Invites to adults first cousins

leavealone · August 2014

Why in the world do people not think through their actions. It's a simple rule - treat your first cousins who are adults the same. 1.all adults get their own invites (no exceptions) 2. If you can afford it ALL cousins are treated the same and get a plus one. 3. If you can't afford to invite a plus one for all cousins than cut it by those who are engaged to married or live together, and ALL dating cousins do not get a plus one. Doing differently can be hurtful within a family. Why make a happy occasion that way. Follow the simple rule.

chibiyui · August 2014

Knottie40929943 said:

Why in the world do people not think through their actions. It's a simple rule - treat your first cousins who are adults the same. 1.all adults get their own invites (no exceptions) 2. If you can afford it ALL cousins are treated the same and get a plus one. 3. If you can't afford to invite a plus one for all cousins than cut it by those who are engaged to married or live together, and ALL dating cousins do not get a plus one. Doing differently can be hurtful within a family. Why make a happy occasion that way. Follow the simple rule.

Yeah. I purposefully didn't invite my cousins on one side of the family. They're assholes.

mileybangerz · August 2014

Who are you???

manateehugger · August 2014

mileybangerz said:

Who are you???

Miss Manners' deranged cousin?

mileybangerz · August 2014

PDKH said:

mileybangerz said:

Who are you???

Miss Manners' deranged cousin?

Apparently .....

theartistformerlyknownas · August 2014

Knottie40929943 said:

Why in the world do people not think through their actions. It's a simple rule - treat your first cousins who are adults guests the same with respect.

1.all adults get their own invites (no exceptions) Sure.
2. If you can afford it are close with them all, ALL cousins are treated the same and get a plus one.
3. If you can't afford to invite a plus one significant others for all cousins adults then cut it by those who are engaged to married or live together the entire couple, and ALL dating cousins adults do not get a plus one, they get their significant other invited specifically by name.

Doing differently can be is hurtful within a family to everyone. Why make a happy occasion that way. Follow the simple rule.

Fixed that for you.

NYCMercedes · August 2014

Break the simpleton rule.

bethsmiles · August 2014

My cousin decided to use the married, engaged, living together rule so she didn't invite my SO of 5 years to her wedding. I didn't attend. I'm not traveling across the country to celebrate your relationship when you won't recognize mine. Nothing pisses me off more than not inviting guests' significant others. No relationship is more valid than another relationship.

sophhabobopha · August 2014

bethsmiles said:

My cousin decided to use the married, engaged, living together rule so she didn't invite my SO of 5 years to her wedding. I didn't attend. I'm not traveling across the country to celebrate your relationship when you won't recognize mine. Nothing pisses me off more than not inviting guests' significant others. No relationship is more valid than another relationship.

BOOM.

AddieCake · August 2014

Ummmm, not exactly.

climbingsingle · August 2014

Uh. No, honey. Just no.

twitterbird · August 2014

I'm inviting cousins I'm close to (plus their significant others) end of story. Not inviting my cousin I see every few years at funerals who lives on the other side of the country just for the sake of inviting them. That's a recipe for B-listing which I'm so not doing.

tigersgirlgv · August 2014

Jus another reason not to use the "married, engaged, living together" rule. I had a friend get engaged (yay!) between when a mutual friend sent STDs and invites. Newly engaged friend still didn't get an invite for her now FI. She chose not to undertake the long trip without her FI and told mutual friend so (politely of course). I was like, "You go, girl!"

Blue_Bird · August 2014

???

bethsmiles · August 2014

Laurie Roche said:

I'm inviting cousins I'm close to (plus their significant others) end of story. Not inviting my cousin I see every few years at funerals who lives on the other side of the country just for the sake of inviting them. That's a recipe for B-listing which I'm so not doing.

I think this is perfectly acceptable. I was way more offended that my cousin invited me without my SO than I would've been if I hadn't been invited. We aren't close, weddings are expensive, I'm happy for you because you're family but don't feel obligated to invite me.

iloveotters2014 · August 2014

What exactly is the point of your thread? Other than to spew bad advice?

[Deleted User] · August 2014

I took the original post to mean, "I didn't get invited to my cousin's wedding, but my brother did. My advice to all brides is, if you're going to invite one cousin, please invite them all." But it was worded terribly.

theartistformerlyknownas · August 2014

adk19 said:

I took the original post to mean, "I didn't get invited to my cousin's wedding, but my brother did. My advice to all brides is, if you're going to invite one cousin, please invite them all." But it was worded terribly.

I took it as "my cousin and her boyfriend got invited and I didn't get invited at all. I totally should have gotten invited instead of her BF."

[Deleted User] · August 2014

lolo883 said:

adk19 said:

I took the original post to mean, "I didn't get invited to my cousin's wedding, but my brother did. My advice to all brides is, if you're going to invite one cousin, please invite them all." But it was worded terribly.

I took it as "my cousin and her boyfriend got invited and I didn't get invited at all. I totally should have gotten invited instead of her BF."

Sure, or that. Basically, "my feefees are hurt, so you should perform poor etiquette in order to make me feel better."

MyNameIsNot · August 2014

adk19 said:

I took the original post to mean, "I didn't get invited to my cousin's wedding, but my brother did. My advice to all brides is, if you're going to invite one cousin, please invite them all." But it was worded terribly.

But still, that's not etiquette. You may be jealous that your brother is closer to your cousin, but that doesn't mean the cousin had to invite you. (Proverbial "you").

It may often be the easiest practical choice to invite all cousins or none, but there's not etiquette rule that says that you must.

lc07 · August 2014

I took it as OP didn't get to invite a date (and is not actually in any kind of relationship) and another cousin who is "simply dating someone" got to bring them.

leavealone · August 2014

Wow! No need to be nasty and make up stories.

leavealone · August 2014

How petty that someone would feel the need to cut down the way I wrote my message. The person who judged me in such a harsh and rude way must feel the need to cut down others to make her/himself feel better. Your life must be pathetic.

theartistformerlyknownas · August 2014

Knottie40929943 said:

Wow! No need to be nasty and make up stories.

You left no choice when you posted and ran for 3 days. You're under a flawed assumption of wedding etiquette. Whatever the circumstances leading to your post, your advice about cousins and plus-ones is incorrect.

MNVegas · August 2014

Knottie40929943 said:

How petty that someone would feel the need to cut down the way I wrote my message. The person who judged me in such a harsh and rude way must feel the need to cut down others to make her/himself feel better. Your life must be pathetic.

Oh your forgot to say you feel sorry for our DH/FIs!

chibiyui · August 2014

Knottie40929943 said:
How petty that someone would feel the need to cut down the way I wrote my message. The person who judged me in such a harsh and rude way must feel the need to cut down others to make her/himself feel better. Your life must be pathetic.

Well, it was pretty incoherent and everyone took it differently. So, if you want to effectively communicate with people, you might want to take note.

AddieCake · August 2014

So you posted something confusing, came back to bitch about how people responded, but didn't clarify the points they were confused about? I certainly am glad I checked back in on this.

holyguacamole79 · August 2014

So what is the story behind your post, @Knottie40929943? It just seems a bit random and out of nowhere. It's also interesting that your profile has a similar rant.

jerkyanne · August 2014

sarahbear31 said:
So what is the story behind your post, @Knottie40929943? It just seems a bit random and out of nowhere. It's also interesting that your profile has a similar rant.

After reading the profile, I think it's actually "I just broke up with my bf so now I have no guest but my cousin gets to bring her bf and I have to watch them be cute while I'm alone"

Invites to adults first cousins

Re: Invites to adults first cousins

Choose Another Board

Search Boards