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Was hoping for a miracle...

I know a few weeks back I posted about my aunt finding out her cancer had spread, and the doctors gave her 3 months to 1 year.  Well yesterday she passed away.   She was 45.  I guess they didn't realize it had spread to her brain so she went a lot quicker than expected.  When I saw her on Saturday, I just kept praying for some last minute miracle, and a part of me believed it could happen. 

So now she's gone.  I feel like cancer changes someone, it takes away the core of who they are.  When I saw her on Saturday, she didn't look like herself, she wasn't acting like herself (of course she was asleep the whole time but you know).  So it's hard for me to believe that she's actually gone, when it feels like I was looking at a completely different person this weekend.  She was so full of life, and she was probably one of my favorite relatives.  I know she was my FI's favorite person in my family, even though he didn't know her too well.

Anyways, I'm not sure what the point of this post is.  I guess I just had to get out my thoughts.
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Re: Was hoping for a miracle...

  • Hummingbird125Hummingbird125 New York
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    I'm so, so sorry. That is such a terribly young age, I can't even imagine how painful it must be for your family. 
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  • Hold on to who she was before this last weekend. Memories are more precious than anything, and we can definitely pick which ones to focus on.

    I'm so sorry about your aunt. 45 is much much too young.

  • I am so sorry for your loss *hugs*
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  • ShallowSeasShallowSeas Indianapolis, IN
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    I am so sorry :(  Cancer is seriously the worst. My grandpa just found out that his cancer has metastasized from prostate to his bones and isn't doing well.  He has declined a lot in the past month and definitely isn't himself anymore.

    I'm sorry sorry that you and your family are going through this. You are in my thoughts.
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  • justbeingme93justbeingme93
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    edited July 2014
    I am so sorry to hear about your aunt. Experiencing a loss is never easy, but it especially difficult when you know it wasn't their time. I'm not the best with comforting words, but this is a quote I found comfort in...

    "Goodbyes are only for those who love with their eyes. Because for those who love with heart and soul, there is no separation."

    Peaseblossom55
  • Dignity100Dignity100 Northeastern Ohio
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    So sorry for your loss.


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  • I'm so sorry for your loss.

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  • KeptInStitchesKeptInStitches the Northern Plains
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    I'm so sorry for your loss. You and your family are in my thoughts.
  • lmcooper86lmcooper86 Toronto
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    I am so sorry for your loss. My thoughts and prayers go out to you and your family

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  • So sorry for your loss. :( Cancer sucks. You and your family are in my thoughts.
  • I am so sorry for your loss

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  • I'm so sorry for your loss! Lots of T&P coming your way.

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  • AuroraRose41AuroraRose41 New York
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    I am so sorry for your loss. Cancer is a terrible thing, and it's never easy, but at least she isn't suffering anymore, and is in a better place. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. 

  • I'm so sorry.  Cancer is terrible.  Your family is in my thoughts and prayers.
  • bethsmilesbethsmiles Denver, CO
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    edited July 2014
    I'm so sorry! *hugs* Cancer is sucks. Don't focus on those last memories of her when she wasn't herself. Focus on the woman she was before then. Cancer took her from you but don't let it take away your memories of who she really was.


  • I'm so sorry for your loss! I have also lost a family member to cancer, so I understand how it can impact a person and a family. Although the pain never goes away, try to remember the happy moments with your aunt, and don't be afraid to talk about her with others who loved her. 
  • Ollie08Ollie08 Central FL
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    I'm so sorry for your loss. 

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  • Hugs.  Cancer sucks. 
    I guess, to tell you the truth, I've never had much of a desire to grow facial hair. I think I've managed to play quarterback just fine without a mustache. - Peyton
  • So sorry to hear about your loss!! Yes Cancer does suck. I've had friends beat it (amazing) and sadly had a family member and friend both lose their battle. You and your family are in my thoughts.
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  • I am so sorry for your loss. Cancer sucks. It just fucking sucks...



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  • lovemyrunnerlovemyrunner Nebraska
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    So sorry for your loss.  As someone who lost a parent to cancer when I was a kid, and as an oncology nurse, I can verify that cancer only attacks the best people, and always way too young.  PPs are right, hold onto your good memories of your aunt, and let the memories of her illness fade away over time.
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  • eilis1228eilis1228 Southwest
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    Oh no, I'm so sorry for your loss. Cancer is truly terrible. *hugs*


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  • behsco90behsco90 Oregon
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    Thank you everyone for your kind words.  It's just so hard to believe she's gone.  Cancer is a fucking bitch and has taken too many of my family members before their time.  Another one of my aunts passed away, in her 60s, back in September, before her time.  My grandma passed away a few years ago from cancer.  While she wasn't young (in her late 80s) she would have lived well into her 100s if she didn't get cancer.

    @lovemyrunner - this is a pattern I have been noticing lately.  I'm trying to keep positive, but to me it seems like a punishment for being so full of life and a great person.
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