Wedding Customs & Traditions Forum
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Being seen by everyone before the wedding

My fiance and I are getting married on a ship in April 2015. Before that, we will be staying at a hotel that is directly across the street from the dock. It is a 4 minute walk (if even that!) and it is not possible to get any closer to the ship with a car, because the dock is on the other side of a park without any vehicle access. I've inserted a photo of the route at the bottom of this message to show what I mean.

The bride can board the ship 15-20 minutes before the rest of the guests, but I expect that most if not all of my guests will already be waiting on the dock for their time to board, since this is a wedding you can't run late to - if you're not on board when the ship leaves the dock, you're not making it to the wedding! This means that I expect to be seen by most of the guests prior to the ceremony. Is this considered a faux pas? I never really thought of how the bride magically appears at the ceremony without being seen, though I've never seen one before the ceremony! Do you guys have any suggestions for the best way to handle this? Or is this not a big deal at all?

Side note: My fiance and I are doing first looks and photography with the wedding party prior to leaving for the ship, so these are not concerns about him seeing me before the ceremony - just the rest of the guests!

Thanks all!

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Re: Being seen by everyone before the wedding

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    Not a faux pas - completely personal decision. I agree some of the big reveal might go away, BUT it will still be the last walk you take before being your FI's wife.
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    Nothing wrong with that at all. 

    I got married on the 95th floor of a downtown high rise. I ran into my SIL on the street outside and rode the elevator up with my in-laws. 

    If you get there super early, you can hide out in a bathroom or something if they will let you on. 
    Image result for someecard betting someone half your shit youll love them forever
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    I ran into my husband's family in the lobby of our shared hotel. In your situation, there probably isn't any way to avoid it.
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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    Thanks everyone! Really glad to hear that this is one less thing I need to worry about. ;) What a relief!
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    Nah. A LOT of our guests arrived early and saw me as I was coming back from taking family/bridal party photos. You're fine.
    Anniversary

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    lyndausvilyndausvi mod
    First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited August 2014
    you are good. I use to work on a boat (smallish sailboat). The bride always just hung out with the guests until the ceremony. (cocktail hour while sailing to the spot. NBD. We did have a couple of brides who choose to dress on the boat so people didn't she her. They were the exception though. Most of the couples did first looks before getting on our boat.






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
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    I got married on cruise ship.  I had hair & makeup done before boarding with everyone, so they all saw that (even FI), but nobody saw me in my dress. Then I quickly got dressed on the ship before the ceremony (I had about 1/2 hour to get dressed). At my sisters wedding, several people came late while she was preparing to walk down aisle, so many of her guests saw her before the wedding.  Yeah, it may ruin the wow factor when walking in, but you'll be more focused on your FI than the guests reaction anyway.

    If you are really concerned, you could show up earlier, get down near the boat, then have someone hold other guests back off the dock until after you are able to board.  You may have a few people see you from a distance, but that's not the same as seeing all the detail up close.  Or even bring a sheet or something that you could use to conceal your dress.

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    Definitely not a faux pas. You're good, girl!
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    Plenty of couples greet their guests at the door of the church or other venue before the ceremony. People know what the bride and groom look like. The guests have come for the marrying event, not for the fashion show.
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    lc07lc07 member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    I don't get the need to have a big reveal of the bride. I wanted to spend a lot of time with our guests. I was stoked to see people before the ceremony. I didn't want to be hidden in a closet somewhere.
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    Late to the game, I know, but ditto PPs.

    I had a friend who mingled with guests before her ceremony.  I'll admit that I was like, "Whoa, why is she out here?" at first, but it was totally fine.  I still cried when she walked down the aisle.

    She told me later it was actually unplanned, and she was upset at first, but she ended up really liking it.  It helped her to relax a bit, and she said she felt less anxious about walking down the aisle knowing everyone had already seen her.  Because of that she was more focused on her groom than on her own anxiety about having everyone stare at her.




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    I'll be sharing cocktails and canapés with our guests as well as Fi prior to the ceremony.

    So it's just personal preference, but it's fine however you do it.
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    Some people saw me before hand.  Some people actually took pictures with me before.  It didn't' bother me. 
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