Am I a horrible person?

AprilH81 · August 2014

I'm so bombarded by the "DONATE TO 'X' CAUSE"... Our CEO just sent out an email asking for donations to support a school in Haiti, we have been asked to donate frequent flier miles to Making a Wish, each office has a charity team that does events several times a year where it is encouraged (but not required at all) to participate. We raise money for employees going through a hard time (severe illness, death of a spouse, etc.)... The causes are worthy in my opinion, but PLEASE can I make up my own mind about when, what and how to donate? I come to work to earn a living, not turn around and give my paycheck to causes that are important to someone else (again, these are worthy causes/charities, not a GoFundMe). DH and I give but on our own terms to things that are important to US. I'm just over it.

Sugargirl1019 · August 2014

Ugh. That's super annoying of your work. Do they know if you donate or pass?

charlottesmom0626 · August 2014

My job is a nonprofit and they ask us to donate back to them. Um, I give 40+ hours a week to this place, I would rather donate financially to other causes.

AprilH81 · August 2014

@sugargirl1019 The only people who know are the people who collect the money. I just feel guilty because I don't donate to everything or don't donate much.

We are not a non-profit so I just get tired of all the fundraisers, donation requests and supply drives.

climbingsingle · August 2014

All of that would really piss me off. I donate but I choose who or what I donate my time and money to.

southernbelle0915 · August 2014

I don't think you're a horrible person at all.

People at my company do this and I find it really obnoxious. There's a woman who uses our department's personal contact info (so like my home address and husband's name - that's meant to be used for emergencies) to send requests for donations to the Leukemia Foundation, to sponsor her 5K runs, etc. I find it super inappropriate and borderline intrusive.

steph861 · August 2014

When I was working while in grad school, this used to piss me off to no end. Somebody actually got mad at me for not donating at one of our many work fundraisers - I curtly told her that I was a student and walked away. She didn't bother me again.

My work also has a 50/50 draw every week during a two-month charity drive each fall. One time somebody decided to give their winnings back to the charity benefiting from the draw, and now every subsequent winner feels obligated to give the money back as well. I've heard people complaining about it.

But yeah, the donor fatigue thing really gets me. I give to charity every month - it's not like I'm being selfish with my money. But when everybody's pushing you to donate, they're not doing their cause any good. They're turning people off charity in general.

morphemes · August 2014

Yep I used to work for a non-profit that REQUIRED employees to donate at least 10% of their paychecks to them! There were so many issues at that place that I don't know where to start, but when you were hired on, the donation form was pre-filled out and you had to sign or they wouldn't give you the job.

mysticl · August 2014

charlottesmom0626 said:

My job is a nonprofit and they ask us to donate back to them. Um, I give 40+ hours a week to this place, I would rather donate financially to other causes.

I've worked for a couple of non-profits. The one was a foster care agency. They held a fundraiser just after I started. The only people they invited to the fundraiser were our foster parents. Um, you're asking for money from the exact population the money is supposed to go to. And then of course when parents wanted extra money for something they would ask "bet what about the money from that fundraiser?"

KatieinBkln · August 2014

Yuck. You aren't a bad person. There's an inherent power imbalance when people ask for money at work, especially if one of the requests comes from a superior. That is called coercion, and it's gross.

Story time: My first job out of college was at the YMCA, where they ask you to donate "time, talent, or money." And I was all, um, no. First of all you don't pay me enough, second of all I work overtime most weeks, third of all NO. The sense of entitlement nonprofits can have is mind-boggling. Like, of course you should have a pledge drive targeting your members; of course! That's reasonable and fair. But asking employees who already "give" to your company by virtue of their employment there is skeezy, and "encouraging" (i.e. requiring) them to do so is criminal. I didn't have the confidence to say this back then, but I have since learned: I. Do. Not. Work. For. Free. I give when the spirit moves me; anything else is not a gift.

JCbride2015 · August 2014

Yep, I've worked at a few nonprofits and it was the same way. Now that I no longer teach I give small amounts to TFA, and I give to PIRG because I was impressed with their work while I was there. But sorry, when I'm working 40-50 hours per week for you-- nope, I give enough. Not donating.

morphemes · August 2014

flantastic said:

morphemes said:

Yep I used to work for a non-profit that REQUIRED employees to donate at least 10% of their paychecks to them! There were so many issues at that place that I don't know where to start, but when you were hired on, the donation form was pre-filled out and you had to sign or they wouldn't give you the job.

Oh my gosh. They can't just say, "We're a non-profit and don't have much money, so we'll pay you 10% less?"

You would think...no one goes into the non-profit world for the money.

mysticl · August 2014

morphemes said:

flantastic said:

morphemes said:

Yep I used to work for a non-profit that REQUIRED employees to donate at least 10% of their paychecks to them! There were so many issues at that place that I don't know where to start, but when you were hired on, the donation form was pre-filled out and you had to sign or they wouldn't give you the job.

Oh my gosh. They can't just say, "We're a non-profit and don't have much money, so we'll pay you 10% less?"

You would think...no one goes into the non-profit world for the money.

Agency 1:

We paid our part time staff psychiatrist who spend approximately 5 minutes a month with each client roughly half a million dollars a year. Meanwhile the front line staff who spent 40+ hours a week with the clients made less to start than the Burger King down the street.

Agency 2:

Met the criteria to be considered a small business. We billed approximately $300,000 a month when I was there.

The idea that non-profits don't have a lot of money is a myth. Some are multimillion corporations. Go to https://www.guidestar.org and look up a few. The information is based on what each agency files with the IRS.

CMGragain · August 2014

I was very embarrassed when I was asked to contribute to African American Scholarships. I was one of the very few white teachers in the school, and that school had a population of 100% black students.. I told them I would be happy to contribute to scholarship funds, but not ones that were racially biased. I got side-eyed. I stood my ground.

manateehugger · August 2014

I don't donate to any organization without doing research on what exactly my money is going toward. I usually prefer to directly volunteer through various events or programs, because I then know that my effort is actually valuable to the people who need help.

Senecaf · August 2014

I don't think you are terrible. My last company liked to give rewards when people donated to all of their preferred causes. Like casual days and stuff. So awkward when you don't donate. Ugh. I hate that feeling.

lyndausvi · August 2014

You are not terrible.

I don't mind giving to a cause, it's just we are being bombarded by them. It's getting too much. All those causes start adding up.

southernbelle0915 · August 2014

Senecaf said:

I don't think you are terrible. My last company liked to give rewards when people donated to all of their preferred causes. Like casual days and stuff. So awkward when you don't donate. Ugh. I hate that feeling.

This is what my company does. If you want to wear jeans on Fridays, you have to donate...

I mean, I get it.. they don't even have to offer the option to wear jeans at all. I know that. But still it's like jeans are a big fat badge every week to show who donates and who doesn't. Senior management notices.

ETA: words

mschristie123 · August 2014

I work for an agency that is associated with United Way. I few months back we were given the donation sheet for United Way in our therapist's meeting and told to mark how much we were willing to donate from each paycheck each week. Our supervisor basically said that everyone needs to donate, even if it's a $1 per check. I filled the form during the meeting, and the promptly put it my desk drawer and forgot about it.

ShellD13 · August 2014

southernbelle0915 said:

Senecaf said:

I don't think you are terrible. My last company liked to give rewards when people donated to all of their preferred causes. Like casual days and stuff. So awkward when you don't donate. Ugh. I hate that feeling.

This is what my company does. If you want to wear jeans on Fridays, you have to donate...

I mean, I get it.. they don't even have to offer the option to wear jeans at all. I know that. But still it's like jeans are a big fat badge every week to show who donates and who doesn't. Senior management notices.

ETA: words

I worked at a company like this too....we didn't do it often (maybe twice a year) so when it rolled around I'd just put in for my team. They enjoyed being able to dress down occaisionally so it gave me a way to thank my staff and it didn't cost all that much.

steph861 · August 2014

southernbelle0915 said:

Senecaf said:

I don't think you are terrible. My last company liked to give rewards when people donated to all of their preferred causes. Like casual days and stuff. So awkward when you don't donate. Ugh. I hate that feeling.

This is what my company does. If you want to wear jeans on Fridays, you have to donate...

I mean, I get it.. they don't even have to offer the option to wear jeans at all. I know that. But still it's like jeans are a big fat badge every week to show who donates and who doesn't. Senior management notices.

ETA: words

For serious?! Ugh.

Am I a horrible person?

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