Bridal Shower Etiquette Question

CA.Giraffe · July 2014

I'm attending a shower for a girl who is married to DH's best friend. (They are having a PPD, poor etiquette to have a shower, but I am attending.) The shower is lingerie-themed. I don't know the girl well, won't know another soul at this shower, and would prefer not to buy lingerie in this case - especially at the place where she's registered, it's a seedy local lingerie/novelty shop. I was also hoping not to give a gift card, it just seems a little impersonal for a shower.

The only time I see this girl is when we go hunting or shooting with our DHs. I was thinking about maybe getting her this:

http://www.vogtsilversmiths.com/mens-accessories/gift-items-1/pocket-knife-stilleto-high-heel-knife.html

Thinking a stiletto would still be kinda sexy, and the knife might be something she used. Am I overthinking this? Should I just get a gift card? Any other ideas?

[Deleted User] · July 2014

I think the entire situation is ridiculous. If you're going, I'd definitely get a gift. Since you have hunting/shooting in common, I actually think the stiletto knife is kinda cute. Or a camo bra/panty set.

kns1988 · July 2014

Wow, that's way out of my price range for a bridal shower gift. But if it's in your price range and you think she'd like it, you should go for it. You don't have to bring lingerie just because it's the theme. I do think it would be a little out of place to get her a vacuum cleaner or set of dish towels, but a novelty knife seems good.

misshart00 · July 2014

You could also get some body lotions and stuff. I usually throw something like that in there for lingerie showers.

[Deleted User] · July 2014

Yeah, wow, I didn't even see the price. I don't think I could spend that much on a bridal shower gift for a girl I barely knew. Did she actually REGISTER for lingerie? That seems bizarre. Go to the registry to find out her size, then buy her something from whatever store you'd like. I still think camo would be cute for someone you know through hunting. Maybe panties and matching camisole in a pink camo style. I REALLY don't think I'd be going to a lingerie party if I knew nobody there besides the bride. But then, I don't like showers of any kind for people I know really well.

WildMagelet · July 2014

I think the knife is fine and cute considering how you know each other. Do you guys deer hunt? I'd probably throw in some rope, a spreader bar and a Butt Out to be funny

CA.Giraffe · July 2014

Oh, I'm not planning on spending $200+. They make a $50 version with a resin or mother-of'pearl handle. That's much closer to my budget!

I actually don't like showers and have only been to two (including my own) in my 35 years on this planet. If it were anyone else, I would not attend...but DH has been best friends with her DH since fifth grade so I'm making an effort to get to know her a little better. As a side note - I was the only person, other than their parents and children, who attended their actual ceremony, since I work in the building where it was held and happened to see them.

mysticl · July 2014

Personally, I wouldn't go to the shower of someone I barely know. If she is into hunting I don't think that knife would be very practical. Silver tarnishes and that scroll work would be a pain to clean. I like the idea of bath stuff or maybe you could go with a satin robe.

futuremrsog15 · July 2014

For lingerie showers like this, I typically give this book:

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0965327523/ref=oh_details_o02_s00_i00?ie=UTF8&psc=1

So far all the brides have loved it!

misshart00 · July 2014

futuremrsog15 said:
For lingerie showers like this, I typically give this book:

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0965327523/ref=oh_details_o02_s00_i00?ie=UTF8&psc=1

So far all the brides have loved it!

Ooo, I would love something like that!

perdonami · July 2014

I was thinking a silk or satin robe too would be appropriate. Btw, You are being very kind and generous in whatever you chose to buy her for her PPD.

Do other guests know this is a PPD?

CA.Giraffe · July 2014

futuremrsog15 said:
For lingerie showers like this, I typically give this book:

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0965327523/ref=oh_details_o02_s00_i00?ie=UTF8&psc=1

So far all the brides have loved it!

I like that idea too! To be honest, I have a hard time shopping and giving gifts to people I'm close with, so I'm way apprehensive about what I bring to the shower for someone I barely know.

CA.Giraffe · July 2014

Everyone knows it's a PPD. I don't know the reason why they chose to marry sooner and have the PPD later - it's not health insurance or a job/moving situation or health or money issue - but they've always been honest, posted photos on FB on their actual wedding day, etc. DH is the "best man" for this event, and I know he would be there to support his friend no matter what, so I'm looking at it as a well-hosted party. I'd be less happy to participate if they had kept it secret, but as long as everyone knows what the score is, I'm happy to celebrate what amounts to their one-year anniversary.

theartistformerlyknownas · July 2014

I always give massage oils when I'm invited to that kind of crap thing. They can be as tame or as kinky as you want them to be. (Kama Sutra brand is my personal favorite.)

For a friend's "honeymoon shower" a few weeks ago, I got some bath things off the registry (towels and rugs) plus some bath bombs and massage oils. The bath bombs had some plastic cards that came out when the bomb dissolved with kinky ideas to do in the bath.

tigersgirlgv · July 2014

I got a silky robe embroidered with "Mrs. XYZ" for a friend's bachelorette party. It was well-received and might be a good option for someone you don't know well. It got in on etsy, there are a bunch of places that sell them.

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