A little background on the situation...
SO...I have my MOH & 2 BM's....as of now...
I have absolutely no probs w. my MOH except she lives in FL, but she's awesome and helping me in anyways she can & we're gonna work out the dress shopping somehow, shes my best friend, we're practically twins.
My issue is with one of my BM's,..that is my cousin! A couple of weeks ago (the first w/end of the year) I went to pick out my dress. So I was trying to see who would go with me because on the first dress shopping trip I had my mom, FMIL & my other BM-Carla-. So on this trip, my FMIL couldn't go, she was expecting company to arrive that day & Carla couldn't go because she had to get her son back from his dad (it was a Sunday). So I asked my cousin to go (as a cousin, but also as a BM) & she said yes... asked her on Friday...& the next day she and her boyfriend came over to eat & she was asking me where we were going..so I told her. It was going to be about a 30 min -maybe longer- drive...then she proceeded to comment "oh I didn't know we had to go that far, if I would have known that I would have said no", which isn't really surprising to me to hear her say. Then Sunday comes and I get a text..."I really don't want to go all the way down there just to watch you try on dresses" (or something to that effect) & so I texted back asking if she was going to back out of EVERY wedding related thing just because she doesn't feel like it, what about when we go to look at BM dresses?...to which she answered "well that will be different I'll HAVE to go them"...
Cut to now..& we haven't talked much because I have a habit of holding grudges, but this is a little different...It gets under my skin SO bad! I mean BM's are there to help & support, RIGHT?! So when a BM blows you off it kind of hurts, & it's worse when it's FAMILY.
What gets me is that she complains about how her dad is selfish & only cares about his (EX)wife & her kids, blah, blah blah ..-we had a rough yr last yr with him- & I was thinking about all of that a couple of weeks ago & thinking about him & the way he's acting towards our family..& thinking about her & the way she acts..ALL the time basically...& it dawned on me,...She's JUST like her dad. Super self centered, selfish. She doesn't really do anything for or with anyone unless it's beneficial to her.
SO she finally confronted me on FB a few minutes ago...apologizing...
BM:: "ok so i'm tired of this not talking thing! or these one word answers, i apologize for not going with you that day. no it didn't have anything to do with (boyfriend) so don't even mention his name it was all my doing on changing my mind and canceling going with you, i didn't realize it was something that important to you for me to go, if i would have know it was that serious i wouldn't have canceled but now i need to no if im still i bridesmaid or not before i decide to start saving money"
ME:: i know it had nothing to do with (boyfriend). it was all you being selfish. If i didn't want you to go I would not have invited you. DON'T YOU THINK?
BM:: well i kinda figured that, but i didn't realize it was that important and i didn't know you were actually gonna pick a dress that day i thought you were going to look.
I didn't answer her back. I'm trying to not lose it with her! I'm still upset about it to the point where I seriously want to lay into her about being so selfish and uncaring.
Should I still have her as a BM, knowing how unreliable/selfish she is. I mean, I picture scenes from Bridezilla where the bride is just going off on their BM's that are family...& I see that being us. Haha. Do I take that chance or what?! I mean I DO want to cause she's my closest cousin and all. But idk...I'm super confused & needed to vent/rant & get some opinions?
Has anyone else has this issue?
Any opinions?
SORRY SO LONG!!