Readings

ShallowSeas · July 2014

FI and I are wanting some sort of small, unique reading for our ceremony. We don't want to use a verse from the Bible. We've been looking at lyrics from songs that we both like that might work, as well as poems and short readings we've found online. We like a quote we found from Captain Corelli's Mandolin that we have considered using. Does anyone know of any poems or quotes that we could possibly use?

eilis1228 · July 2014

I had to search for stuff like this for my boss last week. Her son is getting married at the end of the month, and she was asked to read something but didn't want anything too long or Biblical. Here are the suggestions I sent her:

If ever two were one, then surely we.
If ever man were lov'd by wife, then thee.
If ever wife was happy in a man,
Compare with me, ye women, if you can.
I prize thy love more than whole Mines of gold
Or all the riches that the East doth hold.
My love is such that Rivers cannot quench,
Nor ought but love from thee give recompence.
Thy love is such I can no way repay.
The heavens reward thee manifold, I pray.
Then while we live, in love let's so persevere
That when we live no more, we may live ever.
---anne bradstreet

Man and woman are like the earth, that brings forth flowers
in summer, and love, but underneath is rock.

Older than flowers, older than ferns, older than foraminiferae,
older than plasm altogether is the soul underneath.

And when, throughout all the wild chaos of love
slowly a gem forms, in the ancient, once-more-molten rocks
of two human hearts, two ancient rocks,
a man's heart and a woman's,
that is the crystal of peace, the slow hard jewel of trust,
the sapphire of fidelity.

The gem of mutual peace emerging from the wild chaos of love.

-D.H. Lawrence

i carry your heart with me (i carry it in
my heart) i am never without it (anywhere
i go you go, my dear; and whatever is done
by only me is your doing, my darling)
i fear
no fate (for you are my fate, my sweet) i want
no world (for beautiful you are my world, my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows
higher than soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart (i carry it in my heart)

-ee cummings

I cannot promise you a life of sunshine;
I cannot promise riches, wealth, or gold;
I cannot promise you an easy pathway
That leads away from change or growing old.
But I can promise all my heart's devotion;
A smile to chase away your tears of sorrow;
A love that's ever true and ever growing;
A hand to hold in yours through each tomorrow.

Author Unknown

Shakespeare also has a few sonnets that are good for weddings, but Shakespeare can be kinda tricky to read out loud.

eilis1228 · July 2014

I also love this poem by ee cummings, but I don't think it works as well as the other one I posted for weddings:

somewhere i have never travelled,gladly beyond
any experience,your eyes have their silence:
in your most frail gesture are things which enclose me,
or which i cannot touch because they are too near

your slightest look easily will unclose me
though i have closed myself as fingers,
you open always petal by petal myself as Spring opens
(touching skilfully,mysteriously) her first rose

or if your wish be to close me,i and
my life will shut very beautifully, suddenly,
as when the heart of this flower imagines
the snow carefully everywhere descending;

nothing which we are to perceive in this world equals
the power of your intense fragility: whose texture
compels me with the color of its countries,
rendering death and forever with each breathing

(i do not know what it is about you that closes
and opens; only something in me understands
the voice of your eyes is deeper than all roses)
nobody,not even the rain, has such small hands
---ee cummings

ShallowSeas · July 2014

@weewittlewizabeth thanks! I love those! Especially the D.H. Lawrence one

Pepperally · July 2014

I have totally joked to myself about using the lyrics to Led Zeppelin's "Thank You", which in many ways does sound like wedding vows, and surprising him during the ceremony...but I can't stop laughing when I think about it. We both like the band and it would be fitting in some respects, but just not sure how it would really work.

Anyway, sorry I'm of no help on this.

minskat30 · July 2014

How about To Love is Not to Possess, by James Kavanaugh?

ShallowSeas · July 2014

@pepperally haha that would be awesome! FI and I are huge Blink-182 and Ed Sheeran fans so we've been trying to find some lyrics from either one to use. Blink is a little hard, but there are some Ed Sheeran lyrics that could definitely work

ShallowSeas · July 2014

@minskat30 I don't think I know that one, but I will definitely be looking it up. Thanks!

Pepperally · July 2014

Oh, I just googled and found this site for non-religious readings: www.ceremonyofficiants.com/wedding-ceremony-readings

eilis1228 · July 2014

No prob! I think that one is my favorite too, but there are a few words that are difficult to pronounce in that one. My boss and I listed to an online pronunciation of foraminiferae and still couldn't figure out how to say it lol. My coworker and I told her to just change the word to something else since it's unlikely anyone knows that poem by heart.

Blue & White · July 2014

@weewittlewizabeth I can't believe your boss gets to pick the reading to read, haha. Every time I've done a reading at a wedding (apparently I'm good at such things and get asked a lot) the bride/groom tell me what to read. And it's ALWAYS "love is patient, love is kind" blah blah blah

eilis1228 · July 2014

Blue & White said:

@weewittlewizabeth I can't believe your boss gets to pick the reading to read, haha. Every time I've done a reading at a wedding (apparently I'm good at such things and get asked a lot) the bride/groom tell me what to read. And it's ALWAYS "love is patient, love is kind" blah blah blah

The MOB is reading that Corinthians verse. lol. Her son and FDIL seem pretty chill about the whole wedding overall. They're even letting her choose the song for the mother-son dance. My coworker and I spent one morning Googling readings and songs for her, which was pretty fun.

[Deleted User] · July 2014

We had two readings that were meaningful to us, but not religious in any way.

We had a couple we're close with who is already married read this one. We split up the lines between them. (you could also just do the 1st paragraph to shorten it.)

Excerpt from The Union, Robert Fulghum

You have known each other from the first glance of acquaintance to this point of commitment. At some point, you decided to marry. From that moment of yes, to this moment of yes, indeed, you have been making commitments in an informal way. All of those conversations that were held in a car, or over a meal, or during long walks – all those conversations that began with, “When we’re married”, and continued with “I will” and “you will” and “we will” – all those late night talks that included “someday” and “somehow” and “maybe” – and all those promises that are unspoken matters of the heart. All these common things, and more, are the real process of a wedding. The symbolic vows that you are about to make are a way of saying to one another, “You know all those things that we’ve promised, and hoped, and dreamed – well, I meant it all, every word.”

Look at one another and remember this moment in time. Before this moment you have been many things to one another – acquaintance, friend, companion, even teacher, for you have learned much from one another these past (however many) years. Shortly you shall say a few words that will take you across a threshold of life, and things between you will never quite be the same.

For after today you shall say to the world – This is my husband. This is my wife.

Here is another one we considered but didn't end up using:

Shall We Dance (Movie)

Why is it that people get married?
Because we need a witness to our lives.
There’s a billion people on the planet.
What does any one life really mean?
But in a marriage, you’re promising to care about everything…
The good things, the bad things, the terrible things, the mundane things,
All of it… all the time, every day.
You’re saying “Your life will not go unnoticed because I will notice it.
Your life will not go unwitnessed - because I will be your witness.”

Pepperally · July 2014

I'm digging this one and may ask to add this into our ceremony:

Pepperally · July 2014

Not working!From "The Irrational Season" by Madeleine L'Engle
But ultimately there comes a moment when a decision must be made. Ultimately two people who love each other must ask themselves how much they hope for as their love grows and deepens, and how much risk they are willing to take…It is indeed a fearful gamble…Because it is the nature of love to create, a marriage itself is something which has to be created, so that, together we become a new creature.

To marry is the biggest risk in human relations that a person can take…If we commit ourselves to one person for life this is not, as many people think, a rejection of freedom; rather it demands the courage to move into all the risks of freedom, and the risk of love which is permanent; into that love which is not possession, but participation…It takes a lifetime to learn another person…When love is not possession, but participation, then it is part of that co-creation which is our human calling, and which implies such risk that it is often rejected.

Swazzle · July 2014

My aunt read "Love" by Roy Croft at my wedding.

I love you, not only for what you are,
but what I am, when I am with you.

I love you not only for what you have made of yourself,
but what you are making of me.

I love you for the part of me that you bring out.

I love you for putting your hand into my heaped up heart
and passing over all the foolish and weak things
that you can’t help seeing there

And for drawing out into the light
all the beautiful belongings
that no one else has looked quite far enough to find.

I love you because you have done more
than any creed could have done to make me good,
and more than any fate could have done to make me happy.

You have done it without a touch,
without a word, without a sign.

You have done it by being yourself –
my companion and comforter, guide and friend.

The one I love.

ShallowSeas · July 2014

@allusive007 I love The Union!!!

Hummingbird125 · July 2014

allusive007 said:

We had two readings that were meaningful to us, but not religious in any way.
We had a couple we're close with who is already married read this one. We split up the lines between them. (you could also just do the 1st paragraph to shorten it.
Excerpt from The Union, Robert Fulghum
You have known each other from the first glance of acquaintance to this point of commitment. At some point, you decided to marry. From that moment of yes, to this moment of yes, indeed, you have been making commitments in an informal way. All of those conversations that were held in a car, or over a meal, or during long walks – all those conversations that began with, “When we’re married”, and continued with “I will” and “you will” and “we will” – all those late night talks that included “someday” and “somehow” and “maybe” – and all those promises that are unspoken matters of the heart. All these common things, and more, are the real process of a wedding. The symbolic vows that you are about to make are a way of saying to one another, “You know all those things that we’ve promised, and hoped, and dreamed – well, I meant it all, every word.”
Look at one another and remember this moment in time. Before this moment you have been many things to one another – acquaintance, friend, companion, even teacher, for you have learned much from one another these past (however many) years. Shortly you shall say a few words that will take you across a threshold of life, and things between you will never quite be the same.

For after today you shall say to the world – This is my husband. This is my wife.

I have that first one bookmarked for my wedding! I absolutely love it, and FI does too!

loves2shop4shoes · July 2014

I personally, have always loved Sonnet 116 from Shakespeare.

ETA: It reads:

Let me not to the marriage of true minds admit impediments.

Love is not love which alters when it alteration finds, or bends with the remover to remove. Oh, no! It is an ever-fixed mark that looks on tempests and is never shaken.

It is the star to every wandering bark, whose worth's unknown, although his height be taken.

Love's not Time's fool, though rosy lips and cheeks within his bending sickle's compass come; love alters not with his brief hours and weeks, but bears it out even to the edge of doom.

If this be error and upon me proved, I never writ, nor no man ever loved.

[Deleted User] · July 2014

@Severmille12 & @hummingbird125 - I loved that reading - I felt like it summed up all of our feelings toward what our wedding day meant to us. My girlfriend actually started crying as she read it, which of course made me cry. Thus this picture...

ShallowSeas · July 2014

@allusive007 I definitely teared up when I read it. Its very sweet and perfect.

lmcooper86 · July 2014

@allusive007 - Damn, making me get all teary at my desk! I love The Union...but if I'm getting all misty just reading it (10 months before my wedding) I might be doomed if I actually use it!

ShallowSeas · July 2014

I just emailed FI The Union and he said he liked it and got choked up reading it :')

[Deleted User] · July 2014

@Imcooper86 - I don't think it's the worst thing to be emotional on your wedding day. I was mad at myself for crying all the way down the aisle (I was great until I saw H and then I just couldn't hold it in). I AM NOT a cryer...so I really didn't expect it. I actually love those pics though...and our guests told me that they felt more for us as a couple because they could see how much we really cared for each other. Either way, you will be a gorgeous bride!

@severmille12 - I'm glad your FI likes it too!

beanbot2002 · July 2014

I do not love you as if you were salt-rose, or topaz,
or the arrow of carnations the fire shoots off.
I love you as certain dark things are to be loved,
in secret, between the shadow and the soul.

I love you as the plant that never blooms
but carries in itself the light of hidden flowers;
thanks to your love a certain solid fragrance,
risen from the earth, lives darkly in my body.

I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where.
I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride;
so I love you because I know no other way

than this: where I does not exist, nor you,
so close that your hand on my chest is my hand,
so close that your eyes close as I fall asleep.

Pablo Neruda

beanbot2002 · July 2014

this is also another favorite:

On Marriage
Kahlil Gibran

You were born together, and together you shall be forevermore.
You shall be together when the white wings of death scatter your days.
Ay, you shall be together even in the silent memory of God.
But let there be spaces in your togetherness,
And let the winds of the heavens dance between you.

Love one another, but make not a bond of love:
Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.
Fill each other's cup but drink not from one cup.
Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf
Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone,
Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music.

Give your hearts, but not into each other's keeping.
For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts.
And stand together yet not too near together:
For the pillars of the temple stand apart,
And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other's shadow.

lmcooper86 · July 2014

@allusive007 - That's the thing, I am not generally a crying person either but all of this wedding stuff keeps making me all teary! I'm sure I will cry when we get married, but I'm starting to worry a bit about exactly how much I might end up crying lol

cu97tiger · July 2014

allusive007 said:

Here is another one we considered but didn't end up using:
Shall We Dance (Movie)
Why is it that people get married?
Because we need a witness to our lives.
There’s a billion people on the planet.
What does any one life really mean?
But in a marriage, you’re promising to care about everything…
The good things, the bad things, the terrible things, the mundane things,
All of it… all the time, every day.
You’re saying “Your life will not go unnoticed because I will notice it.
Your life will not go unwitnessed - because I will be your witness.”

@allusive007 - I love this one!

We used:

"Sooner or Later" – Anonymous Sooner or later we begin to understand that love is more than verses on valentines, and romance in the movies. We begin to know that love is here and now, real and true, the most important thing in our lives. For love is the creator of our favorite memories, and the foundation of our fondest dreams. Love is a promise that is always kept, a fortune that can never be spent, a seed that can flourish in even the most unlikely of places. And this radiance that never fades, this mysterious and magical joy, is the greatest treasure of all -- one known only by those who love.

The Art of Marriage - Wilferd A. Peterson A good marriage must be created. In the art of marriage the little things are the big things...

It is never being too old to hold hands. It is remembering to say "I love you" at least once each day.

It is never going to sleep angry. It is having a mutual sense of values and common objectives. It is forming a circle of love that gathers in the whole family.

It is speaking words of appreciation and demonstrating gratitude in thoughtful ways. It is having the capacity to forgive and forget.

It is giving each other an atmosphere in which each can grow. It is finding room for the things of the spirit. It is a common search for the good and the beautiful.

It is not only marrying the right partner... It is being the right partner.

samboenda · July 2014

Pablo Neruda has a collection of love poems. My favorite is Sonnet LXIX (One of the few poems that is just as beautiful when translated to English).

Maybe nothingness is to be without your presence,

without you moving, slicing the noon

like a blue flower, without you walking

later through the fog and the cobbles,

without the light you carry in your hand,

golden, which maybe others will not see,

which maybe no one knew was growing

like the red beginnings of a rose.

In short, without your presence: without your coming

suddenly, incitingly, to know my life,

gust of a rosebush, wheat of wind:

since then I am because you are,

since then you are, I am, we are,

and through love I will be, you will be, we'll be.

GoldenPenguin · July 2014

I love "The Union," but I can't remember if FI's brother & SIL used it, so I need to find that out.

My sister is going to read "Falling in Love is Like Owning a Dog" - it's adorable, and totally fits us. We aren't using the whole thing though - we're cutting out the parts I've italicized.

How Falling in Love is like Owning a Dog
by Taylor Mali

First of all, it’s a big responsibility,
especially in a city like New York.
So think long and hard before deciding on love.
On the other hand, love gives you a sense of security:
when you’re walking down the street late at night
and you have a leash on love
ain’t no one going to mess with you.
Because crooks and muggers think love is unpredictable.
Who knows what love could do in its own defense?

On cold winter nights, love is warm.
It lies between you and lives and breathes
and makes funny noises.
Love wakes you up all hours of the night with its needs.
It needs to be fed so it will grow and stay healthy.

Love doesn’t like being left alone for long.
But come home and love is always happy to see you.
It may break a few things accidentally in its passion for life,
but you can never be mad at love for long.

Is love good all the time? No! No!
Love can be bad. Bad, love, bad! Very bad love.

Love makes messes.
Love leaves you little surprises here and there.
Love needs lots of cleaning up after.
Sometimes you just want to get love fixed.
Sometimes you want to roll up a piece of newspaper
and swat love on the nose,
not so much to cause pain,
just to let love know "Don’t you ever do that again!"

Sometimes love just wants to go out for a nice long walk.
Because love loves exercise. It will run you around the block
and leave you panting, breathless. Pull you in different directions
at once, or wind itself around and around you
until you’re all wound up and you cannot move.

But love makes you meet people wherever you go.
People who have nothing in common but love
stop and talk to each other on the street.

Throw things away and love will bring them back,
again, and again, and again.
But most of all, love needs love, lots of it.

And in return, love loves you and never stops.

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