them about the schedule. I'm freaking out and at this point my fiance and I don't know what to do especially with so little time to make changes. HELP!

STUCK IN BOX

Okay. First of all, deep breaths. In and Out. In and out. It's all going to be okay. You are going to be married to your fiance. That is what is most important.

As for:
1 People not being able to come to the wedding: That stinks, but there's nothing you can do about it. Be happy that some people are coming, but don't let people not being able to make it cause you to feel overly upset.

2. family issues, health issues, baby issues, etc: that stinks. plain and simple. But again, nothing you can do other than be there for your family.

3. your MOH/ BM issues: Your rehearsal dinner and bachelorette/ bachelor parties are not the top priority of your best man or maid of honor. They just aren't. No one will care about your wedding as much as you and your fiance. They must really want to go to the other party, but your rehearsal dinner is on that day, so they are going to both. And its not your wedding they are leaving early, just the rehearsal dinner. The bachelor/ bachelorette parties are being thrown by your MOH and BM, so they get to decide what they are doing. Going to a casino sounds like it is possibly more expensive to travel to than going bowling. Or maybe someone has a gambling addiction or aversion that you are unaware of. You and your fiance don't get to dictate what the party someone is being very generous to throw in your honor is. You can mention that you really don't like bowling, so maybe could they come up with something else? But that's all you can do. If they still want to host a bowling party you either go, or you tell them that you will not be attending.

4. your flower girl/ ring bearer issues: it stinks, again, that the parents of your flower girl and ring bearer have not paid you back for their attire. I would not have paid to begin with because things like that can happen. Is there a chance that they perceived the outfits to be gifts? You may want to clear that up. Other than taking them to small claims court, which I would not recommend because it is quite the hassle for probably not THAT much money, there's nothing you can do. As for their shoes-- if you wanted certain shoes for them, you would need to pay for them. And flip flops and sneakers are probably a lot more comfortable for the kids, which silver lining! means they have a greater shot at walking down the aisle and behaving rather than tripping or throwing a tantrum because their feet hurt.

5. you can't kick out anyone from your wedding party without causing a great deal of damage to those relationships, if not ending them. If you want to maintain friendships/ happy family relations (I don't know how or if these people are related to you), then you bite your tongue, drink some wine or eat some cake, and remember that you are getting married soon! and that it is going to be a wonderful day where you will probably be so blissful that you forget all about this other stuff.

mysticl · July 2014

I am very sorry for everything you have going on and it has to be overwhelming to deal with so many negative things at one time. With that being said your wedding party isn't obligated to attend the rehearsal dinner. They just need to attend the wedding and it's helpful if they attend the actual rehearsal but the dinner isn't mandatory for them. And you are holding it on a holiday, I'm not surprised people have other things going on. You don't get to plan your bachelor/bachelorette party. If you don't like bowling you should have just declined. Kicking the kids out of the wedding will hurt them. They won't understand that it is because of their mother they will just know that you are rejecting them. In the grand scheme of things the shoes are no big deal. Your photographer should only be talking to you or your FI. Contact them and explain they are not discuss plans or scheduling with anyone else.

Chojnals14 · July 2014

Well there are a couple of details that I should have also included like:

-I know the rehearsal dinner isn't a big deal for them, but they are the only part of our wedding party. We don't have groomsmen or bridesmaids. Plus they tried to get us to reschedule the entire day just so they could go. I mean they agreed to be a part of this day and they knew about this months in advanced. There is no real reason why they can't be there for us.

-As for the bachelor and bachelorette party, they talked about this for months as being a big deal to them and they had grand plans for it then they decided to not follow through with it. Also, there isn't issues with gambling or anything like that. As for the casino it's not at all far from where we live and we used to go with them when we were in college for dinners. They didn't even tell us what we were doing until today and we still don't know what times. Plus they know that it's hard to get bowling lanes in our area.

-In terms of the mother of the FL and RB she was the one who picked out their attire and approved the prices knowing that she would be paying me back. It's been months since I've ordered their attire and they have it currently. The grooms mother even has offered to pay us the money for it and then go after her for it. As for the shoes she already has them for the kids, but isn't going to bother to use them for the wedding. The mother is also trying to get us to pay for lunch the day of the wedding for her entire family of 7 and keeps trying to get us to make changes to the wedding day schedule for not only this, but so there won't be pre-ceremony pictures that the photographer wants to do so the day of the wedding we can shorten our list of pictures after the ceremony.

mysticl · July 2014

These still aren't reasons to kick people out. Especially the kids. They didn't do anything to you.

Chojnals14 · July 2014

I do understand that and I really really don't want to kick out my future nieces and nephews and I know it's not their fault. Trust me I do and I care for them very much. Also, I don't like the idea of kicking out the maid of honor and the best man either that both my fiance and I have known as well as roomed with for years. So what is a good reason to kick someone out of the wedding then if these are not?

mysticl · July 2014

Chojnals14 said:

I do understand that and I really really don't want to kick out my future nieces and nephews and I know it's not their fault. Trust me I do and I care for them very much. Also, I don't like the idea of kicking out the maid of honor and the best man either that both my fiance and I have known as well as roomed with for years. So what is a good reason to kick someone out of the wedding then if these are not?

Physically attacking you, sleeping with your FI, etc. Kicking someone out of your wedding can be a relationship ending move so you should only do it if their behavior is to the point that you never want anything to do with them again.

mysticl · July 2014

Chojnals14 said:

Well there are a couple of details that I should have also included like:

-I know the rehearsal dinner isn't a big deal for them, but they are the only part of our wedding party. We don't have groomsmen or bridesmaids. Plus they tried to get us to reschedule the entire day just so they could go. I mean they agreed to be a part of this day and they knew about this months in advanced. There is no real reason why they can't be there for us.

-As for the bachelor and bachelorette party, they talked about this for months as being a big deal to them and they had grand plans for it then they decided to not follow through with it. Also, there isn't issues with gambling or anything like that. As for the casino it's not at all far from where we live and we used to go with them when we were in college for dinners. They didn't even tell us what we were doing until today and we still don't know what times. Plus they know that it's hard to get bowling lanes in our area.

-In terms of the mother of the FL and RB she was the one who picked out their attire and approved the prices knowing that she would be paying me back. It's been months since I've ordered their attire and they have it currently. The grooms mother even has offered to pay us the money for it and then go after her for it. As for the shoes she already has them for the kids, but isn't going to bother to use them for the wedding. The mother is also trying to get us to pay for lunch the day of the wedding for her entire family of 7 and keeps trying to get us to make changes to the wedding day schedule for not only this, but so there won't be pre-ceremony pictures that the photographer wants to do so the day of the wedding we can shorten our list of pictures after the ceremony.

First bold: You also have a flower girl and ring bearer. They and their parents should also be included in the rehearsal dinner.

Second bold: You don't have to do any of that. Though could she be wanting to shorten the pictures because she knows her kids won't last through a ton of pictures and the ceremony.

Chojnals14 · July 2014

Well the moh hasn't helped with the wedding at all and gives me responses like do what you want and she didn't help me with any of my diy projects that I had for the wedding. I did all of them myself with no help including my monogram for my aisle runner, folded napkins, unfolded the pom poms for the pews, made a card box, etc. With the bachelor and bachelorette party we did tell them they didn't have to have one, but they kept insisting on it and kept taunting us with grand ideas like going to the casino. You can't just talk about something and offer it then decide last minute to just go bowling. When I told her that neither my fiance or I wanted to go bowling and questioned about the casino idea she said she thought we were joking about that idea even though she was the one to give us that idea.

As for the other party that they are going to is not family related at all and the only reason they said they want to go is because the couple that is hosting it is having a wedding that they are planning on going to in September. Mind you we don't get to see them that much and we would really like to catch up with them. I didn't even really get to talk to my moh at the bridal shower other than for the games she conducted.

Also, the mother of the flower girl and the ring bearer told my fiance and I to elope and confused our photographer about the schedule for the entire wedding day even after I sent everyone a formal word document with times and places on it. Might I add she already ruined my birthday a few days ago by having my entire fiances family come to a random cookout and another party the day before the rehearsal dinner when I can't come that she moved last week. She's tried to tell the people at the church that we are getting married at that it's an open invitation wedding that everyone is invited to that we don't know when we specifically sent out invitations to people that we wanted there and not the entire congregation. Again she didn't come to the bridal shower or the rescheduled one and had a huge blow out fight with the groom's mother (who mind you was having back surgery during this time).

Chojnals14 · July 2014

Also, the kids are school aged children and are between the ages of 5-6 so they should be able to do a few pictures. I honestly don't have that many just a few with me, the maid of honor, and the flower girl so that isn't the issue. The photographer has even told me that they were surprised there wasn't that many.

Chojnals14 · July 2014

I guess all in all I feel like the maid of honor and the best man are choosing someone else over us and not giving attention to things like the bachelorette and bachelor party after they said they would do it. It just seems like the bowling thing was a quick fix idea. Also, what really set me off about them trying to go to another party was how they were trying to get us to change the whole day worth of plans around because of this other party. As for the mother of the flower girl and ring bearer keep trying to sabotage the wedding all together because she isn't the center of attention, but is trying to make it be.

Viczaesar · July 2014

Chojnals14 said:

Well the moh hasn't helped with the wedding at all and gives me responses like do what you want and she didn't help me with any of my diy projects that I had for the wedding. So? It's not her job to do any work for your wedding. Maid of Honor means the person to whom you are closest, not chief bridal bitch. I did all of them myself with no help including my monogram for my aisle runner, folded napkins, unfolded the pom poms for the pews, made a card box, etc. The only people responsible for doing your DIY projects are you and your FI. With the bachelor and bachelorette party we did tell them they didn't have to have one, but they kept insisting on it and kept taunting us with grand ideas like going to the casino. You can't just talk about something and offer it then decide last minute to just go bowling. Apparently you can. When I told her that neither my fiance or I wanted to go bowling and questioned about the casino idea she said she thought we were joking about that idea even though she was the one to give us that idea. Then you just say thanks but no thanks for the bowling. You don't get to plan your own bachelor/bachelorette parties. If you don't like what's planned, turn it down gracefully. Like it or not, they're not offering the casino.

As for the other party that they are going to is not family related at all and the only reason they said they want to go is because the couple that is hosting it is having a wedding that they are planning on going to in September. So? They can choose to spend their holiday wherever they want. It's a holiday. Mind you we don't get to see them that much and we would really like to catch up with them. I didn't even really get to talk to my moh at the bridal shower other than for the games she conducted. Still doesn't mean that you get to force them to spend the 4th with you.

Also, the mother of the flower girl and the ring bearer told my fiance and I to elope and confused our photographer about the schedule for the entire wedding day even after I sent everyone a formal word document with times and places on it. So? Irrelevant. Might I add she already ruined my birthday a few days ago by having my entire fiances family come to a random cookout and another party the day before the rehearsal dinner when I can't come that she moved last week. I don't really understand, but sounds irrelevant too. She's tried to tell the people at the church that we are getting married at that it's an open invitation wedding that everyone is invited to that we don't know when we specifically sent out invitations to people that we wanted there and not the entire congregation. Are you getting married at the church? Again she didn't come to the bridal shower or the rescheduled one and had a huge blow out fight with the groom's mother (who mind you was having back surgery during this time). Didn't you just say that you didn't talk to her at the shower as much as you would have liked? Are you talking about another shower(s?)? Pre-wedding parties are optional.

Viczaesar · July 2014

Chojnals14 said:

I guess all in all I feel like the maid of honor and the best man are choosing someone else over us and not giving attention to things like the bachelorette and bachelor party after they said they would do it. It just seems like the bowling thing was a quick fix idea. Also, what really set me off about them trying to go to another party was how they were trying to get us to change the whole day worth of plans around because of this other party. As for the mother of the flower girl and ring bearer keep trying to sabotage the wedding all together because she isn't the center of attention, but is trying to make it be.

You get one day. You don't get everybody's attention at all times in the days leading up to your wedding. None of these are things that justify the horribly rude and friendship-ending move of kicking people out of your wedding.

Chojnals14 · July 2014

I understand that the moh or anyone else is my slave. Trust me I'm not even saying that. I just thought I could at least get some help with things and not just from the moh, but the grooms family that I live with. Aren't brides suppose to get any help for these sorts of things? I've literally had to do everything myself and my fiance hasnt helped either. I'm also not trying to plan my own party, but if it was the other way around I would be taking them to the casino or take them some where that isn't a whole in the wall. I'm also not someone who usually wants attention. Trust me I've ran conferences and all sorts of large events and I'm always the last person to want any of that, but the day before the wedding is important because we will be rehearsing everything and the rehearsal dinner is a 4th of July party for all of the people who are going to also be at the wedding. My fiance's parents usually do this party every year and we didn't make any changes to it because of the fact that it's also the rehearsal dinner. I mean I have gifts to give them for crying out loud and I wont be able to because of this other party.

Viczaesar · July 2014

Chojnals14 said:

I understand that the moh or anyone else is my slave. Trust me I'm not even saying that. I just thought I could at least get some help with things and not just from the moh, but the grooms family that I live with. Aren't brides suppose to get any help for these sorts of things? I've literally had to do everything myself and my fiance hasnt helped either. I'm also not trying to plan my own party, but if it was the other way around I would be taking them to the casino or take them some where that isn't a whole in the wall. I'm also not someone who usually wants attention. Trust me I've ran conferences and all sorts of large events and I'm always the last person to want any of that, but the day before the wedding is important because we will be rehearsing everything and the rehearsal dinner is a 4th of July party for all of the people who are going to also be at the wedding. My fiance's parents usually do this party every year and we didn't make any changes to it because of the fact that it's also the rehearsal dinner. I mean I have gifts to give them for crying out loud and I wont be able to because of this other party.

No. If your FI hasn't helped with his wedding that's something you should take up with him, but nobody else is required to help you with your wedding. Give them their gifts some other time. You're seriously making a mountain out of a molehill.

LondonLisa · July 2014

The problem here is your expectations vs reality. Health/cancellation issues aside, why would you want to kick them out? Do you want to "teach them a lesson"? There is only one result of kicking someone out of your wedding: permanent, irreparable end of relationship. If you want to forever end the relationship with your MoH and BM, go ahead, but that seems silly and petty.

You chose to have your RD on a holiday. You chose to have DIY projects. Pre-wedding parties are a gift and no one is entitled to one. This may seem harsh, but from this post it seems like you are wanting to be a victim when it is actually a situation you created. You are upset when everyone else isn't as excited or available to celebrate you and your wedding.

You need to stop scripting how you want your wedding to be and then getting upset when people don't live up to your unrealistic expectations.

Maggie0829 · July 2014

I'm sorry but I just can't believe that there are so many brides/grooms out there that are really willing to kick their close friends or family members out of their wedding for such petty shit. And on top of that, to kick little kids out of a wedding who have done absolutely nothing wrong. What the hell is wrong with people?!

Your wedding is not a place of employment. You cannot "fire", "demote" or "kick people out" without hurting their feelings and your relationship with them immensley. Your wedding does not come first in their lives.

mysticl · July 2014

Chojnals14 said:

I understand that the moh or anyone else is my slave. Trust me I'm not even saying that. I just thought I could at least get some help with things and not just from the moh, but the grooms family that I live with. Aren't brides suppose to get any help for these sorts of things? Yes, from the groom or people you hire to do it. It is not up to anyone else to help you with your wedding. Of course it is nice of them to offer but they don't have to. I've literally had to do everything myself and my fiance hasnt helped either. Were you up front with him about the DIY stuff? Did he have input and agree to help or did you just come up with this stuff on your own and then expect him to help?I'm also not trying to plan my own party, but if it was the other way around I would be taking them to the casino or take them some where that isn't a whole in the wall. I understand being disappointed when you thought they were planning one thing and they were just joking but like it has been said before if you don't want to go bowling, don't go bowling. I'm also not someone who usually wants attention. Trust me I've ran conferences and all sorts of large events and I'm always the last person to want any of that, but the day before the wedding is important because we will be rehearsing everything and the rehearsal dinner is a 4th of July party for all of the people who are going to also be at the wedding. My fiance's parents usually do this party every year and we didn't make any changes to it because of the fact that it's also the rehearsal dinner. So you aren't actually having a rehearsal dinner, you are having a party that happens every single year and just combined your rehearsal dinner with it. No wonder they don't see missing it as that big of a deal. It's nothing special at all. I mean I have gifts to give them for crying out loud and I wont be able to because of this other party. Well that is true if your rehearsal dinner is the last time you were ever going to see them in their entire lives but since they are in the wedding you just give them their gifts then, or you could give them their gifts at the actual rehearsal, or at any other time.

artbyallie · July 2014

Stop making excuses. Their only task is to be in the wedding in the attire you have chosen. If they do that, yay. If not, they take themselves out of the wedding.

Think about this for just a minute. If you kick them out, you will be in their minds and those of anyone else they tell (and they will) that Bridezilla. You will effectively end your relationship with them and particularly since these people seem to be family, that will make future gatherings really difficult and awkward for all involved.

Jen4948 · July 2014

The only "job" any wedding attendant has is to show up in the designated outfit on time, sober, and in good spirits.

They are not required to shop, plan or attend parties for you (not even showers, rehearsal dinners, or bachelor/ette parties) or do DIY projects for you. If you're expecting this of them then you need to scale back your expectations.

It sucks that so many people are declining to attend your wedding and have other problems but there's nothing you can do about it, so don't make it harder on yourself by dwelling on it.

climbingsingle · July 2014

These are not offenses you should be kicking people out for. Relax and have a glass of wine. Jeez.

holyguacamole79 · July 2014

One of our flower girls wore flip flops to our wedding (which I only realized after looking at pictures).

My husband & I are still happily married. I promise you, on the day of your wedding, you won't notice stuff like that.

KatWAG · July 2014

Chojnals14 said:

I understand that the moh or anyone else is my slave. Trust me I'm not even saying that. I just thought I could at least get some help with things and not just from the moh, but the grooms family that I live with. Apparently not, it doesnt sound like they have any interest in helping. which is fine. Its your wedding and your responsiblity.Aren't brides suppose to get any help for these sorts of things? If you want help, hire someone. I've literally had to do everything myself and my fiance hasnt helped either. Then have a serious talk with your fi. I would have I'm also not trying to plan my own party, but if it was the other way around I would be taking them to the casino or take them some where that isn't a whole in the wall. I'm also not someone who usually wants attention. I am having a hard time believing this. Trust me I've ran conferences and all sorts of large events and I'm always the last person to want any of that, but the day before the wedding is important because we will be rehearsing everything and the rehearsal dinner is a 4th of July party for all of the people who are going to also be at the wedding. Do you really need to practice? Is your ceremony that complex? My fiance's parents usually do this party every year and we didn't make any changes to it because of the fact that it's also the rehearsal dinner. I mean I have gifts to give them for crying out loud and I wont be able to because of this other party.

@chojnals14 you need to step away from pinterest and 4 weddings. While it would be great if people offered to help, they didnt. It is your and your fi's sole responsibilty. And the fact that you want to kick out your future niece and nephew over shoes blows my mind.

MairePoppy · July 2014

Since you can't force anyone, including the MOH and BM, to attend your rehearsal, cancel it. Most ceremonies are fairly straightforward and don't require rehearsing. You and fi can meet with your officiant and give everyone their instructions the morning of the wedding. No rehearsal + no rehearsal dinner. That leaves you free to attend your parents traditional 4th of July party.

If you don't like the plans that your MOH and BM are making for your BP, politely decline. You and your fi can go out to dinner and the casino, without them.

Flower Girl and Ring bearer. The parents are wrong to renege on paying you for the their outfits. You could remind her, but it sounds like she's not going to pay. Since they have the outfits, you don't have a lot of leverage. I would request that the children wear nice shoes, not flip flops and sneakers, but if the mother doesn't comply, let it go. It seems mean spirited to kick the kids out of your wedding party. It's not their fault that their mother is a PITA.

Photographer - let the photographer know that no one, but you, has the authority to make changes to the wedding day schedule. If the kids can't attend your photo session, take pictures without them. You can get shots of them after the ceremony or during the reception. NBD.

I'm sorry that things aren't working out the way you planned. You planned a 4th of July wedding weekend, thinking it would be fun for everyone. Now, you're finding out that some of your key players don't want to devote the entire holiday weekend to your wedding and related events and they aren't breaking any etiquette rules by declining to do so.

mysticl · July 2014

MairePoppy said:

Since you can't force anyone, including the MOH and BM, to attend your rehearsal, cancel it. Most ceremonies are fairly straightforward and don't require rehearsing. You and fi can meet with your officiant and give everyone their instructions the morning of the wedding. No rehearsal + no rehearsal dinner. That leaves you free to attend your parents traditional 4th of July party.

If you don't like the plans that your MOH and BM are making for your BP, politely decline. You and your fi can go out to dinner and the casino, without them.

Flower Girl and Ring bearer. The parents are wrong to renege on paying you for the their outfits. You could remind her, but it sounds like she's not going to pay. Since they have the outfits, you don't have a lot of leverage. I would request that the children wear nice shoes, not flip flops and sneakers, but if the mother doesn't comply, let it go. It seems mean spirited to kick the kids out of your wedding party. It's not their fault that their mother is a PITA.

Photographer - let the photographer know that no one, but you, has the authority to make changes to the wedding day schedule. If the kids can't attend your photo session, take pictures without them. You can get shots of them after the ceremony or during the reception. NBD.

I'm sorry that things aren't working out the way you planned. You planned a 4th of July wedding weekend, thinking it would be fun for everyone. Now, you're finding out that some of your key players don't want to devote the entire holiday weekend to your wedding and related events and they aren't breaking any etiquette rules by declining to do so.

They aren't having a rehearsal dinner. They are attending the regularly planned 4th of July party and calling it the rehearsal dinner.

jneen101 · July 2014

Chojnals14 said:

Aren't brides suppose to get any help for these sorts of things? I've literally had to do everything myself and my fiance hasnt helped either.

Brides are supposed to get help from the fiances. What is your fiances deal that he can't help with literally anything? Congrats on the wedding.

MyNameIsNot · July 2014

Why is it that your FI gets a total pass, but you're willing to end your relationship with with your closest friend when she doesn't help you with DIY projects? If your FI refuses to help you with things, take it up with him. Don't take it out on your innocent friend.

lc07 · July 2014

Thank God PPs have me covered on all the other crazy.

I just want to add that as a small child I had abnormal feet. They were super narrow. Nothing fit me. All pictures of me as a child while wearing a dress show me in sneakers with velcro. That's what fit. I was a damned adorable kid. And I was smiling and happy in those photos. If you're going to harp on my shoes, I'd rather not have you in my life.

mysticl · July 2014

lc07 said:

Thank God PPs have me covered on all the other crazy.

I just want to add that as a small child I had abnormal feet. They were super narrow. Nothing fit me. All pictures of me as a child while wearing a dress show me in sneakers with velcro. That's what fit. I was a damned adorable kid. And I was smiling and happy in those photos. If you're going to harp on my shoes, I'd rather not have you in my life.

I was at a wedding where the ring bearer ended up wearing his light up sneakers. If you didn't know, you didn't notice. Dress shoes had been made available for him but they didn't fit and this wasn't discovered until the day of (I think they had been rented with his tux so they didn't get them till that day or the day before). So they had to work with what they had.

mysticl · July 2014

flantastic said:

mysticl said:

lc07 said:

Thank God PPs have me covered on all the other crazy.

I just want to add that as a small child I had abnormal feet. They were super narrow. Nothing fit me. All pictures of me as a child while wearing a dress show me in sneakers with velcro. That's what fit. I was a damned adorable kid. And I was smiling and happy in those photos. If you're going to harp on my shoes, I'd rather not have you in my life.

I was at a wedding where the ring bearer ended up wearing his light up sneakers. If you didn't know, you didn't notice. Dress shoes had been made available for him but they didn't fit and this wasn't discovered until the day of (I think they had been rented with his tux so they didn't get them till that day or the day before). So they had to work with what they had.

I'm not having a RB or FG (FI's oldest nephew or niece will be 3 and we'd rather not deal with them being really too young) but seeing a kid wear light-up sneakers with a tux would be AWESOME.

Outdoor wedding, middle of the day, bright and sunny. You couldn't see the lights and the shoes were black so you didn't notice.

To Kick People Out or Keep Them In

Re: To Kick People Out or Keep Them In

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