Wedding Etiquette Forum

Rehearsal Dinner Invite

My husband showed me a blanket rehearsal dinner invite (email), and in it, it said because of space (or money issues) we ask that no spouses or significant others of the bridal party come. I was so shocked by this. What IS the correct etiquette on this. I know I was offended, and I'm not even going. Should I say something to her?

Re: Rehearsal Dinner Invite

  • no one needs to get invited to a rehearsal dinner except those involved in the wedding...and their SOs.
    SO's should ALWAYS be invited.

    I'm not sure who made this invite but here's some suggestions:
    If cost is an issue, have pizza or pasta.  
    If space is an issue find a different venue 
  • anm2n said:
    My husband showed me a blanket rehearsal dinner invite (email), and in it, it said because of space (or money issues) we ask that no spouses or significant others of the bridal party come. I was so shocked by this. What IS the correct etiquette on this. I know I was offended, and I'm not even going. Should I say something to her?
    Ugh - that's pretty bad.

    The correct etiquette is to invite people with their SOs. Unless she asks your opinion/why you aren't coming or you have the type of relationship with her where you feel you could say something, don't. 
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  • That is not ok.
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • I'd decline, if I were your husband. If asked, I'd tell why. Unless I were the best man, I'd decline the rehearsal, too. So sorry, got plans.
  • anm2nanm2n member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    I can't go to the wedding, and it's out of town, and I have to work but my husband is the best man...I'm just trying to help my FSIL out and not alienate people..
  • I'm confused, how is it a blanket invite if not everyone is invited?  A blanket invite, to me, means everyone is welcome.

    Also, you said don't want to alienate your FSIL, but how do you want to "help"? Do you just want to tell her, "hey, it's rude not to invite SOs, you should really think about doing something different"?  Or what?
  • Major etiquette fail.
  • Oh, I never thought of emailing a specific group of people a "blanket," I think of chain letters sent to someone's entire contact list "blanket."  But whatevs, that isn't the issue here.

    I think FSIL was scared of having those one-on-one convos about SOs not being invited, probably because she knows it's rude.  They should have asked the bridal party if they were coming and if their SOs were coming before making plans, but they're past that point now.  
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