Bridesmaids Gifts

cmackenzie8782 · July 2014

Hi everyone! I'm just wondering how much everyone is spending on each bridesmaid? Everything seems so expensive and it's adding up quickly. Did you get each tote bag to put the gifts in? I was thinking of a tote bag, some piece of jewelry, monogrammed robe and maybe a purse hanger. Any great sites that I can buy the robes from besides Etsy?

artbyallie · July 2014

We bought each of our wedding party members a book we thought they would enjoy and/or get use out of (the books included a cookbook, knitting patterns, and an exercise book). Inexpensive and they loved them.

chibiyui · July 2014

I spent about 75 dollars on each bridesmaid. You do not have to spend a lot, but you should get them something individual that they'd like. (One of my BM's got a cookbook, another got a scarf and gift card to go shopping, etc)

MyNameIsNot · July 2014

I spent about 50-75 on each person.

I didn't buy any matching tote bags or other non-gift wedding items to go along with the actual gifts.

slothiegal · July 2014

I'm coming in at around 60-70 bucks for each of them. No tote bags, just personal gifts for each one.

cmackenzie8782 · July 2014

Everything would be personal and I guess the trend where I live is a tote bag to put the gift in. I've been in 3 of my friends weddings and each one has given everyone a bag with the gifts in there. I was even thinking maybe a cute beach bag, we all live on the water so a beach bag would be great for all. As for the price, I was thinking along the same lines as everyone else so thats a good sign :-)

LondonLisa · July 2014

cmackenzie8782 said:

Everything would be personal and I guess the trend where I live is a tote bag to put the gift in. I've been in 3 of my friends weddings and each one has given everyone a bag with the gifts in there. I was even thinking maybe a cute beach bag, we all live on the water so a beach bag would be great for all. As for the price, I was thinking along the same lines as everyone else so thats a good sign :-)

Yes, but then think about it this way: each wedding you have been in has given you a tote bag therefore how many unused tote/ beach bags do you have hanging around your house? Just skip the "bag" and spend that money on the actual gift.

cmackenzie8782 · July 2014

LondonLisa said:

cmackenzie8782 said:

Everything would be personal and I guess the trend where I live is a tote bag to put the gift in. I've been in 3 of my friends weddings and each one has given everyone a bag with the gifts in there. I was even thinking maybe a cute beach bag, we all live on the water so a beach bag would be great for all. As for the price, I was thinking along the same lines as everyone else so thats a good sign :-)

Yes, but then think about it this way: each wedding you have been in has given you a tote bag therefore how many unused tote/ beach bags do you have hanging around your house? Just skip the "bag" and spend that money on the actual gift.

haha that is true, we are all teachers so we love our school bags! But yes, you are right, how many bags can I have in my closet!

cantwaitforthefuture · July 2014

I also spent about 75 dollars per bridesmaid, and a little more on my sister (MOH) but I got them all different gifts. I bought a nice silk/cashmere Betsy Johnson Pashmina for my friend that LOVES scarves. My cousin is a huge Pittsburgh Pirates fan, and I got her personalizes Pittsburgh Pirates button down shirt (like the players wear on the field). My sister loves owls, so I got her a super cute owl necklace. She also always borrows/says she lovves this one purse of mine, so I got her a similar purse.

BMoreBride6 · July 2014

cmackenzie8782 said:

Everything would be personal and I guess the trend where I live is a tote bag to put the gift in. I've been in 3 of my friends weddings and each one has given everyone a bag with the gifts in there. I was even thinking maybe a cute beach bag, we all live on the water so a beach bag would be great for all. As for the price, I was thinking along the same lines as everyone else so thats a good sign :-)

Just because it is the norm, doesn't make it useful. I'm a teacher...I also have reusable tote bags out my ears (although I am also blame my Athelta/lululemon addiction for that one). Things don't have to match. They don't have to scream "bridal party" just get them things they will actually want and use.

tammym1001 · July 2014

I spent about $200 on each girl's gift. I did put them in tote bags. We all love tote bags though. We are those girls that line up at VS to spend $65 on stuff we don't need to get free tote bags. LOL They all use their bags on a regular basis so it wasn't a waste of money for me. I did it because I knew they would like them though, not because it's just what is given.

atlastmrsg · July 2014

I would not want the tote bag, robe, or purse hanger.

Quite frankly, I'd rather just have my dress bought for me at this point and I'd be happy. I wouldn't need anything else. If you wanted to throw in a bottle of champagne, I'd be delighted.

Every time I go to Goodwill, I feel like I'm putting the things I donate in a tote bag and just leaving the whole thing. Or if I loan someone something, take a dish to a party, I put it in a tote or reusable shopping bag and leave it to get rid of it without feeling guilty about throwing it away. I have four robes now. I'm not going to use a purse hanger. If a bar has a hook below, I use it. Otherwise, floor or chair.

The general consensus here is that all monogrammed or bridesmaid-y stuff is a huge waste of money. People want things they can eat, drink, to be pampered, or simply to be appreciated. In fact, I'd take a heartfelt note over anything monogrammed, bedazzled, or a tote bag seven out of seven days a week (and twice on Sunday).

thisismynickname2 · July 2014

I just got my bridesmaid gifts. I spent $100 on each, but, we're not having a rehearsal/dinner so I felt I was able to spend more. I hit a Kate Spade sale.... aw yeah.

As a point of interest, we're in our 30's. When I was a bridesmaid in years past, much less money was spent on gifts. I wouldn't feel right spending $20 on chintzy jewelry or chintzy anything now that we're in our 30's and all well-employed. These three women are my nearest and dearest and I can't wait to gift them with designer handbags. This is above and beyond what I buy my sister for Christmas/birthday and my friends and I normally don't do any gifts besides wine. Special occasion here!

mellyD2014 · July 2014

@thisismynickname YES on the Kate Spade sale

I have 6 bridesmaids and was able to get them each an awesome Kate Spade bag for like $30 bucks a pop (instead of the usual $90). Plus they're pretty basic clutches in different neutrals that I know they'll each love, so I was pretty pumped about catching that flash sale!

I'm also planning to spend $60 per person - bags, a bottle of wine each, and a gift card to one of their favorite stores. Now, I might go get a throw-away $2 tote bag from Old Navy to put all this into, but fortunately for me I know none of my friends feel they can have too many bags.

Jen4948 · July 2014

You don't have to spend a lot of money on bridesmaids' gifts, but honestly, I'd buck the trend and not give your suggested items as gifts, especially if they're monogrammed. I would have no use for monogrammed items, plus I wouldn't be comfortable receiving a robe as a gift. It's just too personal and intimate an item.

lodele47 · July 2014

Ultimately you know your girls better than any of us.. so think about what people have suggested and think about what your girls would really appreciate. I'm sure you'll come up with something great

Alikat9614 · July 2014

@thisismynickname‌ and @mellyD2014‌ --- yes, kate spade sale! I got my BMs both great bags for $29/each. What a steal!!! Filled them with some useful wedding goodies (sf red bull, kind bar, mints, tide pen, travel size vodka, tissues) and then got them each something else personal-- sephora lipstick for my MOH in a shade she always borrows from me, and a Starbucks gift card for my other BM. I think it totaled around $60 for each of them. I plan on wrapping them in a cheapie gift bag from the Dollar Tree.

AddieCake · July 2014

A good quality robe alone would be pricey. So if you are planning on multiple things, that tells me the monogrammed robe is going to be flimsy like one I got this past Christmas as part of a bath gift set. It was useless and promptly went in the trash. Somewhere in a box around here I think I have a purse hanger someone gave me a couple years ago....

jacques27 · July 2014

Unless you know they would love every single item, I'd pass on what you have lined up. And remember, no one is going to tell you to your face they are less than thrilled with your gift, so don't go off of past experience of giving those same types of things in the past unless you've seen them repeatedly use those gifts over and over. I just wrote a thank you card for some earrings telling them how much I appreciate their thoughtfulness - those earrings are never touching my earlobes.

I would much rather receive a much higher quality gift based on my individual likes and interests and given to me because you saw this in a store somewhere and immediately thought of me and you wanted me to have it than a collection of lower quality stuff that fit your bridesmaid theme and are giving everyone - even if you do monogram it or pick out my favorite color. Identical gifts (even if somewhat personalized) just further enforces the concept of bridesmaid as prop instead of appreciating them as individuals. Plus, I personally am super picky about my robes (length, weight of fabric, tie vs. zip), ridiculously picky about my jewelry (I just attended a jewelry party where everyone ooh'ed and ahh'ed and I found only one thing in an 80 page catalog I only kinda liked), people keep giving me those purse hangers (I've just tossed 8 of them, never used), and while I would use the tote at some point if high enough quality, I have an entire closet filled with totes.

Is anyone into coffee or tea? Make them a gift basket with accessories and really high quality beans or tea. Does anyone knit or crochet? Buy them some hand-spun, hand-dyed unusual yarn and some nice bamboo needles. Does anyone like to cook or bake? Buy them a cookbook they've had their eye on, some good quality vanilla, spices from Penzey's, etc.

cmackenzie8782 · July 2014

Thanks for everyone for your ideas! I have some ideas running around in my mind now :-)

bucksgirl414 · July 2014

If I was a BM.... I would appreciate help with my dress or hair/nails for the wedding day or after if need be. A visa gift card would be nice too.

PandaNikki · July 2014

My budget is a little tight, but I had time and creativity, so I am making personalized wooden jewelry boxes for each of my girls. They are wooden boxes from the craft store that I finished and polyurethaned so they have a really nice smooth finish. They have glass heart cutouts in the top, and FI is going to etch their first initial in each of the hearts since he does glass etching as a hobby. Lastly, I have craft paper for each box that is personalized to each girl that I am going to line the boxes with.

I do have necklaces that I am going to put in the boxes that I got for them to wear on the wedding day. I guess they aren't technically part of the gift, but it just makes more sense for them to be together.

ETA: I can't spell.

holyguacamole79 · August 2014

Knottie13201989 said:
I got mine lockets that I filled with charms that tell a story. I put in there charms that represent our friendship ...very inexpensive. Here is the website if you want to check it out www.perfectlocket.origamiowl.com

Are you the Oragami Owl rep? If so, you need to sign up as a vendor.

southernbelle0915 · August 2014

@KnotPorscha‌

abbyj700 · August 2014

While FI has decided to go more of a traditional route and buy matching items for his groomsmens - it's because he found something they will all love (custom bourbon barrels - and they are all huge bourbon drinkers!). I am not electing to go this route as my BM's are all very different people. I've been in 3 weddings in the past year - each wedding got all of the ladies something matching - only 1 of them do I actually use - which was an infinity scarf and a boat bag - both of which I use constantly. Every other wedding...nope, never going to use any of it. And I feel bad, because I love these people - but honestly they obviously didn't put much thought into their gifts. Don't be that person.

One of our BM is a big bourbon drinker as well - so she's getting a bourbon barrel like the GM. One of our BM's loves to get her nails done but hates to spend money on herself - so I'm getting her a giftcard to our favorite nail salon. I've not made decisions for the final 2 - but know they will be something personal for each!

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