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Wedding Etiquette Forum

When did you give your "thank you" gifts?

FI suggested at the rehearsal dinner, what does proper etiquette say? 
The only draw back to the rehearsal dinner I see is that the SOs and dates of the wedding party will have nothing to open. 


Side Story: Went to 5 weddings this past summer and I have yet to receive ONE thank you note. My personal goal for thank you notes is two weekends after the wedding. 

Re: When did you give your "thank you" gifts?

  • We did it at our rehearsal dinner. For several members of the WP, that was the only time we'd see them before the wedding since they traveled from out of state. And actually, it was the first time many of them were meeting each other since we didn't have any pre-wedding parties.
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  • I gave gifts at my bridal luncheon. DH gave his guys their gifts at the RD. He just gave them to them, so it wasn't like people noticed it or felt left out.
  • indianaalumindianaalum member
    500 Love Its 500 Comments First Anniversary Name Dropper
    edited August 2014
    Rehearsal dinner. I think dates understand, so I wouldn't worry...THOUGH, i did have a funny thing on that.

    We just started handing them out and of course, our little flower girls happened to be near the end (not on purpose) . they actually came up to us when we handed out stuff and said "I think you forgot us". Of course, we hadn't, we just started grabbing the gift bags in random order and they happened to be last..Poor things...So do kids FIRST so they don't think you forgot them! LMAO

    (Etiquette wise: I Know their behavior was probably rude, but they are cute and we love them, so we just laughed it off when they did it. It was one of those "Oh, we should have thought of that moments"  They are still just little kids who were excited LOL
  • We gave our parents thank you gifts at the RD and we each gave our bridal parties their gifts/thank you notes in the morning before the ceremony.
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  • The morning of the wedding while I was getting ready.
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • We gave ours at the rehearsal dinner. I have also always received my gift at the rehearsal dinner with the exception of the wedding that didn't have a rehearsal dinner. In that case they just gave the gifts to each person privately.
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  • I have some shy girls in my bridal party so I'm going to give them their gifts the morning of the wedding as we're getting ready. I know they wouldn't want a lot of attention on them at the RD (and ours is going to be fairly large).


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  • I don't remember the opening of the bridal party gifts to be that big a deal.  We were handed gift bags after dinner at the rehearsal dinner and some of us opened them right away, some of us waited a few minutes to finish a drink or conversation.  It wasn't a "Now, everybody watch Lisa open her gift" kind of thing.  Bride and groom stood up to thank everyone.  And went on with our evening.
  • I gave mine the morning of as we were getting our hair done.
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    Anniversary
  • I've always gotten mine at the rehearsal dinner.

    I handed mine over as we left the church to head to the rehearsal dinner.
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  • I gave mine to my girls while we were getting ready the day of. DH gave his BM a card with an IOU in it and I think he finally gave him the actual gift like 3 weeks later. It was kind of a long story, but luckily his BM just laughed and was fine with the IOU.
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  • We did ours at our RD. 
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  • ashleyepashleyep member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Name Dropper First Anniversary
    edited August 2014
    All of my bridesmaids stayed at the hotel. I gave them their gifts right before the rehearsal dinner. I didn't want to do it privately, so I chose to do it at the hotel.

    And in response to your second post - tomorrow is two weeks for us. We have probably 2/3 written, and a good chunk of them in the mail. I need to run to target and get some more, but I'm also hoping to finish them this weekend or early next week.
    Anniversary
  • I gave MOH get gift the day she moved. I had gotten her gift cards to the three best nail salons in the city she was moving to. It would be silly to hold onto them until the wedding. I gave BM her gifts the other night when we went out to dinner. I didn't want to make a big deal in front of other people either.
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