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Snarky Brides
vh2014
member
RSVP - What?
Ok... let me start by saying I am completely ok with this person not coming to my wedding. My "scratching the head" side eye is only about the RSVP... or lack there of followed by a last minute RSVP.
We worked really hard to get RSVPs from all of our guests. One couple was a question. After the deadline we called, texted, and reached out on FB. I figured they weren't coming but included them in the seating plan anyway. We are having buffet, the caterer didn't charge me for them and told me not to worry about it, there would be plenty of food if they showed up. We added them to our private FB group for yes's that we are using to keep everyone informed (lots of compliments on that and have been careful not inundate just provide hotel deadlines, shuttle schedules, and now first look at weather) . They have been all over FB since that group was created. No response. So whatever, FI thinks they are coming. I am thinking probably not... but still accounting for them just in case...
So today the wife posts on the FB page that they aren't going to make it. Uh.... it's 9 days out, you just got married a couple years ago so you know about caterers and wedding planning and you've planned several big banquets... and you tell me 9 days out? I think I would have rathered they be a no show. No harm no foul.. it actually works out better for me as their table was the one table besides one with small kids that had 10 people so I feel better about that, I didn't pay the caterer for them, and I was short 2 premade chair bows somehow and was going to have to make them this weekend. Much better for me, so not complaining but who doesn't respond to the RSVP (addressed and stamped, very nice non-casual invitaion), phone calls, texts, emails, or FB messages and then just randomly posts to the event wall that they have too much going on and won't make it 9 days before a wedding? No apology, very cheerful message, but WHAT?
OK.. head scratching now over. Like I said, works out better for me but just had to share. And yes, I still consider her a friend and that won't change. I'm sure we'll laugh about it at a later event.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: RSVP - What?
We are Polish and any party we've hosted had a regrets only RSVP for this reason: usually with Polish weddings/parties, the hosts assume everyone can come, unless they specifically say they cannot. It's assumed you will be there for your brother's/cousin's/neighbor's/random friend from 2nd grade's wedding unless you reach out and say that you can't make it.
As far as food goes, they serve dinner the whole night in Poland. Plus, a lot of weddings are two days long, with another hosted party the day after. So the plate count thing is not really needed. There is vodka on every table (replaced as needed) as well as a bar, so again the per person count doesn't "matter". I'm not sure how they pay for these venues, but I'm assuming it may be a base rate + consumption thing rather than all in advance.