40-Plus Brides

Already A Bridezilla?

Some time ago, I was discussing with a friend of mine about my upcoming marriage.  At this point I had not formally asked her.

I said that since I was an older bride, I did not expect my bridal party to go to a bridal shop and pick out dresses.  Instead, I told her that I would want my bridesmaides to wear blue, and it either be a one/two piece dress or skirt in jacket.

She went nuts!  She right out told me that she was unemployed (at the time) and that she doesn't wear dresses.  She also said that if I made the other person the MOH, she would be pissed!

So am I being the bad lady here, making two simple requests?  I took in the fact that she was unemployed (but her husband works) and for that matter she could have went to the Salvation Army or a resale shop to find a dress.  About 20 years ago, I had to buy an evening dress for a state function for the Daughters of the American Revolution.  I found a beautiful peach colored dress with lace jacket for $18 and took it to the dry cleaners for an additional $7.

Mind you, I stood up in this lady's wedding 30 years ago when I was unemployed. Mind you I was able to buy my dress and shoes, pay 1/4th of the shower expenses (as well as going in for a gift), plus a gift for the wedding.

When our mutual friend did not ask me to be in her wedding, my friend could not understand why she decided on her two future SIL's over me, she said that if I could be in the wedding, she she would bow out and just come as a guest.

Thoughts??

Re: Already A Bridezilla?

  • Those are really minor requests. No hideous satin monstrosity from David's Bridal? I'm in! :) Was she having a bad day? Or is this the kind of person she is? If it's the kind of person she is, you need to consider whether she's who you want up there with you on your big day. Hopefully she was just caught in a bad moment.
  • It wasn't like I was saying you need to have your hair and nails done at this particual place (and let them pay for it),  I don't think I was being unreasonable - if anything I remember how it was for me.  As for David's, I have seen their dresses and they seem more geared toward a more youthful group.

    I have known this lady since 1971.  And to be pissed if I made the other lady the MOH?  At that point I changed the subject.

    I'm now thinking of just eloping. Save myself a lot of heartache (and money to boot)!

    lizandmark2014
  • valkayevalkaye member
    10 Comments First Anniversary 5 Love Its
    edited July 2014
    don't elope if juts to avoid confrontation. It is your wedding and you ar entitled to have the wedding that you want. Anyone that is asked to be in a wedding, does know in advance before accepting, You;could if;you want offer to pay for the dress and have her pick up the other costs herself.
  • Well, at first I was considering a small wedding - about 50-75 people.  When I mentioned a budget of $500 for a wedding dress (probably from David's Bridal), she just about flipped!  Then she was telling me how her wedding dress was less than $100 - yeah, in 1959!

    Since then, a lot of people have passed on both sides.  There have some other issues that make me think it might be better to elope.

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