So our officiant asked me the question, "do you want your father to give you away?" I had to tell her that I really haven't decided. I haven't given I t much thought because it's upsetting, but now that I need to make a decision it's all I have been thinking about. So here is my back story:
Growing up Mmy dad worked long hours and was often away on business. He didn't do much raising and it almost all fell on my mother. He wasn't very affectionate and we never did daddy daughter type things. He wasn't there to see me off to prom, missed almost all of my competitive swimming events growing up (but would always ask for the men's wrestling schedule) I have always been closer to him than my younger sister and we have a lot of the same viewpoints. But in all honesty, our relationship is more like an uncle/neice. My parents relationship has always been rocky and I could have told you back when I was in middle schools that they would end up divorced.
So let's fast forward to December 2013. My FI proposed without asking my parents first. When I called to tell them the awesome news they announced that they were getting divorced....in the same phone conversation. Talk about a huge downer. It is now over a year and a half later and they are still not divorced and it is very ugly. He will not talk about the wedding, and has no interest in it. If it comes up he makes some comment on how marriage worked out so well for him and then changes the topic. I have since stopped all wedding talk unless it's absolutely nessissary.
About 3 months ago he and I got in a big fight because I refused to get involved with the divorce and essentially play middle man. In that phone conversation he mentioned that if the divorce to not over by the time of the wedding it will ruin the entire day for me and everyone. I then explained that if he can't behave himself and put his drama aside then please do not come out of respect for me and my FI, and that I have told my mother the same thing. He flew off the handle and told me that if that's the case he probably won't show up and I should find someone else to walk me down the aisle.
Since that fiasco we have since made up. I bit the bullet and reached out to him. What can I say, he's my father and I guess I'll just have to be the bigger person.
That brings me to now. Do I want someone who has been so unsupportive and negative to walk me down the aisle? But then again he's my father and I don't want to regret not having him giving me away. He's already missed out on a lot. I really have no daddy daughter memories.
Thanks ladies for reading. Sorry this is so long. Please excuse my typos I am on my tablet and I suck at typing.