Help! I am strongly against the "B list" for many reasons! We have been engaged since November 2013 (wedding is October 11, 2014) and asked our families to give us their lists prior to sending out save the dates. My parents (note: they are hosting and paying for most everything) provided a list within a week of us asking, so did FI father and stepmother. It felt like pulling teeth trying to get a final list from FI mother and step father, pretty much a week before STD went out. I stated more than once that once the STD were out, that the list was set, no adding since there was no subtracting anyone. We are maxed ou as far as invited guests and reception location maximum. We chose a location that was very budget friendly, but still nice, so we could invite more friends since both our families are large.
Here's the dilemma... FMIL mentioned to me yesterday that X and Y can't make it. Then right away said something along the lines of, "I'll have to think of who to add in their place. But we'll do that later." (FI little brother, son of FMIL, is getting married this weekend, so we've all been busy!) I didn't say anything as she became side tracked and we started talking about something for this weekend. Should I be a little upset/annoyed that she thinks we need to add someone else in their place, after the list has already been decided and save the dates out? I've never heard of needing to do such a thing, and I don't think it's right at all. I don't want any sort of B list because they are extremely rude and tacky. My parents are upset that she thinks she can just add people after the fact like this and told me that she needs to talk to them about any additions. They are doing that so I don't have to worry about any issues that may come up.
Any thoughts??