Invitation wording - is this accurate?

Re: Invitation wording - is this accurate?

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  Maggie0829 member

  

  July 2014

  ElcaB said:

  Here is our invitation wording. If you don't mind having a read & letting me know if it's written properly, I'd greatly appreciate it!

  
  

  (Invitation)
  Together with their families
  ElcaB and FI
  Request the pleasure of your company at their marriage
  Date Time
  VenueVenue Address Line 1Venue Address Line 2
  Reception to follow
  

  
  

  (Response Card)

  We hope you can join us! Kindly respond by Date.
  M_______________________________________
  ⇯ Yes! We wouldn't miss it for the world.    Number attending: ____⇯ No, we are unable to attend but will be celebrating in spirit!
  I promise to hit the dance floor if I hear _____________________(song) by __________________(artist).
  

  
  

  (We're also planning to include a business card-size enclosure with our wedding website.)

  
  

  So, how did we do? Did we leave anything out? Screw up? Are they perfect?

  
  

  ETF: Spacing.

  I made some changes to the invitation.  I changed the "dinner, dancing..." portion only because "reception to follow" is the appropriate wording, but personally I don't mind what you had.

  
  

  I changed the other wording so that those invited know that they are attending a marriage ceremony and not just a wedding celebration.

  
  

  For the RSVP I eliminated the first part because that is just kind of assumed by your invited guests. I mean why else would you be sending them an invite if you didn't want them to join you?

  
  

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  ElcaB member

  

  July 2014 edited July 2014

  Eek! When I was deleting our real names I must have deleted the "Invite you to celebrate their marriage" part. 

  
  

  Thanks for the suggestions, @Maggie0829! We'll probably keep the "Dinner, dancing, & merriment to follow." Our wedding isn't very formal or traditional, but I like your other changes. 

  
  

  ETF: The signals from my brain to my fingers aren't functioning properly today.

  

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  Maggie0829 member

  

  July 2014

  Welcome! I agree with you about the dinner, dancing and merriment part. I like it and am personally a fan when it is kind of spelled out what I am to expect at the reception.

  
  

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  CMGragain member

  

  July 2014 edited July 2014

  OK.  Here is the semi-traditional wording:
  
  

  (Invitation)
  Together with their families
  Bride's Full Name
  and
  Groom's Full Name
  request the pleasure of your company
  as they are united in marriage
  Day, date
  time o'clock
  VenueVenue
  Address Line

  City, State
  
  Reception to follow
  
  

  (Response Card)

  Please reply by Date.
  M_______________________________________
  
  accept. Number attending: ____
  
  send regrets.
  
  Dance request (song) by __________________(artist).
  

  
  
  I am sorry, but it is not proper to describe "dinner, merriment and dancing".  It sounds like bragging.
  
  

  

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  southernbelle0915 mod

  

  July 2014 edited July 2014

  ElcaB said:

  Here is our invitation wording. If you don't mind having a read & letting me know if it's written properly, I'd greatly appreciate it!

  
  

  (Invitation)
  Together with their families
  ElcaB 
  & and
  FI
  Invite you to celebrate their wedding (this is informal but not incorrect - "request the pleasure of your company at their wedding" is more formal for a non-religious venue)
  Date (e.g. - Saturday, the first of November)
  Time (e.g. - half after four o'clock)
  Venue
  Venue Address Line 1
  Venue Address Line 2
  
  Dinner, dancing, and merriment to follow. (this doesn't bother me personally, but it is definitely an indication that the wedding is informal)
  

  
  

  (Response Card)

  We hope you can join us! (also informal) Please reply by Date.
  M_______________________________________
  ⇯ Yes! We wouldn't miss it for the world.    Number attending: ____⇯ No, we are unable to attend but will be celebrating in spirit!
  I promise to hit the dance floor if I hear _____________________(song) by __________________(artist).
  

  
  

  (We're also planning to include a business card-size enclosure with our wedding website.)

  
  

  So, how did we do? Did we leave anything out? Screw up? Are they perfect?

  
  

  ETF: Spacing.

  Overall, I think it's great. Very excited for you that you're to this point now! I made a few suggestions. Overall, the wording choices indicate that the wedding is not at all formal, so just something to consider depending on the feel you want for your event.

  
  

  ETF: paragraphs - wth TK!

  *********************************************************************************

  
  

  

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  ElcaB member

  

  July 2014

  Thanks, @southernbelle0915! We're definitely not having a fancy schmancy wedding, so I think it works. 

  

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