I don't care what you wear Dad!

Alikat9614 · July 2014

My mom is driving me nuts. We chatted tonight, and she insists my dad (they've been divorced almost 20 years, and my dad has been remarried for most of those years) wear the same steel grey suit that my FI and his GM are renting. First, NOPE. Second, it isn't her call to make on her ex's wardrobe at my wedding. Third, I don't care what he wears! He is a grown man who can figure out what to wear. Plus, I honestly don't care, so long as he is there. Her reasoning is "how will it look in pictures" and I responded-- they'll look great! Ugh, I love my mom, but ugh. Advice? Anecdotes? Anyone else? **vent over**

theartistformerlyknownas · July 2014

Ugh. He'll look like every other guest who doesn't match anyone. And everyone else on earth. Like a normal person.

Hang in there!

JCbride2015 · July 2014

Ugh indeed. Just tell your mom no.

We are 10 months out and already FMIL and both of my grandmas have asked me what the other moms/grandmas are wearing so they can coordinate. I don't care, ladies! You will all look beautiful! Now stop asking me!

Lowell14 · July 2014

My dad doesn't know what to wear. I told him a dark suit. Then he asked specifics so I said black or charcoal. THEN he starts asking about pin strips...if you wants pin strips, get them...

My mom used to buy his suits but they have been divorced for 10 years and he hasn't needed a suit since 1997 so he's a bit lost...

I just told him to choose something that he liked. Then he asked about the tie to buy...

sarahufl · July 2014

FMIL has asked me approximately 1000 times if her dress is appropriate. I should add that she has never actually SHOWN it to me, just described it using vague terms like "flowy" and "fabricy". She is incredibly self-concious that her dress is long and my mother's is not.

I keep telling her she should wear what she wants and what makes her comfortable and that if I don't care, I can't imagine anyone else caring.

It is kind of annoying.

mrsmorales2be · July 2014

I couldn't care less what anyone wears, including my MOH - only attendant I'm having. I told her if she already has something she loves, wear it. What my mom, FMIL, stepmom, and my DAD choose to wear is so not even on my radar. My stepmom cares so much more about all of this nonsense than I do. It's just not a big deal to me. My mom said she's wearing navy - awesome. Do I care about the specifics? Not at all. All I need to know is she's there.

wandajune6 · July 2014

My sister went a bit bridezilla about what my dad wore to her wedding. I told my dad that I don't care in the slightest.

FI and the groomsmen are renting tuxes because FI loves tuxes. My dad hates the idea of wearing one so I told him to wear what he wants. He keeps joke/threatening to wear jorts and a Hawaiian shirt. I've told him and my mom that I'm ok with that.

He's now floundering between tuxes and suits (he has a bunch). I'll get him a tie that matches the WP and he'll get a 'bout like the other guys. He'll look great.

ShallowSeas · July 2014

My dad asked me what he should wear and I told him whatever he felt like wearing. I mentioned that the groomsman will be wearing gray slacks, but he could wear whatever color he wanted to, jacket or no jacket, he could even wear his Vans shoes if he wanted.

OliveOilsMom · July 2014

I gave my dad free reign also. He asked me what to wear and I said one of his suits is fine with me. But he wanted to rent a tux, since in his words "He had a job to do in this wedding and wanted to look nice" (my brothers had married first!). So I told him where the guys were getting their tuxes at. When we ordered H's tux, I specifically told them, my dad has free reign on what to order.

Also, my friend was just married on Saturday. The G, FOG and GMs all wore grey tuxes, FOB had on a black tux and it was not weird at all! All the guys looked great!

LadyMillil · July 2014

My parents kept asking me what they should wear, and I know both my grandmas asked my mom what they should wear. I told my mom the wedding colours, that the bridesmaids were wearing purple dresses and DH and the GMs were wearing black suits with ties in the wedding colours. I emphasized that this was to give her an idea of what I was planning attire and colour wise, and that they could wear what they wanted. My mom ended up falling in love with a dress that came in two colours (purple and blue) and she picked the blue one because she didn't want to be matchy-matchy with the BMs.

I think my parents were worried about wearing the "wrong" thing, so having some info on the BP attire made them more comfortable and confident in their decisions when picking their attire.

JennyColada · July 2014

I had a conversation with my mom about her attire the other day and told her "I don't care if you wear jeans so long as you're there!"

hikebikebemerry · July 2014

I hear you.

My Dad's wife was e-mailing me about if my Dad needed a suit or tux (before we had secured our venue). It took a while to convince her that I really didn't care and I have plenty of faith that he knew how to dress himself.

She also started bombarding me with links to dresses before I convinced her that I really didn't care what color/style/ etc. she wore. She was happy that she was allowed to wear black.

My Mom is going to be a freaking handful. My sister got married in Sept 2012, and my Mom still complains that my sister "forced" her to buy a dress that she didn't like. (My sister did no such thing, my Mom liked the dress up until the day of the wedding, and then she decided that it was too short.) So I am pretty much dreading shopping with my Mom- but I can't tell her just to go out and buy a dress because then she'll be upset at me for not spending this magical "mother-daughter bonding time" with her.

Thankfully my FMIL has been really easy going. About 5 months out, I gave her the number and hours for the dress place she really liked. She set up her own appointment and texted me that she found a dress that she really liked when she was done. Sweet.

Alikat9614 · July 2014

Thanks, everyone. Glad I'm not alone! Mom lives about 6 hours away and hasn't been around for any planning (except dress shopping), so I think she feels left out sometimes... Then again, I do tend to go with "better to ask for forgiveness later than approval now" approach

Yes, mom, we picked flowers. Yes, mom, we have a cake topper. Yes, mom, I've already taken care of the invites... And favors... And headpieces and accessories and shoes and etc.

falsara · July 2014

Oh yea, we have so long till my wedding and everyone is already asking. I told everyone, I don't care as long as you like what you choose to wear. When my Dad heard this he was all "Cool, I'll just wear my Marine Dress blue uniform." That makes me absolutely thrilled. It will look amazing and he's wants to wear it go Dad. In all honesty though he's my dad, i'm just glad he'll be able to be there.

SBmini · July 2014

When my dad asked what to wear, I told him anything BUT what the wedding party was wearing! I didn't want him to look like a groomsmen, I wanted him to look like a dad.

beachyone15 · July 2014

^^^ I agree with this!

BlackLace2015 · July 2014

I have faith in my Dad despite the fact that he is extremely "eccentric" and on a normal day is known to wear a crocadile Dundee type hat, duster jacket, and jungle boots lol. He owns at least one suit and I'm sure he'll be wearing it. With his jungle boots.

Alikat9614 · July 2014

SBmini said:

When my dad asked what to wear, I told him anything BUT what the wedding party was wearing! I didn't want him to look like a groomsmen, I wanted him to look like a dad.

That's what I was trying to get my mom to understand! Oy.

I don't care what you wear Dad!

Re: I don't care what you wear Dad!

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