Hey everyone, I have a question about bridal party gifts.
I was thinking of doing hand painted jewelry boxes with a necklace from Etsy inside, put them in a personalized mini-tote, and add travel sized toiletries. My bridesmaids all have to travel because I moved right after I graduated from college and my sister doesn't live near me. I texted my mom to ask her opinion but she didn't say anything for a while and then started asking me about manicures.
My mom and my sister have a long history of talking about me behind my back, for lack of a better term. I've see e-mails since my mom is not so stealth about showing me things on her iPad (she'll be showing me something in one e-mail, move on to her next e-mail, and it's a conversation about me with my sister), and I've even been the recipient of text messages about me that were actually intended for my sister. It sucks, but that's life. So I'm thinking that when she didn't text me for a while, she was running everything by my sister, who is very materialistic and money driven, and I'm not sure she would appreciate a gift like the ones I am giving, however I feel that nothing I can afford will meet her standards.
I'm paying for my bridesmaids to have their hair and makeup done, I feel like they should be pampered a little since they're traveling for me. My mom thinks that should be their gift/part of their gift, but having something done for the wedding is not considered a gift. She thinks that since I'm not paying for hair and makeup for my sister (she's getting an up-do and full makeup, while my bridesmaids are getting a blow-out, style, and not full makeup, just partial I guess), that I need to consider that with gifts.
I'm a fairly drama free bride. I kind of just go with the flow, trust the advice from my vendors, and don't ask for much. Sometimes I feel like my mom has made the process more dramatic than it needs to be. I'd ask for the budget for a specific vendor so I can see what my price point should be in searches, and she refuses to give me a number, just says to let her know what I find and she'll let me know if that's ok. As you can imagine, that has lead to several arguments and stressful situations that could have easily been avoided had I just been told what the budget was.
I guess I'm just asking if you all think the gifts I'm getting for my bridesmaids are ok, and what I should do about my sister's gift. I'm a new grad RN that just moved across the country, so I don't have a ton of money to spend. I just wanted to do something nice and heartfelt, but the impression I'm getting from my mom is "go cheap on your bridesmaids since you're doing their hair and makeup but break the bank for your sister since I'm paying for her hair and makeup."