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FI wants to have symmetry with the wedding party.

He doesn't believe me when I say it's fine not to have symmetry. I have 6 girls and he has 2 boys, and has more to add if he wants equal sides. I tell him his side is absolutely whatever he wants, but I don't want him to have to pick people just for equal sides. If he still wants to add those extra people in the end, then by golly he should do that. But only because he wants them, not because he wants equal sides. Back me up!
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Re: FI wants to have symmetry with the wedding party.

  • When is your wedding?

    I would just worry about it being last minute and the other guys feeling like they were b-listed groomsmen or something.  There's nothing wrong with not asking everyone at the same time though.




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  • When is your wedding?

    I would just worry about it being last minute and the other guys feeling like they were b-listed groomsmen or something.  There's nothing wrong with not asking everyone at the same time though.

    We don't have a specific date but next May or June. We just doubt anyone will say no. Maybe one of my girls will but then it would be 5 and 2.
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  • Uhhh.... tell him more ladies for his gentlemen ;)
  • edited September 2014
    Has he ever used google images? 

    Anyway, why would he want to add 4 extra people who he didn't want to add in the first place? I agree it's his call, but that's going to cost y'all. That's potentially 8 extra people at the RD, 4 extra gifts, 4 extra bouts, 8 extra people at whatever head table you might have, etc. I mean, depending on your plans and budget, this might end up costing you over $1,000. 

    If I were you, I'd price out about what it's going to cost and then ask him whether he wants to have even sides, or go on a trip somewhere? Or get a new TV? Or upgrade your place? etc.... I'd be pretty surprised if he still chooses even sides.

    etf words
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  • I would show him pictures of uneven wedding parties, and tell him how cool it looks. Even sides are lame and overdone! 
  • Wait you moved from December?

    Put up mirrors. Boom. Perfect symmetry.

    (Sorry, I'm on vacation mode, about to leave for TC. No helpful advice from me today.)

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  • My FI said the same thing. He insisted that (he thought) that's just how you had to do it, until I explained that these are our loved ones, not props to make us look pretty - and he should have whomever he truly wants to stand up with him, and shouldn't ask anyone just to stand up there to fill a space.
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  • @lolo883 Have so much fun!

    FI's parents just vacationed there a few weeks ago with their friends who have a summer house there.  I haven't been, but their pictures are gorgeous!




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  • This is what you can do for pics and ceremony. You and FI in the middle. One GM on your side, one GM on his side. 3 BMs on your side and 3 BMs on his. I guess you won't be able to have this girls on one side and boys on one side sort of symmetry but there are other ways to do it. The boys can even sit on the lawn/beach/floor (wherever you guys will be) and have the girls on each of the B&G's side.
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  • This is what you can do for pics and ceremony. You and FI in the middle. One GM on your side, one GM on his side. 3 BMs on your side and 3 BMs on his. I guess you won't be able to have this girls on one side and boys on one side sort of symmetry but there are other ways to do it. The boys can even sit on the lawn/beach/floor (wherever you guys will be) and have the girls on each of the B&G's side.
    This is exactly what I was going to suggest, if he's dead-set on even sides. He could even have both GMs on his side and then take two of your BMs.
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  • This is what you can do for pics and ceremony. You and FI in the middle. One GM on your side, one GM on his side. 3 BMs on your side and 3 BMs on his. I guess you won't be able to have this girls on one side and boys on one side sort of symmetry but there are other ways to do it. The boys can even sit on the lawn/beach/floor (wherever you guys will be) and have the girls on each of the B&G's side.
    This is exactly what I was going to suggest, if he's dead-set on even sides. He could even have both GMs on his side and then take two of your BMs.
    Ditto this. You have an even party already, just more girls than guys. I have 3 BM and a bridesman and FI has 2 groomsman so he wants to take my bridesman for pictures and stuff. It shouldn't be a big deal

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  • Girl, good luck. This is a battle I personally didn't win.  Let us know how it turns out!
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  • Wait you moved from December?


    Put up mirrors. Boom. Perfect symmetry.

    (Sorry, I'm on vacation mode, about to leave for TC. No helpful advice from me today.)
    I was just in Tc a few weeks ago! We moved to June because we are too excited
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  • Actually, I love the idea of having the girls split up because a few girls are actually his sisters. I love them like my own sisters, but having them stand on his side would be cute! 

    He says he will think about it. That means you guys changed his mind, but he is proud and will wait awhile so it looks like it was his own choice to change his mind. lol.

    THANKS
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