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do I ask her to be a bridesmaid?

sames52915sames52915 member
100 Comments Second Anniversary 25 Love Its Name Dropper
in Wedding Party
I had my bridal party all picked out, MOH and 4BM, 4 of my close friends and my future sister in law. My mother and now my fiance are both questioning whether I should also include his sister in law. His brother, brother in law & sister will all be in the wedding party -is it wrong to not include his sister in law too? Or is it weird to ask her?
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Re: do I ask her to be a bridesmaid?

  • MobKazMobKaz member
    Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Neither your FI or your mother should be dictating who you ask.  If his SIL is important, FI can ask her to stand on HIS side.


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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] member
    250 Love Its 100 Comments Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    If SIL is someone your FI feels should be in the WP then she can stand on his side. 
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  • OliveOilsMomOliveOilsMom member
    Tenth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    edited July 2014
    sames52915 said:
    I had my bridal party all picked out, MOH and 4BM, 4 of my close friends and my future sister in law. My mother and now my fiance are both questioning whether I should also include his sister in law. His brother, brother in law & sister will all be in the wedding party -is it wrong to not include his sister in law too? Or is it weird to ask her?
    Pick her only if you feel close to her. Otherwise, she can stand on FI's side, if it's that important.
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  • atlastmrsgatlastmrsg member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    If you're not close to her, don't let them pressure you into it.  It'll be awkward for both of you.
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  • KellyT22KellyT22 member
    Fifth Anniversary 10 Comments Name Dropper 5 Love Its
    I'm going through a similar situation. FI's brother and all four nieces and nephews are in the wedding. Right now if feels natural to invite his sister in law and keep it in the family. BUT you have to decide if she is someone you want involved so heavily in the wedding.
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  • Lauderdale PinkLauderdale Pink member
    250 Love Its 500 Comments Second Anniversary First Answer
    I don't see what could be hurt by including this lady, but I do see how she can be hurt by being the only one left out.  Does one more lady really matter that much?
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  • AddieCakeAddieCake member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    Lauderdale Pink said:
    I don't see what could be hurt by including this lady, but I do see how she can be hurt by being the only one left out.  Does one more lady really matter that much?

    If I was not close with someone and she asked me to be a bridesmaid when everyone else was included, I would know it was just an "obligatory, don't-want-you-to-feel-left-out" invitation, which would make me feel more uncomfortable than if I just had not been asked at all.
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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